How not to fall into a deep depression - basic tips and tricks. Invent your own personal traditions. We should be masters, not victims of our thoughts

Instruction

Start keeping a diary of your own successes. Write down even the smallest victories and moments when luck was on your side. If you are suddenly taken negative thoughts Be sure to read this diary. Perhaps this will give strength and help regain confidence in yourself.

Try to start your day with something pleasant. Do not nervously jump out of bed at the sound of an alarm clock or immediately run to your phone or laptop to check email, social networks, read the latest news bulletin. Better wake up a little earlier than usual, stretch, calmly clean yourself up, cook breakfast while listening to your favorite, and tune in to achieve high results. And during the day, do not forget to focus on positive moments and pleasant events. In the evening sum up and create rough plan the next day. This will allow you to see everything that you managed to do and what you didn’t. You will also gain planning skills and learn how to organize your time properly.

Take a look at your social circle. Try to contact as little as possible with melancholic or always dissatisfied people. Hang out with positive, optimistic people more. This will not only give confidence, but also lead to fresh ideas.

If you are tired of the people around you, start making new acquaintances. It is better if it is live communication, and not correspondence via the Internet and other means of communication. In some situations, the result of such a turn of events can exceed all your expectations.

Make time for quality rest. Learn to relax. At such moments, you should forget about business and worries. You can turn off your phone and other devices and devote yourself to your favorite hobby, enjoy the silence, read your favorite book, and so on. Soon you will quickly notice that your thoughts are in order, and your body is completely relaxed.

Live in the present. AT modern world Many people try to be in time for everything and everywhere. This is especially true for residents of large cities. They are always in a hurry somewhere, running, doing something, in a hurry, hindering someone, falling, rising again. And so every day. Sometimes it seems that they do not always know where they are going and why they need it. Hence - despondency, apathy and depression. Therefore, you should stop and think about what is really important to you and whether you are on the right path.

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The word "crisis" in Chinese is denoted by two characters. The first means "danger", the second is translated as "opportunity". A crisis is not the time to despair and fall into depression, but it happens that once in an unusual situation, a person is simply lost and does not know what to do. Financial circumstances no longer allow you to do the usual things or relax as before. In such circumstances, the main thing is to remember that money is not the most important thing in life, and learn to appreciate what you have. Many things that bring joy can be done without suppressing your desires and significantly reducing your costs.

Transfer your meetings with girlfriends from cafes and restaurants to your home. To replenish the joy of communication, it is not necessary to spend fabulous sums on gatherings in in public places. Look for interesting and unusual recipes desserts and invite your friends for tea. Show your imagination, it is not necessary to just sit and chat. You can do something interesting together - make a big shared photo collage or postcards to loved ones for the next holiday.

You can also be creative alone. Browse books or websites with products self made. Think about what attracts you the most. Maybe you love natural cosmetics and would like to learn how to make it? Or maybe you have accumulated a lot of different scraps, and you want to sew a funny patchwork animal for your baby?

Turn your hobby into extra income. Invite friends or acquaintances to do a manicure, if you know how; take up needlework or tutoring. Create a group on a social network with an offer of your services. Learn how to make the group popular and attract people to it. Creative hobbies develop imagination and horizons, in addition, they will bring the joy of creation and additional money.

If you have been affected by the sudden increase in food prices, do not lose heart. This problem also has several solutions. Go around all nearby stores. You may notice that your familiar products One store is cheaper than the other. Follow the promotions. Buy products at once in large packages, if it is more profitable. Go to the wholesale base. Often, the prices of products there are much lower than in stores. Buy your kids a box of seasonal fruits they like, like persimmons or tangerines. It will be cheaper and healthier than daily purchases of candy or chocolate bars with additives.

Do not deny yourself the desire to buy this or that thing if you need it. Remember about secondhand, stock stores. There you can not only save a lot, but also find an original thing in singular. See if your city has free fairs or one-day flea markets. On them you can get rid of your unnecessary things and take what you need. Try selling things you don't need on free classified sites or on your social media page.

Think of those who are worse off than you and offer your help. Good deeds always bring happiness and joy, remember this. Offer to pay for bread to a lonely old woman in the store. Feed homeless animals, make a bird feeder. Take things you don't need to a shelter or Orphanage. Remember, maybe someone from your loved ones needs help? You don't have to help financially. Give the child's things that your child has already grown out of to the needy. Make a delicious cake or cook some cookies and go visit someone you love. Visit relatives or friends. When you become open and kind to everyone, start helping those who need help, your mood will undoubtedly improve, you will become much happier and life will sparkle with new colors.

depression is mental disorder, which can provoke illness and stress. How hard you experience it depends on how you perceive and process this event.

How not to get depressed

If you feel the manifestation of depression, then first of all greet her. But make it clear that you are the hostess. Try saying out loud: “No matter what happens, I will not let anyone disturb my harmony and mood. Everything that happens is just emotions that I can handle.”.

All your next steps should not be connected with thoughts about the bad. Cry if you want to, but don't be in tears all the time. For sadness to go away, you need to act.

Do what you've always wanted to do: skydive, paint a picture, learn to drive a car. The main thing is to do what you really like. Turn your dream into a goal.

As strange as it may sound, depression is a great reason to reward yourself with gifts. Treat yourself to a trip, however small, depending on your budget. Being on the move and getting to know new places, you will feel the taste of life.

How not to get into postpartum depression

After giving birth, you may experience:

• constant apathy, lethargy;
• frequent mood swings;
• distance from husband, friends, relatives;
• loss of appetite, poor sleep;
• constant feelings of guilt and worthlessness.

How to help yourself postpartum depression?

• First, get enough sleep. Look for opportunities to take a nap when the baby is sleeping. To do this, simplify your life as much as possible, ask your mother or mother-in-law to help around the house for a couple of days, send your husband to go shopping. Don't take it all on;
• Second, don't try to do everything at once. No matter how much you would like to be an ideal wife, mother and mistress, you won’t be able to realize everything at the same time. It’s better sometimes you don’t have time to do some homework than start to disturb your psyche with constant problems;
• Third, take time for yourself. Organize some kind of entertainment event, such as meeting with friends in a cafe or going shopping. It is very important to be distracted from the thought of the child for at least half an hour a day;
• Fourth, learn to relax. If you have ever practiced yoga, you know the technique of psychological relaxation. Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes and breathe slowly and deeply. Try to stop the flow of thoughts in your head. Sit like this for at least 3 minutes.

If you find it difficult to cope with a depressed mood, try vector psychology. It is built in such a way that step by step you will get rid of longing, realizing your actions in accordance with the pleasure you receive. Take advantage of the developments of the visual vector, a system aimed at exploring your own "I" and increasing self-esteem.

How to avoid depression after breaking up with a loved one

Emotions of experience after a breakup are normal reaction organism. And what to do next? Let your tears flow first. They make it easier to move spiritual emptiness. After you have cried, calm down and think carefully about the situation. If people break up, then two are to blame. If you realize that you did something wrong, it will be much easier for you to build new relationships in the next.

Tell all the details to third parties. If you do not have close friends or relatives, you can contact a psychologist who will listen to you and help.

Take care of yourself. Of course, after parting, it is quite difficult to do this, but believe me, it is extremely necessary. Usually, outbursts of sadness overtake those women who have a lot of free time to sit within four walls and expose themselves to reflections about what is happening. Visit a beauty salon, change your lifestyle, go in for sports. The main thing is to be busy, and then you will simply have no time to be sad.

Never try to find a way out with antidepressants. If you find it difficult to cope with despondency on your own, it is better to consult a doctor. He will pick you safe method treatment and prescribe drugs that really help.

To prevent divorce from causing depression

Psychotherapists say that very often sadness comes after a divorce and occurs in two forms - mild and severe. AT mild form the person realizes that the break was necessary. And in this case, he can only expect bright moments from the future. In a severe form, a person is morally broken, it seems to him that there is only hopeless darkness ahead.

In the first case, you can just stay alone, sleep well, and then start life from a new leaf.

But sometimes it happens that such a mood can develop into a more severe form. For example, if close friends constantly remind you of a divorce, or if painful section property.

What to do to get out of this state?

Folk wisdom says: “If a person himself cannot change, he needs to change the situation”. This means that it is better to go at least briefly to new places where you will be surrounded by new people who do not know about your problems and do not remind you of them. If you can't travel, find a new hobby for yourself.

Of course, a person, being in sadness, cannot seriously get involved in something. But he can try to force himself. To do this, it is enough to define a specific plan of action and designate real terms. When you plunge your head into a new business, then feel the rhythm of life.

An active lifestyle and small household chores that will remind you of a divorce will help overcome sadness at any stage. If you feel like doing fitness, meet old friends, make new acquaintances. Thus, problems with divorce will fade into the background, and then completely disappear.

How not to get depressed from feelings of loneliness

If you feel lonely, and this feeling does not cause you anything but sadness, then you can use traditional advice psychologists.

First, learn to enjoy being alone. Tell yourself “it’s good that I can be alone, and no one will interfere with me”. If you still decide to mourn, then first make sure that the house is clean. Clean the windows, buy something new for the room, try to cook tasty dish take out the old rubbish. Check, after all this you just do not want to be sad.

After the order in the house is arranged, take care of yourself. Go to the beautician, to the hairdresser, go shopping and buy yourself something new.

When you come home and don't remember that you were going to be sad.

Find the phones of friends you haven't talked to for a long time and invite them to your place or make an appointment. Stop sitting at home and indulging in sadness. Even if all your friends are busy and do not pay attention to you, do not be discouraged. Find yourself a new hobby, then a lot of interesting people will appear.

The modern world is not simple. Every second there are thousands of events, both positive and negative: somewhere a person died, someone was fired from work, a loved one left, others were left alone.

The mood and feelings of a person are colored in dark colors. Surviving events is sometimes so difficult that a person simply falls into depression.

What is meant by depression? Depression is a mental disorder.

The condition is provoked by diseases, infections, stress, improper organization of sleep, nutrition and rest. The human psyche is weakened and injured. Depression sets in.

Like other illnesses, depression has causes from which the disorder begins:

• overwork;
• tragedy and stress;
• hypodynamia (sedentary life);
• lack of sun
• improper organization or poor nutrition;
• flu;
• migraine;
• uncontrolled intake of sedatives.

Watch your condition so as not to aggravate the situation!

Signs of depression

If you notice any of the following symptoms, lasting two to three weeks, see your doctor:

• isolation;
• unwillingness to do household chores or hobbies;
• fear, irritability;
• a sense of the gloom of the outside world;
• fussiness;
• delayed actions;
• inattention;
• high or low appetite;
• indifference to the opposite sex;
• insomnia;
• feeling of hopelessness.

When does depression come?

Life consists of many events, joyful and sad moments. Today we smile and rejoice in a new day, and tomorrow we grieve from the loss loved one.

Everyone has to deal with troubles, regardless of age and status. Not everyone is able to overcome the trials prepared by fate, sometimes grief drags on and turns into depression.

People are subject to frequent depressive states after parting, after childbirth, after divorce and from loneliness. Age category irrelevant. So, for example, parting with a loved one can be at 16 or 30. Let's take a closer look at these four reasons for depression.

Not always a person can get out of depression on his own. help restore emotional condition. Consider the types of therapy that are used by doctors and psychologists.

Consider methods of dealing with depression and stress. Features of psychological assistance.

Depression is manifested in a person by a lowered mood, a lack of satisfaction from previously loved things. Through this link you will find useful advice about how to overcome depression and return to life.

How not to get depressed...

After parting

One lets go of a loved one, taking everything for granted, the other is very worried. Gap emotional connection the first key to the Depression door.

Experience, emotional discomfort, longing for a loved one are the next keys.

The person begins to suffer strong affection, realizing that it's all over, and the person will not be there. He will no longer hug, no longer kiss.

There is a feeling of worthlessness. The question: “What to do next?” is spinning in my head. Psychological addiction absorbs from within. I don't want to let go and lose someone.

An abandoned person delves into himself, asks questions to which he does not find answers. Suffering and trying to feel sorry for himself. The pain burns the heart more. The more often he asks questions and closes himself from the outside world, the faster he approaches a depressive state.

To prevent depressive disorder after parting with a loved one you need:

1. Meet friends and family as often as possible. Try not to withdraw into yourself, open up to the world and new sensations.
2. Go in for sports. Sports help to get away from problems. A barbell and dumbbells will help to throw out aggression.
3. Get out into the park. Fresh air It will help you get rid of bad thoughts.
4. Plunge your head into the work. Thoughts about work will replace your thoughts about the object of desire.
5. Why not do some renovations. Changing the interior will help to forget the person and everything that reminded of him. Remove things that remind you of your loved one.
6. Change your look. Love yourself.
7. Eat foods that promote the production of the hormone of happiness. Eat fish, chocolate, honey, fruits.
8. Go to a concert, a museum or a movie.
9. Thank fate for the moments that you had in your life.

Do not burden yourself with stress and work, so as not to aggravate the emotional state.

After childbirth

A woman happily expects a child and becomes a mother. Not all mothers are aware of postpartum depression.

It seems that the heart should rejoice at the birth of a baby, but that was not the case.

Depression in women begins after childbirth. A feeling of emptiness, not love for the baby, resentment against her husband and loved ones, a sense of impasse, powerlessness and many other conditions and sensations haunt a young mother. Symptoms are noticed, but what to do in order not to fall into depression and prevent it?

A few tips:

• Get yourself together. You need to put the child in the first place: feeding, bathing, and other care for the baby. You are responsible for a new life.
• Put yourself in second place. Rest, eat well. Homework isn't going anywhere.
• Accept help from family and friends.
• Do not try to immediately become perfect in everything: take care of a child, be an ideal housewife and wife.
• Plan your day. By spreading things out over time, you and your child will be organized.
• Make time for yourself! Paint your nails, invite your friends, do your makeup and hair.

These simple tips help those with mild depression. There is also a severe degree of postpartum depression. Here you need to see a doctor. Effective treatment serious condition is the application medicines- antidepressants. Visit a psychotherapist.

Make every effort not to become depressed after childbirth.

After divorce

One of the tragic events in the lives of men and women is divorce.

It happens that one of the parties does not want to part, because it cannot imagine life without a soulmate.

It is this person who is included in the percentage of people who can become depressed after a divorce.

The death of a family is on the same level as the death of a loved one. Divorce causes great trauma to the psyche.

Depressed state, unwillingness to go out, drinking alcohol and others common signs The first phase of depression lasts an average of 2-3 months. In order not to aggravate the situation, you need to get up from your knees.

A few tips from experts:

• Get rid of bad emotions: cry, speak out. Give yourself a couple of days to get over the depression.
• Don't shut yourself off from the world. Communicate with family and friends. Accept help and advice, support.
• Don't look to meet former second half. Get rid of things and all other items that remind you of your loved one.
• Don't blame yourself. Both are to blame.
• Open up to new hobbies and activities.
• Make time for your beauty. Change your look and wardrobe.

Life after divorce does not end, but only continues. Know how to take the blows of fate correctly.

From loneliness

Unofficial statistics showed that one in three felt alone once. Loneliness brings sadness. Depression sets in. You can deal with this condition by:

• Try to enjoy your loneliness.
• Do a general cleaning in the apartment. Probably getting rid of some trash in the house, you will feel relief.
• Don't forget about yourself. Beautician, hairdresser and shopping should bring you to your senses.
• Chat with friends and family. Talk to old friends you haven't seen for a long time.
• Go to a fun place.

Prevention of depression

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How not to fall into depression and love addiction

Being great specialist on the way out of both states, often going hand in hand (in the sense that I myself often fell into them and often got out), I am able to answer something to people who turn to me for advice in similar situations. So, I decided to write a manual so as not to repeat the same thing to everyone many times.

That depression, that emotional dependence on relationships is, in fact, "deficiency disease." According to the Gestalt approach in psychology, a person is a needy being. And if any of the needs does not find an answer, the person will either try to satisfy it before whipping the foam, or become frustrated, fold his paws on his chest and crawl away quietly whining into the bushes.

Man, being open system, cannot be completely autonomous, it needs a constant exchange with the environment: it is forced to inhale oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide get water and nutrients and isolate them in a processed form, and also a person needs to give and receive human warmth, recognition, love. Without such an exchange, either exhaustion or stagnation begins, or both.

Perhaps I am inclined to think that love addiction (like all other types of addiction) arises as a response to a lack of fulfillment. fullness life energy comes from a lot of sources, but when a person cuts himself off from them, because he has forgotten how or has not learned to hear the signals of his body and subconscious at all, a vacuum is formed in him that needs to be filled. And, not hearing the voice of true needs, a person invents superficial ones for himself - he tries to satisfy his needy hunger with everything that is not nailed down - food, mind-altering substances, work, people.

And depression comes as frustration - when a person stops trying and gives up. Often both phases - the struggle for fullness with the wrong methods and the refusal to fight constantly replace each other, as in a manic-depressive disorder.

Not all needs can be replaced by others. By and large, not a single need can be replaced forever by prosthetic ones - sooner or later frustration will come anyway.

love addiction often based on illusions. For example, people often confuse thirst with hunger. And if the body needs water, and we give it food instead, the body will lag behind us for a while, because it will be busy digesting, but then it will still ask for water. And if this need is not satisfied long enough, the body will switch from signals of thirst to signals in the form of diseases. For example, most often headache- this is the cry of the body "give me a drink!".

The need to receive and give love is basic. It is at the very core of human nature, in the default settings. And in those that we do not have admin rights to edit. This has to be taken into account. You can’t push the need for intimacy by the fact that you have a life full of interesting events. Well, that is, for some time it can be done, but the need still remains.

And the fact that the need is sometimes painful always has its own reason and cannot simply be ignored. None interesting activities will not cancel the paradigm of choosing a partner, laid down in early, pre-verbal, childhood - at a moment that we do not even remember. What we are not aware of and with which we are not in contact has a power over us against which we are powerless.

Whether we like it or not, the strongest triggers (triggers) of unconscious partner choice are the qualities that we internally rebelled against when we were totally dependent on the people who looked after us. And if the main significant others in our childhood were cold and distant (or simply not warm enough), then when we grow up, our knees will give way from those who give us this familiar taste of rejection and abandonment.

There is hope behind this. And until this deception of the subconscious is revealed (that is, we are not aware of this mechanism and do not enter into a long-term program of abandoning such a scenario, we do not develop new habits), we will be a prisoner of this unpleasant affect.

That is, by projecting onto a partner our parents or people who performed their functions (it could even be a nanny), we strive to “correct” another adult who did not actually sign up for these correctional works.

The result is predictable: those who did not order changes for themselves, most likely, will not change.

And all attempts to bring happiness to another and do good to him will end in breaking his own head. And these subconscious processes are so strong that we can at least 24 hours a day do super exciting things, but even through these things we will think about how to format the person who is now in charge.

The only real option is to somehow change - to heal the trauma of abandonment. And this is to good psychologist who owns non-verbal methods - those that can influence our "ancient brain" - the limbic system: body-oriented therapy, psychodrama, biodecoding.

In addition, even non-psychotherapeutic bodily practices will help: osteopathy, yoga, rebalancing, visceral massage, Thai and Tibetan massage (ku-nye) and the like. As Wilheim Reich and Alexander Lowen have well explained, unlived emotions are imprinted as blocks in the body: in muscles and other tissues. And by releasing this tension, we give vent to blocked emotions, healing them.

From a neuroscientific point of view, our susceptibility to stress depends on the quality early care. The more body-to-body contact and loving relationship we had with mothers in the first place, the more our brains "got used" to serotonin and dopamine and the better it coped with the elimination of cortisol.

If our parents did not protect us from emotional upheavals and we did not receive enough attention, then the level of cortisol becomes habitually high. And in adulthood the balance of neurotransmitters will be calibrated to the pattern that the brain had in infancy. In simpler terms than less love and worries we received in childhood, the more prone we will be to depression and the less stress resistant.

But this, fortunately, is not a verdict. Even if you had emotionally detached parents, thanks to the wonderful brain quality of neuroplasticity, you can change your neural circuits yourself. If childhood was not easy, it simply means that you will have a little more work than those who are more fortunate.

non-verbal psychological techniques, bodily practices, meditation. Verbal, of course, is also useful, because it helps to establish connections between the cerebral cortex and the subcortex, which helps to better understand and be in touch with your feelings, and this is already the first step to meeting needs.

Technique has also helped me a lot. postpartum swaddling which the doula did for me for almost 7 hours. Despite the fact that I gave birth already 12 years ago, they did it to me as an experiment, and I can say that it will work for completely nulliparous, and even for men.

In general, if very briefly, then the way out of addiction and depression lies through the restoration of contact with feelings as with the language of needs and through the satisfaction thereof.

Switching, willpower, whatever - if it works, it's only temporary. Just like a painkiller only temporarily removes the symptom, but does not solve the problem. Only by learning to recognize and recognize feelings, and through them - to find out what our main deficits are, can we part with these phenomena for good.

P.S. About the physiological and other aspects of self-help in depressive states read in this public a little lower.

I really don’t want to get back into the working rhythm and wrap myself in sweaters, fleeing the cold. But nature does not adapt to us - which means that several up-to-date advice to avoid the autumn blues!

Buy bright things

Read positive books

Find your drink

Keep yourself busy with something

Invent your personal traditions

Arrange unloading minutes

Make movie nights

Become a star!

Well, these are all tips for avoiding autumn depression. Maybe you have your own ways? Share them in the comments!