Childhood fears. Working with children's fears (from work experience)

Psychotherapy and psychological correction of children's fears is a well-developed area of ​​science, and there are several theories on how to overcome children's fears. Their types, causes and features of manifestation are also described.

Of interest is the psychoanalysis of children's fears, as in practice it proves the effectiveness of psychoanalytic therapy in working with children, and also indicates the underlying causes of children's fears.

"Birds"

Children are sensitive and impressionable beings. Most children develop fears at some point in their lives, whether they're just fleeting frightening fantasies or real phobias. What if the child is afraid, how to deal with children's fears?

Every person is different in their personal experience, and every childhood experience has its own unique story. But there are some typical types of childhood fears, each of which can be associated with certain internal or external circumstances.

Fear of separation

Psychoanalysis of children's fears describes the separation mechanism as one of the basic concepts, which means the separation of the child and the mother (or the person replacing the mother) from each other.

Separation itself is a healthy and inevitable process that accompanies the growing up of a child.

However, if the separation is forced or the child is separated from the mother for a long time, then the threat of separation from the mother can be excessive and difficult to bear. Separation anxiety also manifests itself in other fears (in children and adults), for example, in the fear of loneliness, rejection, loss or death of loved ones.

Fear of the dark

The fear of the dark and also the fear of fantastic monsters, monsters, negative characters in fairy tales are normal fears in children up to school age.

WITH biological point vision, the fear of darkness and the unknown is quite useful - darkness means lack of security, the need to be on the alert.

Normally, these fears help to learn how to cope with frightening fantasies and develop certain defense mechanisms. But sometimes such fantasies turn out to be not at all harmless - strong fears can cause sleep and behavior disorders, disrupt the emotional balance of the child and lead to the development of neurosis.

Neurosis, the symptom of which may be fear of the dark, in children is relatively easy to correct. But if you do not turn to a specialist in time, then such a neurosis eventually turns into a pathological element in the personality of an adult and it is not so easy to cure it.

Fear of physical harm

Classical psychoanalysis of childhood fears considers the so-called castration anxiety to be an important phenomenon, which is expressed in the fear of losing a part of the body, getting physically injured, and so on.

Some experts include psychogenic constipation in this group of fears - the fear of defecation in children may be associated with the perception of intestinal contents as part of their own body.

This is also a completely normal fear that needs to be corrected only if it interferes normal functioning child's psyche.

Traumatic fears and phobias

Also, often children are afraid of a particular object or action, for example, dogs, transport, kindergarten or school, water, doctors, and so on. As a rule, these fears are associated with some kind of traumatic experience, while the circumstance of getting injured can be a real situation or seen in cartoons and even books.

Children can be strongly impressed by fears instilled by adults or older siblings. That is why bullying is an inadequate parenting strategy.

It is especially dangerous to instill in children the fear of doctors (“if you don’t obey, the doctor’s call to give you an injection”), police officers (“the policeman will pick you up”) and other service employees who can help in an emergency.

Ways to correct children's fears can be very different depending on the nature and content of fear in a particular child. But there are more or less general scheme how work with children's fears is built in psychological counseling and psychotherapy.

The main stages of psychological correction of children's fears

When working with fears, it is important to keep in mind not only the symptom, but also the cause of its occurrence ( psychological diagnosis). This applies especially to children's fears, since children's fears develop easily and very quickly.

Without working out the cause, new fears may arise in a short time after consultations with a psychologist. That's why A complex approach to treatment childhood fear includes several stages.

Diagnostics

In different areas of psychology, the diagnosis of children's fears is carried out using different methods. To identify the problem, the psychologist can invite the child to play with toys in the sandbox, draw a picture or several pictures, tell a story, answer a few questions.

Before or after communicating with the baby, the psychologist will also listen to the complaints of the parents and ask them their questions. As a result of the initial consultation, the specialist will get an idea of ​​what the problem of children's fears is, what is their subject content and, possibly, what is the reason for their appearance.

This information will allow you to draw up a correction plan and select adequate methods for a particular case. In some cases, identifying children's fears requires more time - for example, when working with autistic or emotionally inhibited children.

Establishing contact with a psychologist

During the first few meetings, the specialist establishes contact with the child in order to create an atmosphere of trust and acceptance. This is a necessary condition for the child to be able to relax, feel safe and begin to freely express his feelings in the presence of a psychologist.

Trust is especially important if the specialist carries out a psychoanalysis of children's fears. For a deep understanding of the symbols that fill the child's fantasy world, it is necessary to become an observer and participant in spontaneous children's play.

Correctional work

In some cases, for the implementation of the correction, it is enough to provide the child with a safe space where he can express and work out his internal conflict in a playful way.

Psychoanalysis of children's fears involves the reproduction in the game of all ambivalent and contradictory feelings that can prevent the child's psyche from functioning adequately to reality.

Depending on what kind of suppressed or repressed emotions are reflected in the game, the therapist can stimulate the response of certain emotions, as well as name these feelings so that the child can recognize and process them.

Final stage

If overcoming of children's fears is successful, then after a few meetings with a psychologist, the manifestations of fear become noticeably less or completely cease to disturb the child.

At this stage, it is important to consolidate the result so that the defeated fear does not flare up with renewed vigor after some time. First of all, it is necessary to create an opportunity for counseling for parents, in parallel with the correction of the child.

Most of the fears are related in one way or another to parent-child relationships. Therefore, talking with parents about how to deal with children's fears, one should not underestimate their role.

At the stage of correction, the process can vary significantly in different cases in form, content and duration. Usually, working with fear takes from three to four to several dozen sessions with a psychologist or psychotherapist.

Forms and methods of correcting children's fears

In working with children, such forms of work are popular as:

• play therapy;
• dance movement therapy;
• body-oriented therapy;
• art therapy;
• sand therapy;
• fairy tale therapy.

1. Interpretation is an explanation to the child of his feelings and experiences and the formation of more advanced processing mechanisms.
2. Responding - creating a safe environment for expressing emotions, such as repressed aggression and anger.
3. Desensitization is a gradual decrease in the intensity of fear through the sequential presentation of frightening stimuli (used to correct phobias).
4. Containerization is the unconditional acceptance of the child's feelings that he is not able to cope with on his own.

Of course, this is far from full list techniques used by child psychologists. Psychologist consultation for parents will help to overcome children's fears, where they can ask questions and get practical recommendations. However, for moms and dads who are concerned about childhood fears and overcoming them, some general advice can come in handy.

Overcoming fear is much easier if parents help the child feel more confident and create a safe atmosphere in the family. In order for the baby to feel safe, parents can:

1. Be near. This is especially true for parents of small children (up to about 5 years old), who are worried about their mother leaving for work, are reluctant to agree to stay with someone else, and do not like to go to kindergarten. But contact with parents is important for absolutely all children, even teenagers. It is not so much the quantity of communication that matters, but its quality. A sense of security accompanies close emotional contact - joint games, physical contact (hugs, tickling, motion sickness, and so on).
2. Eliminate bullying education. It is advisable not only to avoid fear manipulation, but also to protect the child from intimidation by the people around him: educators, grandparents, older brothers and sisters, and so on. Overcoming fears is much easier together.
3. Allow to be afraid. Sometimes it is important for a child to simply survive the fear, cope with it and develop further. This is a positive process and should not be interfered with. When a child is scared, it’s great to support him in the spirit of “you are scared, but I believe that you can handle it.” But you should not try to forbid the child to be afraid (“it’s not scary at all, don’t make it up”), because in this case, feelings of guilt and inferiority will be added to fear.

It is important to remember that the experiences of children deserve attention, no matter how ridiculous and stupid they may seem to adults. The psyche of a child is an amazing and fragile world that a person, having matured, carries inside himself all his life. Therefore, children's experiences deserve the attention and care of adults.

Corrective work to overcome

children's fears in consultative practice child psychologist

master SULIMENKO Andrey Nikolaevich

LITERATURE

Zakharov A.I. How to overcome the fears of children. M., 1986.

Zakharov A.I. Prevention of deviations in the behavior of the child. M., 1997.

Zakharov A.I. Neurosis in children and psychotherapy. SPb., 1998.

Masgutova S. K. Psychological rehabilitation of children who survived a railway accident (from work experience). // "Issues of psychology, 1990, No. 1.

There was a plague from city to city
and killed in each of them only half the population.
She knew the others would die themselves. Because of fear.

From a parable

Most often, parents of preschoolers and younger schoolchildren turn to a psychologist. One of the reasons for the appeal is the fears of the child.

For the first time in domestic and world practice, he revealed the causes of the emergence and development of daytime and nighttime fears in children Zakharov Alexander Ivanovich, Doctor of Psychology, Candidate of Medical Sciences, Professor of the Russian State Pedagogical University. A. I. Hercena, pediatrician, psychologist and family psychotherapist, academician of the Baltic Pedagogical Academy. It presents statistical data showing the influence of various factors, primarily family relationships, on the formation of these fears in terms of pediatrician and a psychologist.

The origin of fears in children is a rather complicated problem. In the emergence of fears, the role of the instinct of self-preservation is great, which prescribes to beware of the unknown. Therefore, the child is frightened at a loud, incomprehensible sound, is afraid of unknown objects, strangers and even his own parents, when they appear before him in an unknown guise, for example, in a new fur coat, a large shaggy hat, and he cannot immediately recognize them. Fear breeds pain. Hence the fear of heights, stairs in children who fell and badly bruised. The fear of losing a mother, which comes from the instinct of self-preservation, is innate - and hence fear of loneliness. The child animates nature. And in fairy tales for him, animals, plants and fictional characters live by human passions, love and hate, thank and punish. From here fears of the dark, the forest, the wolf, fairy-tale characters.

Stages of work practical psychologist:

І. Collection of preliminary information;

ІІ. Correction;

At the stage of collecting preliminary information, a conversation is held with the parents of the child (the person who applied for help). For getting additional information, about the features of child-parent relationships, the following questionnaires are used:

questionnaire of parental attitude (ORO) A.Ya. Varga and V.V. Stolin - to diagnose the parental position in relation to the child.

"Analysis of family relationships" (DIA) E.G. Eidemiller. This technique makes it possible to identify various types of inharmonious family upbringing (emotional rejection, dominant and condoning hyperprotection, abuse, increased moral responsibility and hypoprotection), and deviations in the relationship of parents to children, as well as personal unconscious problems of parents.

Based on my own experience, I can conclude that the treatment of a child without parental therapy most often does not bring positive results. 90% of all the fears of children are generated by the family and steadfastly supported by it.

I suggest that the child make drawings on the topic “Non-existent animal”, “My family” with further discussion of these topics.

In conclusion, the children are offered a test to diagnose whether they have fears.

The number of identified fears was compared with the norms proposed by A.I. Zakharov.

Start asking about fears, supposedly Zakharov A.I. list makes sense in children not earlier than 3 years, while the questions should be made understandable at this age. The conversation is conducted slowly and in detail, listing fears and expecting answers "yes" - "no" or "I'm afraid" - "I'm not afraid." Repeating the question of whether the child is afraid or not is only necessary from time to time. This avoids the suggestion of fears, their involuntary suggestion. With the stereotypical denial of all fears, they are asked to give detailed answers such as "I'm not afraid of the dark" or "I'm afraid of the dark", and not "no" or "yes". The adult asking questions sits next to, and not in front of the child, not forgetting to periodically encourage and praise him for telling it like it is. And the last thing: it is better for an adult to list fears from memory, only occasionally glancing at the list, and not read it out.

"Tell me, please, are you afraid or not afraid:

1. when you are alone;
2. attacks;
3. get sick, get infected;
4. die;
5. that your parents will die;
6. some people;
7. moms or dads;
8. that they will punish you;
9. Baba Yaga, Koshchei the Immortal, Barmaley, the Serpent Gorynych, monsters (schoolchildren add to this list the fears of the Invisibles, Skeletons, the Black Hand, Queen of Spades- the whole group of these fears is designated as the fears of fairy-tale characters);
10. be late for the garden (school);
11. before falling asleep;
12. bad dreams(which ones);
13. darkness;
14. wolf, bear, dogs, spiders, snakes (animal fears);
15. cars, trains, planes (fears of transport);
16. storms, hurricanes, floods, earthquakes (fears of the elements);
17. when very high (fear of heights);
18. when very deep (fear of depth);
19. in a cramped, small room, room, toilet, overcrowded bus, subway (fear of closed spaces);
20. water;
21. fire;
22. fire;
23. war;
24. large streets, squares;
25. doctors (except dentists);
26. blood (when there is blood);
27. injections;
28. pain (when it hurts);
29. unexpected, sharp sounds, when something suddenly falls, knocks (you are afraid, you shudder at the same time).

Two more fears do something wrong , wrong (bad - in preschoolers) and not be in time - can be specified additionally. Together with fear of being late (No. 10) p a similar triad of fears will unmistakably indicate the presence of social anxiety as an increased background of anxiety. This may be the norm, but not earlier than 8-9 years and in the absence of obsessive fears and doubts about this.
In total, there are 29 different fears in the main list. The unit of reference is the average number of fears, which is compared with a similar number obtained by dividing the sum of all fears in the control group corresponding to the age of your child by the number of A.I. Zakharov in her children and adolescents. A total of 2135 children and adolescents from 3 to 16 years old were interviewed, of which 1078 were boys and 1057 were girls. The average for each year was 83 boys and 81 girls. The obtained data are presented in the form of a table.

Table. The average number of fears (according to A.I. Zakharov).

We see a significant increase in the number of fears in the older preschool age. Compared to boys, the total number of fears in girls is significantly higher both at preschool and school age. Too many fears (over 14 in boys and 16 in girls) may indicate the development of neurosis or anxiety in character and the relevance of their elimination, along with a more critical approach to one's relationships with children, one's own fears and anxieties.

It should be remembered that anxiety as a diffuse feeling of anxiety weakens the severity of most fears, the contours of which become less defined, more blurred. The reverse picture is when there are few fears, but they are clearly focused, as is the case with obsessive fears-phobias that can absorb the entire charge of the negative energy of other fears.

Naturally, if the child's fear is alarming due to its excessiveness, unusualness, causeless, psychologically incomprehensible, bizarre, absurd, distracts the child from real life, is the core of all his experiences, you should immediately contact a child psychiatrist.

PSYCHOLOGICAL TREATMENT

In the psychological and pedagogical literature, various methods for correcting fears of various etiologies are described. In general, all the proposed methods can be conditionally divided into three groups:

play with fear

drawing fear;

verbalization of fear (fairy tales, stories, scary).

Working with a child, I intrude directly into the situation, causing fear in a child in order to change his attitude towards her. To do this, the following psychological techniques are used. At the first stage work with fears, a conversation is held with the child. At the same time, the internal state of the child is monitored, the place of localization of fear, its size, color is revealed: “Close your eyes, remember the situation when fear arose. Look at what part of your body it is located, whether it has a shape or not, what color it is, what size it is. Then there is a discussion of the child's feelings. If fear does not have a specific figurative expression, then it is proposed to combine it with some image: “And if it were some kind of image, then what would it be?”
At the next stage The child is invited to draw an image of fear that has arisen in him. Then there is a discussion of the drawing, during which the child needs to make a choice: “You can destroy your fear (cut, tear, burn) or defeat it, or you can make friends with it.” Usually children choose positive methods of problem solving, that is, they want to make friends with fear so that it no longer frightens them.
If the child makes such a choice, then the work continues. He is invited to draw the image of his fear completely fearless.

Drawing fear. This is the most popular technique. It is useful for correcting various fears, but above all those that are generated by the imagination: fear of illness, attack, natural disasters, transport, fairy-tale characters, etc. Graphic representation of fears requires strong-willed efforts and reduces anxious expectations their implementation.
In the process of drawing, there is a “revival” of the feeling of fear, but at the same time, an awareness of the conditional nature of its image. The object of fear is consciously manipulated and creatively transformed. In subsequent tasks, the psychologist suggests drawing in such a way that it can be seen that the child is not afraid. The absence of the author's image in the drawing indicates the exceptional intensity and possible obsessive nature of fear, and the image of oneself in an active role indicates overcoming this state. Gradually, faith in one's own strengths and capabilities appears.
In the process of drawing, great importance is given to the color solution of the problem. Some authors insist on the need to paint fear only in black, which is associated with the night. Moreover, the child must be taught to see beauty, nobility, stars, with which legends are associated, in the black space of the sheet. In conclusion, drawing on the topic is useful: “What I am no longer afraid of.” The child should depict his fear on a piece of paper. This task is done at home for two weeks. At the second meeting, I invite the child to think and depict on the reverse side of the same sheet how he is not afraid of this fear. Thus, unconscious fear is brought to the level of consciousness, and by reflecting on his fear, the child heals himself. And if the child refuses to draw on the back of the sheet, and says that the fear is very strong and he does not know what needs to be done to get rid of it. In such a case, in the presence of a child, I take a sheet with a picture of fear and burn it with the words: “You see, a small handful of ash remains from the evil monster, and now we will blow it away, and the fear will evaporate.”
This somewhat mystical technique works extremely well, it can be used several times until the desired effect is achieved. Write a story about fear. In this case, the task of the psychologist is to bring the child closer to reality, so that he realizes the absurdity of his fear. This is done through the introduction of elements of humor into the story.
An example from a bookstore clinical practice. The girl was afraid of the bear. According to the girl, he could climb into the window of the second floor at night and bite her. Together with the child, we draw a bear on paper, and along the way I tell her about the behavior of this animal in the wild, in the taiga. Bring to class reproductions from paintings by Russian artists who painted bears. Read Krylov's fables "The Bear in the Nets", "The Hardworking Bear", the poem "Toptygin and the Fox". Let me down! (but not impose) the child to the fact that in all fairy tales the bear is presented in the form of a loser, a sweet fool who is a little sorry. Then, together, write a story about how the bear went on a date with the she-bear at night and got lost. He tried to climb into someone else's window, but could not reach and fell into a snowdrift, stuffing a big bump. The girl laughed out loud as she listened to this story over and over again. Now she was no longer afraid of the big, angry bear. Waking up at night, she remembered this joke, smiled and calmly fell asleep. Use of games, small performances and dramatizations. In group classes, I invite children to compose a fairy tale or come up with a scary story. They can begin with the words: “Once upon a time ...” or “Once upon a time ...”. Children of older preschool age with anxiety neurosis, as a rule, come up with stories with a sad ending. My task is to play their stories in a group. But there is no need to insist on this, the child himself must offer his story for staging. Then the author distributes the roles and the performance begins. I recommend using all the methods described above not separately, but in combination. You need to improvise, approach each child individually. Let him choose what he likes best - drawing, writing a story or staging fear. This is a great start for further frank conversation with the child about his internal problems and experiences.

I also want to give a description of other methods of working with fears:

Method "Two chairs".

Abdominal breathing technique.

Method "LZK".

Technique of game dramatization of fears.

I want to remind you that when dramatizing fears therapeutic effect overcoming them is ensured mainly by taking the role of an object or source of threat. In the story with Little Red Riding Hood, this will be the role of the Wolf, who is now as aggressive now as Little Red Riding Hood, that is, the child, was afraid of him.

The reverse role reversal already shows the effect of learning (the therapeutic reaction of negative emotions): the child in the role of Little Red Riding Hood is not only not afraid, but can also “knock in the nose” the Wolf, not to mention the protection of Grandmother from him. So the Hunter is not needed at the end, the ending is already prosperous.

If the child does not dare to immediately enter into a threatening image, then the role-playing dramatization of fears consists of three actions: the child plays, in essence, himself, that is, he is afraid, but still not like in life; then he frightens, and one of the adults plays him as if he is not afraid; the child becomes himself again, but already provides adequate psychological protection. So the fairy tale "Little Red Riding Hood" acts as a successful help for the method of playful dramatization of fears.

Game mitigation method mental trauma ("Birth Canal")

Healing game-catharsis.

Methods of empathic listening by K. Rogers.

The essence of such listening was to listen to the repeated story of the child and, at the moment of maximum “winding up” of difficult affective experiences, abruptly lead him away from the memories of what had happened with a sudden question or story on another topic. At the same time, it is very important for the psychologist to determine in time the moment of the permissible maximum tension of emotions, otherwise the child may have a tantrum. A sign of an acceptable tension of affective experiences can be dilated pupils, opening of the eyes, tremor of the muscles of the face, eyes, lips, "rolling" tears in the child's eyes.

Psychokinesiological gymnastics, aimed at increasing the acceptance of one's self. Its essence boils down to the fact that the use of certain physical reflex movements and exercises, acupressure, etc. promotes "self-respect", "acceptance" self, which is achieved due to symmetrical movements of the arms, legs, head, body or a point effect on them (for example, a mirror image of the hands of "eights" horizontally and vertically, and then connecting them into a 4-petal flower, etc.). Psychokinesiological gymnastics allows you to reveal those potentialities of the human psyche that were not previously known and “used”.

Using the effect of visual color contrasts combined with symmetrical hand movements (overload). “Imagine a blue color, bringing your hands to the bridge of your nose, and now yellow, spreading your arms; further - black - yellow, purple - orange, green - red. It is extremely important that colors that carry a negative emotional charge should be introduced as a last resort. To achieve the desired effect, as practice has shown, the movements with each pair of colors had to be repeated 8-10 times.

Psychogymnastics are accompanied by the use of playing symmetrical techniques: in the starting position, the right hand is held on right ear, and with the left - by the nose, then increasing speed, change the position of the hands. After 8-10 repetitions, the starting position is changed - it becomes symmetrical: with the left hand they hold on to left ear, right - by the nose and produce the movements described above. Another game action: with the right hand, the children make movements in circles above their heads, and with the left they pat on the stomach without making circular motions, then change the position of the hands.

Technique "An identikit of fear". Ask your child if he knows what an identikit is. Surely he heard that this is a portrait of a person drawn by an artist (or created on a computer). Its peculiarity is that the artist himself never saw his character, but painted a portrait from the words of eyewitnesses. Why do we need such portraits? Your child may guess (or know for sure) that they are used, as a rule, in order to find the criminal.

The fear of a child can also be called a criminal, since it interfered with his quiet life (or sweet sleep), for example, last night (or remember another date). But then the troublemaker disappeared (after all, the child does not currently experience acute fear). We need to find it and neutralize it! To do this, imagine that a child comes to the police and writes a statement about the missing wretch. He is asked in detail about all the signs of fear. In the course of the story, an adult (that is, a policeman) draws an identikit. Periodically ask your child something like: “Didn’t this fear have a red mustache?” - and in parallel paint on the mustache in the figure. When the child explains to you that there were no such signs, then erase the mustache.

Note. The more funny details you will assume in the image, the better. However, try to keep the gaming seriousness, because in fact you are now influencing inner world child. And only he himself has the right to laugh at his fears. So stay focused "guardian of the law", let your child laugh at what is happening and at your dullness.

Methodology "Fear and the sculptor". This game will be especially useful for the child if, in the course of previous games and conversations, you noticed that his feeling of fear is associated with others. strong feelings such as anger and rage. Here he will get the opportunity for emotional discharge.

Tell your child a short story that you will then act out:

“The sculptor Denny lived in the same city. He was a real master and sought to perpetuate in sculpture everything that he saw around him. In his collection there were completely different images - and the most lovely girls cities, and weak old people, and evil trolls, who, according to legend, inhabited the forest outside the city. As soon as he met new look, then immediately tried to embody it in stone or plaster. But such images became less and less.

And then one day he was sitting, thinking, in his workshop. Twilight was getting darker. The sky was getting dark and ominous. Danny's heart was full of doubts and worries. And suddenly he felt that fear took possession of his heart. He was so strong that he threatened to escalate into horror. Danny got up and wanted to run away, but he realized that he would be even more scared on the street.

They say fear has big eyes. And so it began to seem to Danny that in the dark corner of the workshop he saw shiny eyes terrible monster. "Who are you?" – barely exhaled frightened Danny. There was a terrible roar in the silence. Then the answer was heard: “I am your fear, great and invincible!” The sculptor was dumbfounded with horror. It looked like he was about to lose consciousness.

But suddenly an interesting thought came into his head - maybe to fashion this fear out of clay? After all, such a terrible image has never been in his collection! Then he plucked up courage and asked: "Mr. Fear, have you ever posed for an artist?" The fear was completely gone. "What?" he asked. “Before you finally take over my mind, let me mold you out of clay so that everyone will be afraid of you and recognize you,” the master suggested. The monster did not expect such a turn of events and mumbled: “Well, go ahead, just hurry!” Work has begun. Danny took the clay and set to work. Now he was collected and focused again.

Since it was getting dark, we had to turn on the light. Imagine Danny's surprise when he was able to get a better look at the monster. It wasn't even a monster, but rather a small monster, puny, as if he hadn't eaten in a week. Fear shivered a little at that; he must have guessed Denny's thoughts. And the master shouted at him: “Don’t twitch, otherwise the curved sculpture will come out!” Fear obeyed.

Finally the sculpture was ready. And Danny suddenly realized that he was not at all afraid of this monster, his fear suddenly became not terrible. He looked at the monster huddled in the corner and asked: “Well, what are we going to do?” The Scarecrow also realized that he was no longer afraid of him here. He sniffed and said: "Yes, I'll probably go." "Why did you come?" Danny asked. “Yes, it became boring alone!” the monster replied. So they parted. And Denny's collection was replenished with a new unusual sculpture. Everyone around was surprised at her originality, and Danny looked at his creation and thought that skillful hands and a smart head could cope with not such horrors.

After you tell this legend, talk with the child, find out if he liked it, what surprised him, pleased him, upset him?

If the child is not too tired after this, then you can immediately proceed to the second stage of work - playing out the story. If fatigue is felt, then it is better to do it the next day.

Let the child be the master. Start reading this fairy tale again (it is possible with abbreviations), and the child will try to portray everything he hears about. When you get to the monster spawning in the workshop, try dimming the lights. Then, when the sculpture begins, you turn it back on, and the child will mold out of plasticine the image of fear, as he imagines it.

Note. The description of this game is quite long, but it's worth it. Indeed, here, in a single harmonious action, several ways of influencing the child's psyche are combined in order to eliminate fear. The story itself is a typical psychotherapeutic fairy tale. Pay attention to how the listener's attitude to what is happening changes in it: from the peak climax of fear and drama of the story to ridicule and even sympathy. When a child plays the role of a master in this scene, this is also the use of a psychotherapeutic technique. And finally, he sculpts a sculpture of his fear from plasticine, and this is the third way of correction, when the child creates a visual image of a feeling, gets the opportunity to control and change it. So do not take the time and effort for such complex psychotherapeutic games. By the way, you can also come up with similar simple stories as a plot to repeat the game at another time.

Methodology "Kinoproby". This is a universal game that can be used to solve many problems. Here I will show you how to help your child overcome their fears using this game.

Help your child imagine trying their hand at acting. The screenwriter (that is, you) will now introduce him to the plot of the future film. Then the young artist will try to reproduce the action. If other people besides him should take part in it, then he can either play for them himself, or use dolls or some kind of toys.

But in inventing plots you will have to show creativity. It should be based on a story that really happened to the child and caused him fear, or an event that is not in the child's life experience, but, nevertheless, the child is afraid of him. If, for example, a child is afraid of getting lost in a crowded place, then you can play the following scene:

Mom and son (daughter) went to the store. In a huge department store, the mother stared at the window, and the child stopped near the toy she liked. So they lost sight of each other. Mom was very worried about her baby, she began to rush around the store in search of him. At first, the child was also confused, even wanted to cry, but then he thought that this would hardly help him find his mother. Then he approached the seller and said that he was lost. The salesperson asked his name and made an announcement over the speakerphone. "Attention attention! the announcer said. “The boy Seryozha (girl Ira) has lost his mother and is waiting for her in the jewelry department.” An excited woman ran to this department in just a minute. She was in a panic. And what did she see? The kid calmly waited for her, examining the jewelry. She hugged her son (daughter) and burst into tears. The child began to comfort his mother that nothing terrible had happened, and the seller told her how calmly and boldly her son (daughter) behaved. Mom was very proud of her child, because he (she) behaved just like an adult.

Let the child play the role, in fact, of himself, and the teacher can act as his absent-minded mother. Then try not to skimp on enthusiasm and a sense of pride in the finale of the story, let the child feel such a reward in the game, so that later he can strive for it in real life.

The same fear of being lost can be “played out” in a scene where the child will help the lost child, that is, initially play the hero. You can take a small doll for the role of a crying baby. So the child will more easily feel responsible for the younger and his advantage in the possibilities of self-control and the search for a solution.

Similar everyday stories are invented by the educators themselves for OBJD classes in order to use them together with the children to combat their real (and not fictional) fears, and increase self-confidence, in their abilities, and, as a result, increase self-esteem.

Note. With the help of this game, you can also implement the so-called prevention of the problem, since, playing a role in a scene you have invented, the child learns one or another strategy of behavior in a difficult situation. Therefore, if he suddenly finds himself really in it, then it will be easier for him to behave the way he once did, although in a game version.

Increasing the overall level of emotional experiences.

The task of this method is to teach the child to experience positive emotions, which has a beneficial effect on his psyche. The main tool is a variety of play activities that increase general level experiences of the child, helps him to establish a trusting relationship with the teacher, other adults, peers. Positive emotional states that arise in children in the process of specially organized situations of success reinforce the need for experiences of happiness, joy, pleasure from play and communication.
The method is not specific to the correction of fears. However, improving the state of the emotional and motivational sphere of the child's personality reduces fears, anxiety, fear of something or someone.

Playing out a situation of interaction with the object of fear. For the game “in fear”, a plot and objects are selected that symbolize what the child is afraid of (a dog, a ghost, etc.). By acting out plots with these objects, he can “deal with” his fear, play out his emotions in a symbolic form and react to stress from a stressful effect.
A method specific for the correction of emotional disorders associated with impaired personal development.

• Emotional switch. Imitation and "infection". It is believed that the attitude of an adult to the object of fear can be perceived by the child through his attitude to this adult, according to the mechanism of emotional switching. Unwittingly, an adult can accidentally “infect” a baby with some kind of fear, for example, a fear of mice, dogs, etc. The same mechanism allows you to get the opposite result.
  Directed fantasizing is useful: “Close your eyes and imagine that you have grown up. What can you be afraid of now?
• Emotional swing. The simplest example of an emotional swing (V.V. Lebedinsky) is tossing a child up: he either flies, feeling in danger, or falls into the hands of an adult, which for him is a symbol of protection. The principle of the swing is the transition from one state to another (opposite).
  Thus, playing with darkness, when a child runs into a dark room for a second and returns to a lighted room, represents a transition from a state of danger to a state of safety.
  It is known that the fear of the dark is one of the most common childhood fears. It is often associated with the fear of the unknown. Children believe that adults are deceiving them when they say that in fact there is nothing to worry about in a dark room. It's just monsters hiding when someone comes in and turns on the light. Images of frightening objects are often a projection of the child's anger, irritation, or bad mood. They contain negative emotions and feelings that are difficult to deal with on your own. Therefore it is necessary to help little man to feel stronger in the face of the danger, to learn to control oneself.
  Fear of the dark and loneliness (F. Zimbardo) is well corrected with the help of the game "Walking Blindly". One child closes his eyes and the other serves as a guide. (Any plot.)
  As a rule, each child has lucky signs and various items that have the meaning of an amulet, a talisman. In order to enhance the sense of security and safety, they must be used, for example, a beloved doll can be assigned the role of a savior, protector.
• Doll therapy. This method based on the process of identifying a child with a kind, fearless hero. The role of this character in the performance can be played by the child himself or by the doll that he voices. The plot must have an introduction, a culmination - the highest tension, situations of danger for the main character, a denouement - the victory of the main character. After finishing puppet show the child is relieved and, as a rule, freed from the excruciating fear.
  The use of fairy-tale characters (T.A. Shishova) is based on the collective unconscious. Puppets can be made from old gloves, for example, a cowardly hare, a wolf, a fox, etc. It turns out a kind of theater in which, under the guise of rehearsals, it is possible to repeat healing stories many times.
  To overcome the fear of fairy-tale characters, children mold "Fairytale City" and its heroes from plasticine. For example, Ivan Tsarevich is performed in three versions: downcast, frightened, formidable with a sword, proud of victory. Serpent Gorynych: ferocious and pitiful (small size).
  To overcome the fear of injections, pain, doctors, the game "Hospital" is used. The child is offered to accurately reproduce all medical procedures, to play the roles of a doctor and a patient. Re-experiencing fear in the game leads to a weakening of its traumatic impact.
• Manipulation of the object of fear. This technique is similar to the previous one in that the child receives an image of a frightening object materialized in the form of a toy, which he can manipulate at his own discretion (control, pacify, perform aggressive actions, destroy, etc.).
• Anatomy of fear. The meaning of this technique is a detailed explanation of what a frightening object is, how it works, what it consists of, etc. Some authors advise using the habituation (desensitization) technique, which reduces sensitivity to a frightening object. For example, you can have small rodent cubs at home. In the process of observing them, playing, caring, the child gradually overcomes the fear of mice.
  Corrective work is carried out not with fear, but with personal relationships child and the causes that gave birth to them. The explanation of the "anatomy" of a frightening object allows you to realize previously incomprehensible, dangerous properties that evoked fear. So, lighting a dark room at night with a flashlight, you can show the child that seemingly scary objects (clothes on hangers, the outline of a closet, etc.) are actually known and familiar during the day.
  Unobtrusively explaining the nature of fears (D. Brett) helps therapeutic stories, which begin with the words: "Once upon a time there was a girl who looked like you ...". In this case, the child needs to put a magic flashlight under the pillow, which is “afraid” of night fear.
  The use of cognitive processes (F. Zimbardo) also helps in the fight against other fears (for example, the fear of speaking in front of peers, a large audience, etc.).
• Verbalization of fear. As you know, "horror stories" of various content are one of the types of original children's folklore (E. Sokolova and others). They show a cathartic response to certain emotional difficulties. Composing and telling a "horror story", the child independently models the emotional overcoming of his fears. Verbalization of fears causes a sensual response, emotional switching, which acts as a psychological defense.
• In the correction of fears, fairy tale therapy is effective - an independent psychotherapeutic technique (T. Zinkevich-Evstigneeva and colleagues).
  Undoubtedly, in the experience of psychotherapeutic work, many other methods of treatment of this serious emotional deviation are used. For certain reasons, some of them are rarely used. Among them is animal therapy (dolphin therapy) - a system of activities with children through the organization of their communication with dolphins.
  The choice of corrective methods depends on many factors, primarily on the nature of fear, the causes of its occurrence and the individual characteristics of the child.

Daily work on the prevention of children's fears:

Conducting a teaching hour on the topic: “How to detect neurotic children in a group?” Anxious children are usually muscularly clamped, constrained, not without reason they say that fear paralyzes a person.

To work with fear, you need to act not only in a psychological direction, but also influence the consequences of this fear, expressed at the physiological level. Children need relaxation and relaxation exercises. In our kindergarten, teachers conduct psycho-gymnastic studies at the end of morning exercises, on a walk.

As a preventive measure for childhood fear neurosis, I find out with the help of questionnaires, when a child enters the kindergarten, in which families there are remarriages, which of the parents is divorced, I study the course of pregnancy, childbirth, the first year of a child’s life in order to take “difficult” children under my control.

On parent meeting I give the task within 30 minutes to write an essay on the topic “What I see bad in my own son (daughter)” on one side of the sheet and “What I see positive in my child” on the other side. Often parents see only negative sides, fixate on them, which reinforces fears in their children.

Kinesiology mini-program

(Galina Borsuk, teacher of the Silva Method)

This program, based on the experience of kinesiology, will not take you much time, but will bring a lot of benefits. Ten minutes of daily exercise - and your vital energy increases significantly, you become more resistant to stress, forget about illnesses. In addition, the program can serve as an instant response therapy for back pain, headaches, common ailments of the digestive system, psychological problems associated with overwork, difficulty concentrating on a particular matter, mood swings. So, exercises that everyone can do, listening to themselves.

1. Thyroid tapping
The thyroid gland is located under the chin, in the middle of the neck. In kinesiology, it is considered, as it were, the central control panel for the vital energy of a person. Place your hand into a slightly relaxed fist, and gently tap it on the neck towards the sternum 10 times, then take a deep breath. Repeat the exercise several times.

2. Touching the forehead.

Touch the fingers of both hands to both projections of the frontal bone above the eyebrows. Close your eyes and press these points for as long as you feel the pulse increase. After that, make circular rotational movements with your eyes. This exercise is recommended to be done several times during the day, as well as the following: put one hand on your forehead, the other on the back of your neck, closer to the back of your head. And hold so, slightly squeezing your head, 1-2 minutes. At emotional stress Tap your finger on the centers of your eyebrows. This exercise relaxes and relieves anxiety.

3. Ear massage

Massage the earlobes with your thumbs and forefingers until you feel a slight warming of the ears. It is best to place the thumb on the back of the lobe, the index finger in front of the ear. Following the massage, gently pull the earlobe back until you feel the tension in the tissues. Repeat several times.
This exercise contributes to the development of memory, helps to recall the necessary information.
The simple act of physically stimulating the outer ear's tactile receptors awakens the entire mechanism of auditory perception. There are 148 points in the auricle, which correspond to various parts body. The legs correspond to the points on the top of the ear, the head - on the lobe. Auricle resembles a human embryo

4. Energy yawns

To perform an energy yawn, massage the muscles around the temporomandibular joint area. This joint is located just in front of the ear opening and is the joint that connects the top and lower jaw. Through this joint pass the trunks of the five main cranial nerves, which collect sensory information from the entire face, eye muscles, tongue and mouth, activate all the muscles of the face, eyes and mouth when chewing and making sounds.
When we are under stress, our jaw often contracts and the transmission of impulses through this area is reduced. Energetic yawns relax the entire face, and then the flow of sensory information is more efficient.

If children are having trouble reading, possible cause this is that their eyes work inconsistently. Stress can also make children hard of hearing. Tension in the jaw-temporal joint can prevent them from talking, which also affects thinking. Energy yawns have a positive effect. By relaxing the muscles and facilitating the functioning of the nerves of the jaw-temporal joint, all related eye functions are improved, facial muscles and mouth.

5. Energizer

This exercise relaxes the muscles of the body. As a result, the level of oxygen in the blood rises, the muscles of the neck and shoulders relax, and the flow of blood increases. cerebrospinal fluid in the central nervous system. Exercise helps to wake up the whole body, especially after tiring work at the computer or long sitting.
To perform this exercise, place your hands on the table in front of you. Tilt your chin towards your chest. Feel the stretch in your back muscles and the relaxation in your shoulders. WITH deep breath tilt your head back, arch your back and open chest. Then exhale, relax your back again and lower your chin to your chest.
If you perform this exercise for 5-10 minutes, it stimulates and increases concentration. The body makes a movement that activates vestibular apparatus, "awakens the brain", relaxes the shoulder girdle. And this improves hearing and increases oxygen circulation, thereby facilitating the functioning of the nervous system. This is another indispensable exercise when working at a computer. After it, we feel active, full of energy and ready to generalize our thoughts.

Each of us periodically experiences a feeling of anxiety, anxiety and fear - this is one of the aspects of our mental activity. But adults have experience and knowledge that often help to rationalize what is happening and reduce the intensity of experiences. Children do not understand much and experience much more acutely. Often, what frightens a baby may seem like a trifle to an adult. But the feeling of fear makes the child experience really strong emotions that can instantly take over his entire small world.

If the baby complains that he is afraid of something, this is not a reason for ridicule or panic, but rather an occasion to think and talk with the child, try to find out the reason and then decide on next steps. Most childhood fears are temporary. timely detection fears by adults and the right attitude towards them will soon disappear without a trace. There are, of course, such fears (neurotic or obsessive) that impede the normal life of the child, interfere with his development and adaptation, and apply to all areas of life - in this case, it is better to seek help from specialists.

What are childhood fears?

Fear is a feeling that arises in response to the impact of threatening factors, which is based on the innate instinct of self-preservation. Psychologists identify two basic threats that cause a feeling of fear - threats to life and life values person. The specificity of children's fears lies in the fact that, as a rule, they are not directly related to the actual threat. Children's fears are based on information that children receive from nearby adults and pass through the prism of their vivid fantasy and imagination.

Causes of children's fears

The most obvious cause of children's fears is a traumatic situation experienced earlier. For example, if a child is bitten by a dog, there is a good chance that he will be afraid of dogs in the future. If parents intimidate the baby with fairy tale characters in an attempt to achieve their own goals, the child may be afraid to be alone or in the dark. The basis for the formation of fears is also the general anxiety of the immediate environment, which transmits to the child great amount prohibitions and set to fail. Mothers and grandmothers often warn children with phrases: “Caution! Otherwise, you will fall, hurt yourself, break your leg.” Of these phrases, the child, as a rule, perceives only the second part. He does not yet fully understand what he is being warned against, but he is filled with a feeling of anxiety, which can develop into persistent fears. Excessively emotional discussion by adults of various incidents and natural disasters, focusing on the fact that danger can lie in wait at every step also does not go unnoticed by children and is a fertile ground for fears.

There are not so obvious reasons, which may underlie children's fears:

1. Overprotection
   Children living in modern metropolis, often subject to excessive parental care, they constantly hear that danger awaits them at every corner. This makes babies insecure and fearful. In addition, life itself in a big city is filled with stress and very intense, which cannot but affect the child's psyche in general, making it more vulnerable.
2. Lack of parental attention
   Due to the excessive workload of adults, their communication with children is often very limited in time. Live emotional communication is being replaced by computer games and television programs. Therefore, it is necessary to communicate qualitatively with the child at least a few hours a week, take joint walks, play, and discuss significant moments.
3. Lack of physical activity
   Absence enough physical activity can also cause anxiety.
4. Mother's aggression towards the child
   If the mother in the family system occupies a leading position and often allows herself to show aggression towards other family members, the emergence of fears in the child is almost inevitable. She is not perceived by the baby as an object that will protect and come to the rescue in any situation, so the basic sense of security suffers.
5. Unstable family environment
   An unstable emotional situation in the family, frequent scandals between family members, lack of understanding and support cause chronic anxiety experienced by the child while in the family. Over time, this can lead to fear.
6. The presence of psychological and mental disorders in the child
   Also, the cause of fear may be the presence of a neurosis in a child, the diagnosis and treatment of which is within the competence of medical workers. A manifestation of neurosis is children's fears that are not characteristic of the age at which the child is, or correspond to his age, but acquire a pathological manifestation.

Types of children's fears

There are three types of fears:

1. obsessive fears
   These fears the child experiences under certain circumstances that can cause him to panic. For example, fear of heights, open spaces, crowded places, etc.
2. delusional fears
   The presence of such fears indicates serious problems in the psyche of the child. Their cause cannot be found and cannot be explained logically. For example, a child is afraid to play with a certain toy, wear certain clothes, open an umbrella, etc. But, if you find such a fear in your baby, you should not immediately panic, you should try to find out the reason, perhaps he does not want to play with a certain toy due to objective reasons. For example, he could hit hard or fall painfully when he used to play with this toy.
3. Overvalued fears
   These fears are products of the child's fantasy, they are encountered in 90% of cases when working with children. At first, such fears are related to a certain life situation, but then they take over the child's thoughts so much that he cannot think of anything else. For example, the fear of darkness, which in the children's imagination is "teeming with scary monsters."

Age-related childhood fears

Psychologists identify children's fears that manifest themselves in a certain way. age period, are considered the norm, and eventually disappear with normal development.

• 0-6 months - Fear is caused by the unexpected loud sounds, sudden movements, falling objects; absence of mother, and abrupt changes in her mood, general loss of support;
• 7-12 months - loud noises can cause fear; people whom the child sees for the first time; changing clothes; abrupt change of scenery; height; a drain hole in the bathroom or pool, helplessness in the face of an unexpected situation;
• 1-2 years - loud noises can cause fear; separation from parents; falling asleep and waking up bad dreams; strangers; bathtub or pool drain hole; fear of injury; loss of control over emotional and physical functions;
• 2–2.5 years - fear of losing parents, emotional rejection on their part; unfamiliar children of the same age; percussion sounds; the appearance of nightmares is possible; changes in the environment; manifestations of the elements - thunder, lightning, downpour;
• 2-3 years - large, incomprehensible, "carrying a threat", objects, for example, washing machine; change in the usual way of life, emergency events (death, divorce, etc.); changes in the location of familiar objects;
• 3-5 years - death (the understanding comes that life is finite); nightmares; robbery attacks; natural disasters; fire; illness and surgery; snakes;
• 6-7 years old - fairy-tale characters (witches, ghosts); fear of loss (to get lost or lose mom and dad), loneliness; fear of not meeting the expectations of parents in school, fears associated with the school; fear of physical violence;
• 7-8 years - dark ominous places (basement, closet), natural disasters and catastrophes, loss of attention and acceptance, love from others (peers, teachers, parents); fear of being late for school, expulsion from school and home life; physical punishment; lack of acceptance at school;
• 8-9 years old - failure in games, at school; conviction of lying or undesirable behavior; fear of physical violence; fear of losing parents, quarrels with parents;
• 9-11 years - the inability to achieve success in school or in sports; illness; certain animals; height, whirling (some carousels can cause fear); people who carry a threat (drug addicts, hooligans, drunkards, etc.);
• 11-13 years old - defeat; unusual own actions; own appearance and attractiveness; sickness and death; sexual violence; criticism from adults; own insolvency; loss of personal items.

How to deal with childhood fears

Children's fears, which adults do not pay attention to, can result in negative consequences, such as problems in communicating with peers, aggressiveness, difficulties in social adaptation, neuroses and complexes. Therefore, it is important for adults to pay attention to the child's fears in time, to understand whether they have pathological character, and, depending on this, try to help the child on your own or seek help from a specialist.

For questions about children's fears, you can contact a psychologist on the portal "I am a parent" in the section "For parents" - "Question to a psychologist".

Consultation of qualified specialists on all issues of concern, including a psychologist on children's fears, children and parents can be obtained by the Unified All-Russian Helpline.

The first step in helping is identifying fear. This can be done during confidential conversation with the child. You can ask the child if he is afraid of specific things. This becomes appropriate only if the child has already reached the age of three years. The parent can gently and slowly question the child about fears, without focusing on any of them, so as not to lead to fixation and suggestion. During the conversation, encourage and praise the baby. If fear is detected, react calmly and confidently, because the child reads your emotional condition. So, if a child's fear frightens an adult, the child may experience even more. Ask the child to describe the fear, what it looks like, what he feels, in what situations the feeling of fear comes to him, and what the baby would like to do with it. As a rule, children happily agree to send him to the North Pole, lock him up in a high tower, and so on.

Another effective method- compose a fairy tale about fear together with the baby, which must certainly end with the victory of the protagonist over fear.

- a fun and rewarding activity. While drawing, you can have a conversation, ask the child about his fear and invite him to look for solutions. And upon completion of the drawing of fear, the sheet with the drawing can be burned, explaining to the baby that in this way you burn his fear along with the drawing, and he will not bother him anymore. Burning must be carried out in the form of a kind of ritual, constantly encouraging and praising the baby for how brave he is, focusing on how well he dealt with fear.

Great for dealing with fears dramatization or play- it is worth noting that the use of this method is widely used by psychologists. Children in the group come up with stories about their fears and, with the help of a psychologist, play the stories in the group. Further, parents can play the situation with the child again at home, but only if this does not cause him negativity.

It is important to remember that fears are inherent in everyone, and they should not be afraid. It is important for parents to learn to accept their children as they are, with all their fears and anxieties. After all, if a confident, reliable and accepting parent is nearby, it becomes a matter of time for a child to overcome fear. All that is required of mom and dad in overcoming children's fears is to be close to the child, be able to listen to him, identify the baby's fear in time, and find The right way dealing with this fear: on your own or with the help of a specialist.

Maria Merolaeva

Working with fears involves a complex set of human actions aimed at working out one's own fear in order to reduce its influence on the feelings and actions of the individual.

Success in overcoming fear depends on how effectively an individual person masters the methods, techniques and exercises to manage fear.

Psychocorrection and phobias

Self-improvement of a person in the fight against fears is facilitated by psycho-correctional work. Its specificity and content depends on specific factors:

• type of individual phobia(with what exactly it is connected; with what phenomenon of the external or internal world of the personality; how strongly the depth of its influence is manifested);
• features of the psyche of the individual(strength-weakness of the nervous system, distinctive features of character, specific features of temperament);
• surrounding social and physical environment(how favorable it is in resisting fear or in maintaining its harmful influence);
• motivation of the individual in overcoming fear(its strength or weakness, the success of achievements in the confrontation of phobias, etc.).

Working with fears

A collision with a phobia is often unexpected, which leads to a lack of strength and ability of a person to adequately deal with it.

In such a situation, preliminary psychological work with fears, which involves:

• active opposition to the very feeling of fear;
• taking advantage of the circumstances.

In adults

The consciousness of an adult is formed gradually, but not always in a positive and rational way.

When phobic disorders occur, a constructive response to a feeling of fear should consist of 4 psychological mechanisms:

1."Connection of Consciousness". It involves the process of awareness by the individual of his own fear and its characteristic features. The idea that fear and its manifestation is a common reaction, indicating (and warning) about dangerous circumstances, should be prevalent.

The characteristics of the hazard must also be clearly defined:

• its reality or unreasonableness;
• its probabilistic indicators and consequences;
• how to respond to danger and what skills (baggage of knowledge and skills) a person has to work with it;
• whether help is needed - from the outside or from the point of view of internal reserves psyche.

2. Presetting. Ahead of consciousness, the appropriate attitude to a frightening situation creates the foundation for a constructive response. Anything helps: emotional pumping of the personality “for courage”, setting life priorities and values, linking to positive moments. Even an elementary paraphrase of phobic terminology has a positive effect. “Fear” is changed to “excitement”, “struggle” to “overcoming”, etc.

3. action. By performing any manipulations and actions in the course of a phobia, a person learns the world of "me and my fear." In practice, the mood for the situation is realized, which can be compared to a phone call: we can endlessly listen to the sound of the phone, but we never know who called without performing an elementary action - picking up the handset.

4.Foresight as a prediction of results and consequences. In a certain way, foresight must precede both awareness and attitude or action. anticipating dangerous situation, a person considers any result as a positive outcome. Knowingly planning the development of "failures", it is possible to prevent them or learn the necessary lesson.

In children

Children's age is characterized by an almost complete lack of a rational approach to their own fears, anxieties and fears. In the first years of his life (5-6 years), the child is largely dependent on the family circle - both emotionally and energetically.

It is in the family that the formation of a worldview, values ​​and behavioral attitudes, as well as fears or general prerequisites for their emergence takes place.

Parents have a great influence on overcoming the fear of something at this age. Important mechanisms for this will be:

• talking with a child in the form of an explanation (what comes from, why you should not be afraid, etc.);
• joint actions to master reality(if something frightens the child, it is the authoritative parent who, by his own example, in common actions with the child, is able to influence the overcoming of fear);
• switching attention(game actions, interesting events and objects can reduce frightening impressions and emotions).

In children of primary school age, fears can be characterized by greater depth and strength than in the early years of development (when fear causes something unknown or new).

These years are characterized by:

• the final formation of self-consciousness(knowing yourself and your fears);
• transformation of anxieties and fears(their transition into consciousness and an increasing influence on behavior elementary school student and its general emotional background);
• having instinctive fears associated with self-preservation, and the onset of social fears (“school fears”: being late, earning the wrong grade, etc.).

The technique of working with fears uses approaches inherent in early age, but the emphasis is shifting towards awareness and understanding, the formation of positive perception and positive emotions.

In adolescents, the development and manifestation of phobias is associated with adolescence. Here the psychological mechanisms associated with social status, therefore, fears are specific:

• look bad in the eyes of peers (surrounding people in general);
• fear of failure (when writing annual tests, passing exams);
• fears of a communicative order (loneliness, loss of a common language with comrades, their indifference, speaking in front of a large number of listeners);
• fears of a more global nature (loss of loved ones, health, life).

IN adolescence you can apply techniques for working through fear, which have proven themselves positively when used - both for adults and for children. About it will be discussed further.

Exercises

Techniques that help to achieve effective results in working with fears can be divided into at least 2 autonomous groups:

1. Physiological tricks. Based on the mechanisms of the human body from the point of view of physiology: in the course of experiencing a phobia, the body produces adrenaline, which must be used up - better, for muscle work.

Here are the types of exercises:

• physical- push-ups and squats, jumping and running up stairs if we are in public place, it will be enough to strain and relax the muscles - the main thing is to reset internal stress;
• posture training- the exercise is aimed at relieving muscle clamps, acquiring inner self-confidence (you need to stand straight, straighten your shoulders, pull in your stomach and straighten your back, knees - sit down, then - imagine that we are dropping the "bag from the shoulders", feel yourself and your limbs in this position);
• breathing exercises- also help to relieve excessive tension and clamps in the body (meditation is one of the options for focusing on the breathing procedure, when inhalation, pause and exhalation alternate rhythmically).

2. Psychological exercises. Their varieties and variants are simply impossible to enumerate. The general focus is to pay attention to the mechanisms of mental actions and operations that help reduce a person’s anxiety, remove fixation on negative emotions, and obsessions.

You can stop at 2 universal approaches:

• art therapy;
• gestalt therapy.

Art therapy

The psychology of working through fears or phobias, influencing them through art in order to overcome them, is based on a simple pattern: fear can be overcome by working with it symbolically (as with a specific symbol) - by drawing it, depicting it with the help of actions, composing it from details, etc. Here a special therapeutic mechanism is involved - creative activity.

Some examples of exercises:

• drawing fear - abstraction: it is proposed to depict your fear on a piece of paper - using lines and shades, the drawing should be abstract, then you need to comment in detail on every detail and its meaning;
• drawing fear - materialization: fear is depicted on paper in an arbitrary form, then a destructive action must be done with the creation - crush and throw away, tear, burn, destroy by another arbitrary method;
• game procedure - "screen tests"(can be used not only for children, but also for adults): a scenario is invented where there is a main character - the winner of fear; fear itself (in the form of a negative character) and other roles that help portray a victorious plot - it is proposed to play a scene, performing each role in turn;
• thread of the story: a ball of thick thread or twine is taken; the beginning of the story is invented - for example, about the child Kolya, smart and kind, who seems to be all right, but there is fear ... - on this the ball is transferred to the child (the end of the thread remains in the hands of the parent), he must tell about fear and continue the story, passing the ball back; the narration (transmission of the ball) continues to the logical end, where the fear ceases to be intimidating.

In gestalt

Gestalt therapeutic direction in psychology is distinguished by a special approach to the situation of fears and phobias. Feelings and emotions should integrate the external and internal world of a person into a single whole - gestalt.

Any inconsistency is considered a violation of integrity, for example, between the feelings and actions of a person - as in the case of obsessive fear.

Exercises to reduce the impact of phobia in Gestalt therapy:

1. Figure and ground - the perception of a phobia. Fear and the circumstances accompanying it seem to change places, paraphrase. For example: “I am afraid of people (death, spiders)…” turns into “there is fear in me…” and as a result “I have an incomprehensible fear that does not depend on my will…”. Thus, there is an awareness of the specifics of fear as an integral process, its influence on the life of the individual, the accents and personal priorities change.
2. "The Game of Self-flagellation"- unification of polarities (opposites). Every person has ambivalent (contradictory) feelings and emotions. They do not need to be opposed - they are a holistic continuation of each other. Fear implies courage - a person can have both in himself at the same time. They need to be integrated: it is possible to build a dialogue with well-grounded arguments of one and the other side - fear and courage (I need fear to ..., I need courage to ...).
3. Focusing on the here and now. Experiencing fear, the individual sets himself the Goal - to realize the present moment as accurately and vividly as possible. You should not think about the past and the future, about someone pleasant or unpleasant. It is necessary to pay maximum attention to the present moment: physical sensations - internal and external, as well as feelings and thoughts. The exercise allows you to work with an understanding of the characteristics of your own fear, to experience unity with yourself.

There are quite a large number of techniques, methods, methods and technologies for working with fears. All of them differ in their specific features and are not universal for each individual person with a phobia.

Based on this, the means of confronting fears should be chosen by a person individually, depending on the characteristics of the phobia and personal and psychological characteristics.

Video: Art therapy technique

Children's fears are observed in every preschool child, and this is normal, since the absence of fear would endanger the very life of the child: fear, like pain, warns of danger.

Developing and expanding life experience, the child is constantly faced with new phenomena and situations for him, which at first alarm and frighten. Of course, fears of this kind are overcome with time. “I'm scared, but I'm not afraid,” preschoolers say.

But if a child experiences fear, then, of course, this can disrupt the normal rhythm of the child’s life, limit the knowledge of the surrounding reality, reduce and even paralyze the natural curiosity of preschool children. But fears in children arise most often when a frightening, unknown, unknown happens to a child without support from an adult, that is, it coincides with a feeling of helplessness and defenselessness. It is unlikely that a child who feels protected by his mother will develop a pathological fear of dogs in response to a warning that a dog might bite. But the same words uttered with irritation by the mother during a conflict with the child or spoken by a stranger in the absence of loved ones (in both cases the child feels lonely and defenseless) can give rise to neurotic fears.

Often children's fears are generated thanks to parents. Obeying a bad tradition, parents, seeking obedience, frighten children with all conceivable and inconceivable characters: Baba-Yaga, a doctor, someone else's uncle, a policeman, taking the child “back to the store”, etc. They, as it were, populate the world of the child with fears, denying him his protection and thus depriving him of the opportunity to feel safe.

Children's fears are understood as children's emotional reactions to a situation of threat (real or imagined) or to an object dangerous in the children's mind, experienced by them as discomfort, excitement, a desire to run away or hide. The primary emotion of fear is already observed in newborns. Then fears are socialized and arise as reactions to new objects and situations. Anchoring in emotional sphere child's primary fear expands the zone of his social fears, increases sensitivity to threat carriers. Children's fears develop with a lack of parental acceptance and warmth, when children do not feel protected. These children often develop fear of school.

The fears that arise in everyday life are better overcome in it. Good emotional contact with the child, the ability of adults to use the psychotherapeutic possibilities inherent in games and fill the most ordinary situations with healing meaning often turn out to be sufficient help for the child. Therefore, when working with children's fears, play, drawing, whispering, group and fairy-tale therapy are used.

Play therapy is closest to preschool children, as it is closest to reality and corresponds to the age-related needs of children in the game. During play therapy, children are given independence and the opportunity to improvise as a process of creativity and self-discovery. Spontaneous play relieves the feeling of tension and stiffness, expands the possibilities of emotional response, helps to recognize and overcome fear. It is important for a child to be able to express himself in a safe play situation, where he is in agreement with himself and his feelings and experiences.

Fairy tale therapy is based on fairy tales familiar to children. For example, playing the fairy tale "Gingerbread Man", the role of the kolobok is played by a child who runs away from home and meets with various characters portrayed by an adult. On its way, the gingerbread man must overcome a number of obstacles, for example, find a way in the forest, hide from a thunderstorm, cross a river, protect himself from the threat of an attack, etc. Here, in addition to identifying fears, it matters how far the child can go in his fantasy. In dependent and anxious children, the bun shows more and more anxiety as it moves away from home and a desire to return. In children with a tendency to independence and protest reactions, the gingerbread man makes a more distant "escape".

Art therapy - the activity of children has two types - this is modeling and drawing. Modeling has the same principles as drawing therapy, but drawing, as practice has shown, is a closer, more accessible and easily explainable activity for children.

The child is invited to draw their fears. Due to the conditional nature of their image, children can complete this task without much effort. Thus, they seem to transcend their fear, violate its inviolability and inaccessibility, neutralize the fear of fear in their minds. This can be explained as follows. Before the child can act fear, he has overcome the obstacle of internal tension, to become fully aware of the fear. Since the child realizes healing role drawing, because the topic was given by an adult, usually a psychologist or psychotherapist, then this task is involuntarily (unconsciously) associated with an improvement in the condition. In addition, the process of drawing a child is supervised, which means that during the analysis of the comments and the invisible support of a specialist working with this child.

Whispering therapy is carried out similarly to play therapy, where the child and the psychologist take on the role of some animal and play a certain situation, pronouncing actions and deeds, and the psychologist uses the “parrot” method, asking and answering questions in such a way that the child would like to hear the answer.

All of the above methods are carried out in a dyadic relationship: a psychologist - a child. Group therapy is carried out with a child in a group of children, where the child's problems are brought to the group and solved jointly, and the adult acts as a leader. Group therapy is carried out in T-groups in the form various games and exercise.

For example.

Game 1. "Draw your fear" (25 minutes).

Purpose of the game: Removal of fears.

Game procedure:

Children are seated at tables. The facilitator invites them to draw a picture called “My fear”. After the children draw the pictures, it is necessary to discuss what each child is afraid of.

Game 2. "Darkness" (25 minutes).

Purpose of the game: Removal of fears of the dark.

Game procedure:

Etude 1 . A child is chosen who is afraid of the dark. In the presence of other children in a brightly lit room, he is seated in the middle of the room for five to seven minutes, and the child imagines that he is alone. Other children may draw or play some quiet game. You can also organize a conversation with him: “You see, Seryozha is sitting alone and is not afraid of anything! Ah, aren't you afraid?"

Etude 2 . In a dark hole. A child who is afraid of the dark enters a dark room by the hand with a teacher for three to five minutes. He introduces himself as a "timid chicken" who has entered a "dark hole".

Etude 3 . The second time the child enters the dark room, imagining himself as a “brave duckling” (three to five minutes).

Game 3. "School for animals" (20 - 25 minutes).

Purpose of the game:

Remove fear of school.

From total number children are selected those children who are afraid of school. Each child, at will, chooses for himself the role of an animal (a hare shaking with fear, an aggressive tiger). "Animals" sit down at their desks, the "teacher" (leader) enters and starts the lesson. "Animals" behave in accordance with their role.

Game 4. "School for people" (20 - 25 minutes).

Purpose of the game:

Acceleration of adaptation to school.

In this situation, the school is presented as something bright, sublime, kind. There is a drawing lesson. Children draw the plot "School". One of the children plays the role of a teacher.

You can modify the drawing lesson, the “Teacher” draws a figure on the board (circle, square, etc.). Children redraw this figure. The "teacher" always praises those who have a good drawing.