"Your child has cancer." A touching story of Inna Kurs. “It happened when everything in life was just beginning to take shape.” The story of one cancer patient Stories of cancer patients as they learned

My father has always been a strong man. He served in the Northern Fleet, on a nuclear submarine. Then he served under a contract in a closed military town, the name of which will not tell you anything. Completed the contract, retired. Our family bought a nice apartment in a new building under the program of military certificates. It seemed that life began to unfold in a new way, but suddenly grief came to our family. After one of the medical examinations, a slight darkening was revealed in my father's left lung, he was sent to the regional center for additional examination, so for the first time in our house the terrible word "oncology" sounded. Surgery was prescribed as a treatment, and the affected lobe of the lung was amputated. You should have seen this scar ... From the shoulder blade almost to the nipple. But the military, even the former, scars are not a hindrance. Of course, repeated examinations were scheduled, and about a year after the operation, again like thunder - “oncology”, “relapse”. Metastases spread throughout the body, endless, debilitating, but almost nothing decisive courses of chemotherapy began. It is very scary - to see how your loved one is fading away and not be able to help absolutely nothing. It was the scariest period of my life. Father coughed up blood, sometimes lost consciousness, and then a rescue ambulance flew to us again and again. A low bow to all the guys fastmen. And how many injections were made, it is simply impossible to count, the stomach, legs, buttocks acquired an eerie blue-black color. And then the father left for another course of chemotherapy. Before leaving the house, he said to his mother - "I think I'm going there for the last time." Nothing can express the pain that takes possession of you when you talk on the phone with a loved one and hear how hard it is for him to breathe, how he is constantly sick and vomits. My father never returned from this trip. The night before we were discharged, we received a call from the hospital saying that he had passed away. Words are unable to contain that despair, that hopelessness that came at that moment. We all knew what oncology leads to, but it is impossible to prepare for the outcome, it always comes suddenly.
My father has been gone for more than a year and a half. He often dreams of me at night. Once I dreamed that we met with him in the cemetery, near his grave. He was all so light, as if weightless. We hugged tightly then and I kept sobbing, and he tried to calm me down. I also woke up from tears, for the first time in my life I sobbed in a dream and for a long time I could not stop.
I miss him so much and always will.
Damn oncology.

Unfortunately, the danger lies in wait for cancer patients not only when they feel very bad, but also when they feel better and begin to show some activity.

In this article, I want to give examples of three stories of cancer patients to illustrate the dangers that await patients when they get better.

Story one

Man, 73 years old

Cancer of the sigmoid colon with metastases to the liver and spine

His relatives turned to me a year ago when they refused to treat him in a hospital, saying that he had only 2-3 months left to live.

The patient was in severe depression.

He refused to eat, there was a very strong anemia.

He did not get up all the time while I was watching him, he could only rise on his hands on the bed.

Treatment

During the work with him, anemia was overcome. The patient was taken off morphine, and only 200 milligrams of tramadol was included in his analgesic regimen, which, taking into account the extent of damage to the body, I consider a very good result.

It was possible to stop a sharp weight loss, and the man began to gradually gain weight, although the last statement is subjective, since it was problematic to weigh it.

The patient was brought out of depression, and began to take part in the life of the family.

And it was too early to move without insurance ...

After 9 months, he felt able to lead a slightly more active lifestyle. He began to sit on the bed, asked to be helped to reach the chair, and sat there.

And he said that he really feels better.

One evening, when his relatives were not around, he got up from the sofa to go to the next room and take the remote control from the TV. Halfway through, he tripped over the carpet, fell, and broke his spine.

A week later he was gone, and there was nothing I could do to help him after the fracture of the spine.

Story two

Man, 63

small intestine cancer

Solitary metastasis to the spine

Multiple liver metastases

Complaints at the time of application:

• severe intractable pain

  rapid weight loss

Hospitalization at home was denied.

Treatment

Pain was completely removed after 12 weeks from the moment of treatment, and then the number of analgesics and NSAIDs (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) in the pain management regimen was reduced.

Overcame anemia, stopped weight loss.

Within 6 months, an objective reduction of liver metastases was achieved.

Beware of hypothermia and drafts

The patient went to his homeland in Armenia, where, despite the warm September, he caught a cold while sitting in the garden, and two days later he died of rapidly developing pneumonia.

Story three

Man, 65 years old

prostate cancer

Metastases in the pelvis

Severe pain that prevents a person from even getting out of bed.

Malabsorption syndrome, against the background of which there was a rapid weight loss.

Tramadol stopped helping, he was offered to switch to morphine.

Treatment

In the course of treatment, it was possible to achieve normalization of the blood composition. The patient was returned to tramadol.

Pain objectively decreased to the extent that the anesthesia regimen was revised twice in order to reduce analgesics and NSAIDs in it.

The patient stopped losing weight and began to gradually gain weight.

If the patient has been lying down for a long time, you should not get up without consulting a doctor

He felt much better and, without the knowledge of his relatives, he himself got up and walked around the apartment.

On the night of the same day he died. An autopsy showed that the cause of death was a blood clot.

Do not overestimate the capabilities of your body

I cited these three cases as examples of the fact that the danger lies in wait for a cancer patient even when he seems to have a steady improvement.

Relatives and the patients themselves should take into account such moments, and even when the patient has become better, before changing the established lifestyle, one must always consult a doctor.

Unfortunately, none of these three patients thought about the question - what will happen if he starts a more active life.

Not always the transition to the active state is a blessing.

If a person has been eating parenterally for a long time, and then he wants to eat food himself, you need to prepare for this.

If a person has been lying down for many months, and then wants to get up and go, one must also prepare for this. At least ask relatives to insure him.

If a person did not leave the house for several months, and then he felt better, and he wanted to take a walk, you also need to prepare for this. Beware of both hypothermia and overheating on the street.

The body, despite the improved blood counts and good health, is still very weak. And a trip to the market or a walk in the garden can cross out all the treatment.

And such crowded places as a market, a shopping center, etc. generally to be avoided. Even visiting relatives should be limited, especially during the autumn-winter period, when the flu is around.

In fact, a cancer patient, even in remission, needs to be protected like a baby. A cold or the flu virus can kill him.

Of course, I warned relatives that such problems could arise. Unfortunately, they did not take these warnings seriously.

The good news is that stories like this are rare. Most cancer patients, especially women, listen to advice and take care of themselves.

So that patients do not get into such situations, I wrote this article.

To tell the truth, writing an article on one of the TM sites has not been part of my plans until now. I registered with an opportunity somewhere in 2012, either to answer some article, or to ask a question to the author of it. I couldn’t do either because of read-only, so I haven’t logged in since then. Today in the mailing list I found a link to the article “Cancer. What to do about it and what not to do. Personal experience.".

What is this?

Section of spiral computed tomography.
Whoever finds the "blank spot" from the article below will get a pie from the shelf, for what they found, but two stupid radiologists did not find.

1. Prologue.

Once, leaving the gym, as it should be, decently warmed up and running home, as it should be for an “athlete”, lightly on a cold September day, I caught a cold. It's a matter of life. I must say that I have been catching a cold for the last 10 years for any reason, always and everywhere, and a cold always ends with a long, two-month-long cough. That's what happened this time as well. But work and business do not wait, so after traveling enough on business trips for a month and noticing that my cough was somehow not getting better, I turned to a Moscow commercial clinic that is considered very cool. Luckily the insurance was good. Long story short: they fooled me for a month or a month and a half, did a bunch of tests, two computed tomography (CT) scans, and began to vigorously treat me for pneumonia. Having tried all the lines of antibiotics on me and found out that for some reason they did not help me, they wanted to roll me up for the third CT scan, but by a happy coincidence they did not do this, but instead, along with the pictures, they sent me to a very competent pulmonologist. After carefully examining the pictures (*) and pointing his finger at the white spot between the heart and the right lung, the luminary said that “this one” should not be here.

Conclusion No. 1: the detection of oncology is largely a matter of chance and is often detected too late.

It cannot be said that on that beautiful day the world collapsed for me. No. Explanations were spinning in my head that this cannot be, because it cannot be in principle: apart from myopia and scoliosis, I am basically healthy; do not smoke and never smoked; I am only 28 years old. No, and again no, it’s probably something else, but the cough, well, yes, it exists, but it had happened 20 times before and nothing, it passed by itself. Here it is necessary to give a remark that while I was being examined and treated by stupid people from the clinic, I myself, as a person prone to analysis and (self) digging on the results of a blood test, as well as symptoms such as mild weight loss, fatigue and night sweats (the so-called B-symptoms ) also came to the conclusion that we can talk about oncology. Of course, with a negligible probability.

Conclusion No. 2: that doctors and patients are psychologically ready to accept any conventional diagnosis, but hardly admit the possibility of oncology

2. "Cut to hell without waiting ..."

Me: I'm here to you, dear name, to make a puncture with a thin needle (**).
-Doc: Uh nah... we don't do that. If you want a puncture, go to the oncologists, and here we cut it according to the normal. Yes, and whatever you have there, let's cut it off, there's nothing good there and you don't need it.
- Me: Umm... unexpectedly, but they told me about the simplest operation. Yes, and what kind of oncology, why should I go to them. Well, okay, if you need it, you need it. How will you cut it?
-Doc: Yes, we are all on fire! A small cut on the side, start the robotics, turn on the monitors and cut everything out.
- Me: Well, what to do: let's.
- Doc: Let's go. We have a queue here, hang out for three weeks and come. Just do a CT scan before hospitalization.

Having made another CT, they upset me. The “white spot” has doubled in a month. The preliminary diagnosis read the phrase “T-lymphoma”, which was unknown to me then. Googling the subject. My mood has completely deteriorated. Doubts about the essence of the spot disappeared, and the forecast was not encouraging. The question to cut or not, if it still remained at that time, somehow disappeared by itself. I remember how I counted the days until the moment when they will save me from this muck.

The moment has come. True, before immersing me in anesthesia, Doc said that the concept had changed a little: instead of a gentle operation by a robot, they would open me in the old fashioned way using the middle longitudinal cut of the sternum (i.e., approximately like a fish is cut). You will sign the papers later. It seems at that moment I asked the question “What about the robots?” and on that positive note, I was "cut off". And when they “turned it on”, I found out that now I don’t have a lobe of the right lung, a heart bag, and the nerve responsible for the movement of the diaphragm had to be “cut a little”. In addition, it suddenly turned out that such a seemingly insignificant bone from the point of view of the movement of a healthy person as the sternum, in fact, is extremely important for these same movements and hurts at the slightest manipulation of the hands. It still hurts, by the way.

True, there was reason for optimism: the tumor lay on one side on the aorta, but fortunately did not have time to grow to it, otherwise they would have cut off part of the aorta, which, you see, would be pretty bad.

The giblets, as usual, were sent to the laboratory, from which came a slightly more pleasant than before answer about the essence of the disease, namely the most "benign" subtype of Hodgkin's Lymphoma. The diagnosis was signed by some mega-professor.

Much later, when I became probably one of the most knowledgeable non-medical patients in the world, I learned that no one in the world treats lymphoma in this way (ie, by the method of complete cutting off). (***) But more on that another time.

Conclusion No. 3: Caesar's is Caesar's. Heard the keyword "oncology", go to the oncologists, but got to the surgeons - they will do what they are paid for.

(*) neither before nor after this incident, I have never seen a general practitioner who could read CT scans. Everyone reads exclusively extracts to pictures.
(**) so-called. fine needle aspiration
(***) To this day, I am tormented by doubts whether the radical operation was necessary or not. On the one hand, I was not completely cured, on the other hand, they removed the huge and main focus of the tumor and intoxication.

It's getting late and the light is getting dimmer. This completes the first of N series. Next time, if it takes place, I’ll tell you about where you need to go to never be afraid of horror films again, about the unconditional benefits of “N + 1 opinions”, and also about what a protocol in oncology is and how useful it is to get into it .

20-year-old Moscow student Dmitry Borisov has found himself in the spotlight of the Internet community. He was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer, which, even with a tendency to the disease, usually manifests itself by the age of 60. Thanks to social networks and the support of bloggers, he managed to raise about 1 million rubles for treatment. He now receives dozens of messages of support, and recently started blogging on the Ekho Moskvy website. Medialeaks spoke to the young man about life with cancer and the fame that came to him.

We are sitting in the corridor of the Herzen Cancer Institute. The hospital, it would seem, is not much different from the usual for many. People differ, diagnoses, and, of course, the general atmosphere.

Tell me, how did you find out about the diagnosis?

At the age of 4, I began to manifest a rare genetic disease - neurofibromatosis. There was a tumor the size of a small bump, which grew to a large size: it occupied the entire back, half of the chest, and the axillary region of the right arm. Against this background, around the autumn-winter of last year, another small bump began to grow under the tumor.

I did not attach any importance to this: well, the next knot has grown and okay - their appearance is typical of my disease. Soon the state of health began to deteriorate, apathy appeared. By spring, I already had a bigger bump. But at that time there was study, and you know how it usually happens with men - business first, and then health. By May, the bump was already the size of a small fruit, and one morning I simply could not get out of bed from the pain. Polyclinics began in May, and then the bump began to grow explosively - now, as you can see, it is already the size of a soccer ball.

What did the doctors say?

Few people have heard of neurofibromatosis - you come to the doctor, and they say to you, “I read about you at the university in a book.” In general, this is a benign disease, and when no cancer cells were found, I calmed down a bit, bought some painkillers and continued my studies and going to clinics.

Once I got to the Russian Academy of Medical Sciences to a good young surgeon, they sent me for an MRI, they began to find out what kind of monster was growing. Thought it might be a cyst or a fat cell. We looked, and the doctor says to me - what about the lungs? I say nothing, I have a normal lifestyle, last year they did an x-ray, so nothing should happen. Then I took a picture, and it turned out that I had metastases in my lungs. The specialists said that it looks like a sarcoma, but not a fact, an additional consultation is needed. Well, it started. I went to the Central Clinical Hospital, they did a biopsy. It turned out to be a malignant tumor. Transferred to the Herzen Cancer Institute. He was hospitalized, the tests were rechecked, and it was confirmed that the tumor was malignant - from the sheaths of peripheral nerves with a grade of G2.

That is, in fact, it is a cancer of the nervous system?

With a stretch, we can say that yes, nerve cancer, but to be more precise, it is still a malignant tumor from the sheaths of peripheral nerves of soft tissues. The strange thing is that usually neurofibromatosis behaves very badly by the age of 60, that is, I always thought that 40 years would be one hundred percent for self-realization. I didn't even imagine that this could happen. He believed that if something bad starts, it will be later. But, unfortunately, this happened now, when everything in life was just beginning to take shape in everything. And such an ailment is a rare genetic disease against the background of the rarest form of cancer. There is not a single center in the world dealing with this. That is, it is such a struggle with the unknown.

This fasting in Facebook shared by almost 2.5 thousand people. More than 1.7 thousand liked, 225 commented. The entire Internet is already following the fate of the young man. He admits that sometimes he gets tired of constant attention.

“Dear friends, a big hello to everyone!
My real name is Dmitry Borisov, I am a [already] 4th year student at the excellent Higher School of Economics, and this is really my page. I am a living, real-life guy of 20 years. As you already know, quite recently I started a new life, which I am not at all happy about and now I am doing everything in my power to return to the old life.

How do you feel about your popularity?

This, of course, is the support army. But sometimes I get tired of dozens of the same type of messages with the word "hold on." On the other hand, it gave me an even greater desire to live - now I have so many new interesting acquaintances. I’m also no longer sure that you need to flaunt your personal life, maybe I started it in vain. They sometimes write me comments like “so that you die sooner, liberalist.” And I get upset.

What else helps you the most to keep your spirits up?

I just try to perceive everything as a game of chance: the last stage - okay, it will be more interesting to win.

What was cancer for me? Something beyond my reality. The usual, measured, like jelly, life dragged on. Somewhere out there, someone was struggling with this illness, that is, such an incredible clot of grief was concentrated, such a tragedy played out that it is impossible for the average person to imagine that all this is one world, that there is no partition between these realities.
What did I feel at that moment? It seemed that he had gone crazy. Not in the sense that he began to hear mysterious voices or behave strangely. Rather, something similar to the experience of a just sentenced to death flickered.

What are the doctors saying now?

A lot of bad things. The documents were handed over to one of the best oncologists in the country and throughout Eastern Europe, and now it should become clear what type of cells there are - there are two options: one in which there is treatment, long, expensive, painful, but it is. At the second treatment simply does not exist. At the same time, no one is going to refuse me and they will offer various options for experimental treatment.

When will it become clear?

Most likely in 10 days, two weeks. Experts from Germany and the USA should look there. But in any case, the doctors said to do chemo, and such things are almost not susceptible to chemistry, which is very bad.

At the same time, as you wrote, you were prescribed a lot of chemistry?

Infinitely many. The fact is that there is a certain percentage anyway - cancers are very individual. And what remains if nothing else helps? Now I had the first course of chemotherapy, soon there will be a second one, and after it there will be tissue sampling, tests, they will see if the tumor has reacted.

What is chemotherapy in reality?

I thought that you were sitting in an easy chair, around special objects, that this was some kind of special ceremony. In fact, they just brought me a dropper to the ward - 4 cans are hanging, 4 are still with me, they said that they will drip everything now, it will take about 8 hours. They inserted a catheter into a vein. And they started pouring. One course is five days.

What were the feelings?

The first time I didn't feel anything. I was even a little upset - I expected some kind of hell. And the doctor says - wait a little longer. On the second day of chemo, I felt tired and started to feel nauseous. After that, I immediately went to bed, and at night I woke up from cracked lips, gums, cheeks stuck to the gums - dry skin and a headache began. The third chemistry - severe vomiting appeared, I began to understand that smells and tastes were changing, in general, it started in full. The fourth or fifth day is insane fatigue. You lie and do not understand what you are tired of. He opened the head, looked, he was already tired, you close it, you need to sleep. It was hard for me to even talk.

After chemo, you get used to the new you. You don’t know what you can eat: something has lost its taste, the other, on the contrary, has a terrible taste and immediately vomits. I remember that I went out into the corridor and felt such a range of smells and tastes - I generally went crazy. You smell the scents that no one else has. And he took his favorite perfume and immediately threw up. I thought it smelled awful, and it used to be my favorite cologne.

But after 3 weeks they promised hair loss, so I'll change the style a bit. I'm ready for this, for me it's just a change of image. It’s a pity only eyebrows and eyelashes, they say they also fall out, I will look like an alien. But it doesn't matter.

From a Facebook post: “What was I thinking? "B**". Somehow I thought at first and I think it is quite worthy for 20 years. It was already then that they went “too early”, “will I wait for my beloved from Vladivostok”, “and my parents”, “and my mother”, “friends, my poor friends and girlfriends”, “I didn’t have time to write a book”, and many, many, many things . The panic did not last long. After that, fear disappeared from my life. Yes, it's a shame, it hurts, but it's not scary at all. I decided that I really want to live. I want and I will.

What did you want at that moment? To be alone, to talk with friends?

Just keep on living. I am annoyed by films that talk about people who have diseases, and here they come off for the last three months. Nothing changes at all in life. A new stage is coming, I reacted to it this way. There were some stormy emotions, there was nothing like that, at least I can’t remember it now.

(Of course, I also remember these films. The same song from “Knocking on Heaven’s Knockin’ plays in my head, everything is so romantic. But in fact, we are sitting in a hospital, patients with stone faces pass by, silently next to them relatives are coming with packages—Olga Khokhryakova).

Are you talking to someone here?

The mood in the hospital is very bad. Mostly there are adults who have lived more than half of their lives, with families, businesses, and children. And they always sit so gloomy, although they have already managed to realize themselves.

How do you generally feel now?

Lousy. No, it’s actually normal, the main thing is to get yourself up in the morning, because in the morning everything that has accumulated during the night appears - headache, fatigue, nausea. It goes away in a day - you start moving, people come. Especially the people are very helpful. A friend came to me with good news - he got a job, and for two hours we talked with him about everything except the illness. And it really saves. You feel morally good, you are pleased and you forget about the consequences of the same chemistry, pain.

Has your outlook on life changed?

Yes, the outlook has changed a lot. I was always so serious, sad, death is a great way out, I thought. There has never been anything positive about me. Although for me it was difficult to say - in public I always joked. This is a great escape from reality. I felt all the tragedy of the world. And now I realized that I was probably wrong. I want to live terribly.

What will you do when you get better?

You have to rush somewhere. I will recover and I will travel a lot around the world. I would go to Northern Europe, Scandinavia to see.

Why go there?

The climate, firstly, my diseases are greatly affected by the sun, so I can’t stand the heat. Well, for me the main thing is that there is something to see. Because wallowing in the sea is not for me, I love smart rest, castles, mountains.

By the way, did you write about a girl from Vladivostok?

Yes, we walked for several months, she knew from the beginning that I was sick for life, but she immediately accepted it. No matter how long I lived, not a single person ever rejected me, it was just my inner fears. When my health problems began, I began to say that perhaps I would die soon. When this began to be confirmed, she went home. She lives far away and has an elderly mother. At first I was offended, but in fact there is nothing to be offended at. But if she was there all this time, it would be very cool.

Tell me what is the most important thing in life?

Health is probably the most important thing, and then a sober mind, friends, girls, everything will be fine in the family, work, study. The main thing is health. Although ... you can be a healthy and complete idiot in life. It's better to be a reasonable person, but with cancer, yes, it's probably better.

I don't like hospitals. Who loves them. But on this day, I did not have a heaviness in my soul, which usually settles after staying in such places. I had the feeling that I just went to chat with a friend - Dima, even being in an oncology center with a malignant tumor, charges with a good mood, captivating with his openness and directness. I was driving to the subway and thought about what everyone had, and everything would definitely be fine with him.