Can a child's own elder sister be the godmother! What is needed to baptize a child? Can my own sister be my daughter's godmother if I am her son's godmother

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Date: 14.09.2014 13:06:00

Margarita, Naberezhnye Chelny

Can a child's own elder sister be the godmother!

Protodeacon Dmitry Polovnikov answers

Hello! Tell me, please, can a child's own elder sister be the godmother?

Dear Margarita, the first and main requirement is the undoubted Orthodox faith of the godfather. After all, a godfather is the person who must teach his godson or goddaughter the basics of the Orthodox faith, give spiritual instructions. Accordingly, a minor cannot be a godmother. Usually, godparents are advised to become at least 14-16 years old. The godparents have an enormous responsibility for the spiritual upbringing of their godchildren, for they, together with their parents, are responsible for neither before God. Godparents are obliged to teach their godchildren to resort to the saving Sacraments of the Church, mainly confession and communion, they must give them knowledge about the meaning of worship, the features of the church calendar, the grace-filled power of miraculous icons and other shrines. The godparents must accustom those taken from the font to attend church services, fast, pray, and observe other provisions of the church charter. But the main thing is that godparents should always pray for their godson. Before this responsible role, godparents can confess and take communion at a church service, although this requirement is not necessary. It’s good if the godfather learns the prayer “Our Father” and the Creed by the day of christening.

Baptism is the most significant event in the life of every Orthodox person. And of course, you need to responsibly approach the choice of godparents. After all, they are the second parents, and play an important role in human life. There are many superstitions about godparents. And many are wondering: who can be a godfather and who is not. Let's try to answer the most frequently asked questions on this topic.

Can children be godparents?

According to church rules, children from the age of seven already bear full responsibility for their actions. They are no longer allowed to take communion without confession. Therefore, if a child is sufficiently churched, he can become a godfather. But when choosing a godparent, think carefully. The godmother or father must educate their godson in the Orthodox faith, and the child himself is only learning the basics of Orthodoxy. Still, it is better to choose an adult, accomplished person as godparents. After all, if something happens to the child's blood parents, the minor will not be able to take responsibility for the godson. If you still decide to take a minor as a godparent, then it is better that it be a child who has reached the age of 15.

Can there be one godfather?

There are situations when baptisms have already been scheduled, an agreement has been made with the priest and guests have been invited, and one of the godparents cannot be present at the baptism. Or you could not find a second successor at all. How to be in such a situation? The Church allows baptism with one godfather. The second can be recorded in absentia in the baptismal certificate. But there is one important point here. When a girl is baptized, a godmother must be present, and for a male baby, a godmother. During the sacrament, the godfather (of the same sex as the child) will pronounce on behalf of the baby a vow of renunciation of Satan and union with Christ, as well as the Creed.

Can a sister be a godmother?

If a sister is a believer, an Orthodox person, she can become a godmother. But it is desirable that the godmother was already an adult enough, because she will have to bear responsibility not only for herself, but also for her godson. Many who have older sisters take them as godparents. After all, no one will take care of the godson as much as a native person.

Can an ex-husband be a godfather?

It's more of a moral issue. If you have excellent friendly relations with your ex-husband, and he is not the father of your child, he can become a godfather. But if your ex-husband is the birth father of the child, then he cannot be the godparent, since the natural parents cannot be the godparents of their child. Well, again, the godfather becomes practically a relative, so discuss with your current husband if he would not be against your close relationship with your ex-spouse.

Can there be a godmother's wife?

The godfather's wife cannot be a godfather if it is about the same baby, since the church forbids spouses to be godparents of one child. During the sacrament, they acquire a spiritual connection, which means that there can be no intimate relationship between them.

Can a brother be a godfather?

A sibling or cousin can become a godfather. The Church does not forbid close relatives to be godparents. The only exceptions are the parents of the child. Grandmothers, brothers, aunts and uncles can be godparents. The main thing is that these people be Orthodox, baptized, and responsibly approach the duties of godparents. That is, to teach a child the basics of Orthodoxy and educate him as a believer, an honest and decent person.

Can a husband and wife be godparents?

A woman and a man during the rite of baptism become spiritual relatives, which means they cannot be married. Because marriage implies physical intimacy, which cannot be between spiritual parents.

If the godmother and the godmother are spouses, they are forbidden to participate in the sacrament of the baptism of one child. Moreover, a man and a woman cannot baptize the same child if they only plan to marry. If they nevertheless become godparents of one baby, they will have to give up close relationships in favor of raising a godson.

Husband and wife can baptize children from the same family. A man can become the godfather of one child, and the wife of another baby.

If a husband and wife unknowingly become the recipients of one child, the spouses need to contact the ruling bishop. From the current situation, as a rule, there are two ways out: recognition of the marriage as invalid, or the spouses will be assigned penitimia for a sin committed out of ignorance.

Who definitely can not be a successor?

Before choosing godparents for your baby, you need to know who the church unequivocally forbids to take as godparents:

- the birth parents of the child;

- spouses;

- not baptized and atheists;

- people of other religions;

- monks;

- mentally retarded people;

- sectarians.

The choice of godparents is very important. And here you need to be guided primarily by the interests of the child, and not your own. Often, the best friends or “necessary” people are chosen as godparents, without really delving into how much a person is churched.

If you want your child to be brought up in the Orthodox faith, choose only believers who know prayers and regularly attend church services. If people do not attend the temple and believe, as they say on a case-by-case basis, then there is great doubt about their serious attitude to the sacrament and their duties.

It often happens that the paths of people diverge, and the godfather cannot take part in the upbringing of the godson. But he still bears responsibility for this child, so the beneficiary must pray all his life for a godson or goddaughter.

Number of entries: 224

Hello, can a cousin be a cousin's godmother

Stepan Kornienko

Hello Stepan! Yes, this is possible if the goddaughter is a baby (since adults do not require godparents), and the godmother is more than 14 years old (because the godfather is obliged to be responsible for the baby and teach him the faith).

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

If, out of ignorance, I became the godmother of my daughter (9 years old), can this be corrected? Or do you want to divorce your husband?

Natalia

Hello, Natalia. Excuse me, but what did the husband do wrong? Well, you, of course, acted frivolously, probably, you didn’t pass the catechization, you didn’t consult with the priest. Now you know that it is impossible to be the successor of your own daughter, repent of this, confess and live on. And your daughter simply does not have a godmother, that's all. But it's not fatal either. You, most importantly, build the Temple of God in your heart by forcing yourself to live according to the Commandments of Christ. These Commandments are contained in the Gospel, but the savage rules that gossips pass from mouth to mouth are taken from some other gospel, not ours. God help you.

Priest Alexander Beloslyudov

Bless, father. I wanted to know about my son's baptism. He is already 3 years old, but there is no candidate for the godfather. Is it possible to baptize a child only with a godmother? I don’t want to take on the role of a father anyone, but there is no other option. And I really want to baptize my son.

Martha

Hello Marta. If I write to you what I personally think about the baptism of a child in the absence of a godfather, it will not matter. You will still need to go to your temple and resolve this issue with your priest. So it’s better for us not to waste time in vain, but to take up a practical solution. Go to the temple and present your problem to the priest who will baptize your son. As he says, do so. God help you.

Priest Alexander Beloslyudov

Father, I am very worried about the question, if you can answer me please. 25 years ago, we decided to baptize our children (daughter was 3 years old, and son 13 years old), we didn’t have godparents and we decided to go to the Pokrovsky Church to ask if it was possible to baptize without godparents. I don’t remember everything in detail now, maybe we said something wrong, they answered us: baptize right now, we are waiting for you. We do not exonerate ourselves of guilt, but then we did not know that a husband and wife do not have the right to baptize their children. After I began to go to church, I began to go to church more and more often, perform the sacraments of the church: confess, take communion. Then I found out that this was a big sin, I repented of this sin, told the priest everything how it all happened, and asked who we were to our children after all, godparents or not, he said - I don’t know, and that we need to repent now all life. I will repent until the end of my life, as long as the Lord will let me go, but what should I do, I don’t know what, I should divorce my husband, but I love him, we have lived with him for almost 40 years, in our life we ​​had big problems with my son, if we hadn’t been together, we probably wouldn’t have coped with everything that happened. What to do, I think with a shudder that I will have to part with my husband. What to do now, knowing this sin, I no longer have the right to proceed to the sacraments of the Church. I have been observing all the fasts for almost 10 years now, I try to be sure to confess and take communion during fasting, how can I now without these sacraments? My husband and I wanted to get married, my husband had faith in God, but he was far from the Church, now he began to come to the Church, began to go to church. I ask for your answer.

Olga

Hello Olga. It's great that you're in the church. Bless your marriage and live happily ever after. I don’t know what and how was done a quarter of a century ago, but the fact that you ARE NOT the godparents of your own children is absolutely certain. Get this nonsense out of your head. And the idea of ​​a divorce, only a madman could suggest to you. I'm just amazed where our people get all these savage rules from? Maybe they make up their own minds? Well, your children do not have godparents, this is also not a reason for sadness. There are many cases when whole families were baptized without godparents. And in the time of Prince Vladimir, when the whole state was baptized, who then had godparents? They brought all of Kyiv to the Dnieper and baptized them. So calm down and move on. Each of us has a lot to work on. God help you.

Priest Alexander Beloslyudov

Hello. We chose godparents for our daughter. Before the christening, both were at a preliminary conversation with the priest. But on the morning of the Sacrament, the man whom we wanted to be godparents became very ill and could not be present. His name was written on the baptismal certificate, but, as far as I know, he is not considered a godfather, since he was not present at the Sacrament. Is it so? He considers his daughter a goddaughter, pray for her. Can we tell our daughter that he is her godfather? Thank you!

Julia

Julia, godparents have a great responsibility before God for their godchildren. Godparents must always pray for their godchildren. They must educate them in the Orthodox faith, tell them about Orthodoxy. The godparents themselves must regularly go to church, confess and receive communion. Life must be led piously. Godparents are those who actually attended the baptism, and not in absentia. That man is really not actually the godfather of the child. he was not in the church at the time of the baptism. But no one can stop him from praying for the child and taking part in her Orthodox upbringing.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Hello, my sister is 20 years old, she is not baptized, now she wants to be baptized, and wants me to be her godmother. Q: Can a sister become a godmother to a sister?

Vika

Hello Vika! Before being baptized, your sister must go through catechumens in the temple where she will be baptized. At these talks, they will talk about the foundations of our faith and the sacrament of baptism. When we baptize infants, they themselves cannot consciously answer the questions of the priest, renounce Satan and testify to their faith in Christ, the godparents do it for them. They take responsibility for the fact that the child will grow up in Orthodoxy. For an adult who is being baptized, godparents are not needed, because he himself can be responsible for himself.

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

Hello. I am an adult, 19 years old. I am Kazakh by nationality, but I consider myself more Russian, because I am a mestizo (Russian mother, baptized). There is a strong desire to be baptized, to be cleansed... What do I need to do for this? I have never been to church. Is it possible to be baptized secretly, i.e. alone, or should someone be close? Do I need godparents or is it optional? And, based on the nation, is there anything wrong with that?

Irina

Hello Irina. Let's start from the end. First, Christianity has no national affiliation. I myself am from Alma-Ata, and I have many Kazakh friends. In the parish where I serve, there are Kazakhs, Tatars, Georgians, and Yakuts. Everyone feels great and does not experience any discomfort. Don't even think about it. Secondly, you don't need godparents, you are already a big girl, you are responsible for yourself. But, you need to acquire the most basic knowledge about the essence of Christianity. It would be best to find a temple where catechism talks are held with those preparing for baptism, and be like them. No book can replace a living word, especially if the catechist has at least a little bit of spiritual experience, sincerely wants to help you and knows how to connect cases. But, if you don’t find it, don’t despair, there are good materials on the Internet - both on our website:, and on the website http://predanie.ru/, prepare yourself. Then go to an Orthodox church and sign up for baptism. God help you.

Priest Alexander Beloslyudov

Hello, father! I have a question. We baptized our daughter at the age of almost 3 years. As far as I know, at baptism, the person being baptized is given a baptismal name. The daughter's name is Julia. But the priest did not give her any baptismal name. So he baptized Julia. And is the Sacrament of Baptism considered completed if the next day we did not go to communion, since the godfather could not come? Like, at the sacrament, as far as I know, godparents must be both. Can a child take another godmother? And in general, is it possible to rebaptize a person? Thanks in advance for your reply!

Oksana

Oksana, it is strictly forbidden to rebaptize a person - this is a grave sin. Godparents are not "appointed". You have a godmother, and she remains for life, whatever she may be, you should have thought about this earlier. At baptism, the name changes only if the name that the person already bears is not Orthodox. Julia is an Orthodox name. Your sacrament of Baptism is real, and there is no reason to doubt it. The child needs to be communed not once, but every Sunday, and it is not necessary that the godmother carry him to church, you can do this yourself.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Hello, tell me please! Can my wife's cousin be the godmother of our daughter if my wife herself is the godfather of that cousin's son? Can we give a different name at baptism, only so that the priest who baptizes, godparents and parents know it, in order to protect the girl from the evil eye, etc.? And we want to give the name according to the church calendar, will it harm the girl? Thanks for the answer. God bless you!

Vyacheslav

Yes, Vyacheslav, your wife's sister can be a godmother in this case. But all combinations with concealment of the name must be forgotten - this is paganism, unworthy of a Christian. If you want to change the name, change it, although it's not very clear why? But to conceal it is an empty superstition. And you don’t have to be so afraid of the evil eye, it’s better to be afraid of sin, because being in sin, without confession, without communion is already spiritual damage, the same spiritual harm that you mean by the word “evil eye”, only a person inflicts it on himself.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello. My mother baptized my daughter Nastenka little by herself. Now the daughter is 23 years old, and her godparents want to repeat the rite of baptism as expected, with their presence. Is it possible, how to do it right, and what are the best days? Thank you.

Alla

Alla, if your mother baptized your daughter at home, without a priest, then your daughter needs to come to the temple and supplement what has already been done with the Sacrament of Chrismation. Godparents are not required for this sacrament. If the priest baptized her, then everything has already been completed completely, nothing is needed, moreover, it cannot be added, it should not be baptized again. So the godparents will have to be somewhat upset. I hope they will understand, because if they really knew the foundations of the faith and the truth that baptism is performed only once, then such proposals would not be put forward. And so - what kind of godparents are they, since they don’t even know the basics of Orthodoxy ?! God bless you.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello, we baptized our son at 4 months in 2011, only the godfather was present at the sacrament, the godmother was entered in absentia, but later it turned out that she was not baptized. Is this a big sin, and what to do in this case? Thank you.

Victoria

Victoria, the woman that you wrote down as a godmother is not one, since the godmother must be present and participate in the sacrament of baptism - she cannot be a godmother "in absentia". I'm not talking about the fact that people should be chosen more carefully as godparents, since their main function is to teach the child the basics of Orthodoxy and educate them in the faith by personal example. It goes without saying that if a person does not go to church, does not go to confession and takes communion, and is not baptized at all, then he cannot really be a godfather to anyone. As for your specific situation, everything that happened with that “godmother” can be called just some kind of misunderstanding, you don’t need to do anything now, but in the future, if you have to baptize someone again, you need to more consciously approach such issues .

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello. Such a situation has arisen. I was baptized at the age of 16 25 years ago. The godfather died, according to the official version - suicide, although for relatives and friends, as well as eyewitnesses, this is not so. The godmother not only does not want to communicate, but even sued all my relatives and periodically threatened me. The godfather was my uncle. Well, God be her judge. What should I do, I can’t remember my name, under which I was baptized, they didn’t baptize under the present then. You can’t be baptized twice, and in church I have to know my name, there’s no one to ask. Thanks in advance.

Anatoly

Anatoly, during baptism, the name is changed only if it is not Orthodox. It has always been so. You have an Orthodox name. So, I think you were baptized with the name that you have, Anatoly, and there is no need to invent anything.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Good afternoon I was offered to become a godmother to a baby (boy), I love and respect their family very much. But I don’t know what is happening to me, I am terribly afraid of being written down as a godparent in a document. I'm afraid to shiver inside, honestly! I just have some kind of PANIC. in general, is it possible not to write me down, I would just be considered his godmother?

Daria

Daria, godparents have a great responsibility before God and before the child's parents. Godparents are obliged throughout their lives to pray for their godchildren, educate them in the Orthodox faith and tell them about Orthodoxy. Also, the godparents themselves are obliged to regularly attend the church of God, confess and receive communion, and live a pious life. The godmother must be present at the baptism. According to the church rule, godparents are recorded in the church book and in the baptismal certificate. This is just some kind of accounting document, and there is absolutely nothing to be afraid of. It is better to think again with full responsibility whether you are ready to fulfill your godmother duty.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

My sister wants to baptize her newborn daughter, but the godmother cannot come to the Sacrament. Is it possible to make her a godmother in absentia, that is, to consider her a godmother and enter it in a baptismal certificate, or is it necessary that the godmother be present?

Olga

No, Olga, this will not work: the godmother must personally attend the baptism, participate in it with the baby, utter renunciations of Satan and take the baby in her arms from the font. It is not possible to record directly.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

At my dream of a good day, the fathers died and stared dumbly. Chimozhna take the names of the fathers, the child of May 10 rokiv, the wines started quietly, the fathers do not remember, but I want to take the names of the fathers. You can take a cholovik and a squad, so I want to take it, so that the stench of the boules of the father's name.

Oksana

Shanovna Oksana, there is no tradition in the Church to recognize new goddamn fathers. Prote, if you know the Orthodox family, then you can ask them to help in the spiritual development of your child.

Archpriest Andrey Efanov

And who did you make godparents? We are going to baptize the child, but I can't choose godparents. They never disputed each other's choice, because if so, then it’s right)) the first was baptized by the husband’s sister, she didn’t know why he chose him, he wasn’t even a close friend.

Did you baptize your child and if so, at what age and if not, why? This is not very welcome, but not prohibited. Today I read that it was impossible only for the eldest daughter to be baptized by an institute friend and family friend who was a witness at our wedding.

Christening. Tell me, please, who knows why it is impossible to take a husband and wife (spouses in general) as godparents. And the last question, is it really possible to baptize no more than THREE children? Each other? No, they are originally from different genera (families). If your children - yes ...

And you are also mistaken that "IT" did not exist before you - your husband's friend WAS BEFORE YOU, right? everyone needs something from us! That you can’t just be friends, is it necessary to baptize children? Anyway, the godmother is the sister of the child’s father. So why couldn’t a family member be made ...

So - should we baptize a child, or should we first be baptized ourselves? Get baptized, why not? It won't be any worse for you than that. Will it be better? Then, God willing, Orthodox friends will appear who can become worthy recipients.

I baptized my first one, so they approached the choice of parents - mom from my side, dad from his side. He chose his childhood friend, I mine. girlfriend is married, so their marriage is excluded. and with the second, I wanted a second girlfriend, but communication was reduced to mini, to children, why not?

about christening. in our country, the wife of the godfather dealt seriously with this issue: what is possible, what is not. But some things I remember: taking godparents from the same family at the same time (husband and wife), baptizing each other's children (I - yours, you - mine), baptizing more than one child at a time ...

Who cannot be appointed godparents. Choosing from friends or relatives of the one who will accept this honorable duty Baptism. 1. Is it possible to baptize a child without a godmother and a godmother? But she didn’t call her godfather, for some reason she was categorically set up that she needed only her own.

And even if you find another church for rebaptism (they say it’s impossible in the same one), etc., go around all church canons - are you not afraid to leave your child without an angel at all ??? I encountered this situation from a slightly different angle: my friend also ...

off-baptism. Girls! Tell me, who knows whether it is possible to be godparents to a husband and wife. At the wedding, there must be either unmarried / unmarried spouses with a witness, or a married couple.

Choosing godparents for your child is a very important moment in the life of any family. Indeed, in Orthodoxy, with such sacred rites of Baptism, a parent is appointed for a child for moral and Orthodox education. Therefore, as a godmother, they often want to see a close and dear person - the mother's sister or the baby's aunt. Let's see if it is allowed to take your sister as a spiritual mother?

• necessarily Orthodox Christians;
• preferably church people who will instill in their future godchild the right spiritual upbringing, ready to take him to church and stimulate the desire to grow in the Orthodox faith;
• pregnant women, despite all sorts of superstitions;
• unmarried women.

• Mother and father of the child.
• People who are related by blood cannot simultaneously become godparents to one child.
• Monks and nuns.
• Those who profess a different religion are not Orthodoxy. In other words, infidels.
• Spouses will not be able to become a godfather and mother for one child.
• Persons who consider themselves unbelievers.
• Girls under 13 and boys under 15.
• People who are in relationships and plan to legitimize them. After all, an intimate relationship between godparents is not allowed, after the sacrament they are connected only by spiritual kinship.
• Immoral persons or mentally ill people.
• A person of the same sex as the child, if it is planned to choose only one recipient for the baby.

This list does not include the sister of the parents in any way, so there are no obstacles to taking your sister as a godmother to a child. Act based on reasonable arguments, listen to your inner voice, choose with your heart!

The godmother after the Sacrament of Baptism can be called a "family member." Therefore, if you do not want to acquire new "relatives", then it would be quite an acceptable decision to take your sister as a successor, there are no prohibitions on this matter. The main thing is to take into account the above qualities of a person.