Communion after baptism: the meaning of the sacrament. First Communion after baptism. The servant of God, the baby, takes communion ...

(Reflection on the upbringing of the children of the priest Ilia Shugaev - a father of many children)

Children, like adults, prepare for Communion by fasting, confession and prayer. But preparing children for Communion is different from preparing adults.

0–3 years. One can say very simply about the preparation of children for Communion at this age: children are not yet preparing in any way. You can feed babies when they require it and come to the temple. And you can not come to the beginning of the service. At this age, children do not fast because they cannot fast. Toddlers have not yet fully learned to control their feelings and their behavior. For example, a child, entering the kitchen in the morning and seeing a cookie there, will take it, although two minutes ago his mother strictly reminded him that it is impossible to eat before communion. He understood this and easily agreed with his mother, his desire completely coincides with the desire of his mother. But here in front of him is a cookie, and a new desire arises. A child has two desires, but he still does not know how to manage them, therefore, as a rule, the last one wins. The child will eat this cookie, and will not be to blame for this. You can not demand from the child what he is not yet capable of. Therefore, the child can be fed before Communion at this age, if necessary. Closer to the age of 3, it is advisable not to eat before communion, but if the child accidentally ate something, this does not prevent him from taking communion. Special prayers before Communion with a child are not yet read. Obviously, there is no confession yet either.

You can come to the Liturgy 15 minutes before Communion. If the service in the temple starts at 8.00, then you can come with the kids by about 9.15. They came, in 15 minutes there will be Communion, they took communion, in another 15 minutes - the end of the service. A child spends about half an hour in the temple, so almost any child, even the most restless, usually endures this time in the temple. You just need to find out in advance in the temple where you will go, when it is better to come with your child for communion.

It is best for children at this age to receive communion every week. All Christians took communion just as often in ancient times. Now, due to the fact that it is customary for an adult to fast two or three days before communion, adults take communion somewhat less often: once every two or three weeks or once a month. There are already two fast days every week (Wednesday and Friday), and adding a few more fast days will be hard as adults. Since the children do not fast, they can take communion every week.

3–7 years. At the age of three, a child enters a certain transitional age, he grows up and already controls his feelings and actions. Therefore, from 3 to 7 years old, children take communion on an empty stomach. At the age of three, a child can be explained that it is impossible to eat before the service, and he can already stop himself at the sight of an accidentally left delicacy. If a child accidentally eats something, then he may not be allowed to take Communion, which the priest must decide, taking into account the age of the child, the churchness of the child and parents, and much more.

At this age, the child is also not brought to the beginning of the service, although a little earlier than the kids. At home, together with their parents, a child can read 2-3 prayers familiar to him. The child is brought to the temple 15-30 minutes before communion. Children can receive communion every week. Children at this age do not go to confession. Some children may quite consciously confess before the age of seven, for example, as early as six.

7-14 years old. At the age of seven, the next stage of a child's development begins. He becomes a small adult, so he does everything like adults, only on a smaller scale. For example, adults fast for two or three days, but a child must fast for at least one day. Adults read a complete prayer rule, and a few short prayers are enough for a child. And, finally, from the age of seven, children begin to confess. Further, as they grow older, children are getting closer to adults: they fast a little longer, read more prayers, and confess more seriously.

Therefore, at this age, the child fasts 1-2 days before Communion. From the moment when the child has learned to read, he reads special prayers for Communion. At 7 years old, you can read only 3-4 special prayers, and the older the child, the closer his prayer rule is to an adult.

Anyta

City: Pskov
Gender Female

Sent on 13.01.2010, 23:52

Anya, please share your experience, how do you manage to take communion yourself and the baby? What time do you come, with a baby, etc. ? It’s just that if we are with Mashulka, then we come closer to the sacrament itself, and then it’s kind of inconvenient to take communion herself. And Masha's whole service is hard. Or maybe it's just my "excuses"?

Bonnie

City: Pskov
Gender Female

Sent on 01/14/2010, 02:48

Anyta (13.01.2010, 23:18) wrote:

Erica, I'm sorry to interrupt, the question is probably directed at Bonnie, but I can't resist.

And try to take your son to communion on weekdays, when there are few people. And more often. Let him get used to the temple and the sacrament, he will already know what and how is happening. Gradually, he will love to take communion, kiss the icons, he will know the priests! Then, perhaps, a large crowd of people will not frighten.

Bonnie, the article is wonderful, bright and instructive! But there is another side to this issue. Carrying the baby to take communion, parents often forget about themselves (in the spiritual sense). Coming every Sunday with her child for Holy Communion, the mother considers her mission accomplished, and not remembering how long ago she herself took communion and confessed. Unfortunately, so is she.
What do the Holy Fathers say about this? What is more important: to grow spiritually by the parents themselves in the first place and, as far as possible, give communion to the baby, or, conversely, first of all, bring the child to church as often as possible, and remember “to oneself” only on major holidays?

Anyta, I'm very glad that you joined the discussion! Thank you very much, it's very nice!
Here is a small excerpt from the article, but I think that we will create a separate topic about the behavior of children in the Temple, while I will unsubscribe here.

In general, parents should not be particularly embarrassed by the not very plausible behavior of their child in the temple. Let him move more or less freely around the temple, look at the icons and candles he likes. However, he should not be allowed to come very close to the altar or communicate with peers during worship. If, out of habit, the child is very tired, and especially if he suddenly begins to scream, cry loudly and openly behave outrageously, he must be taken out of the church for a while to the street or to the premises of the icon shop. At this time, older children should be reminded of the rules of pious behavior in the temple, and the little ones should be entertained with some business: light a candle, look at an icon, a book, because it is much better if this short absence from worship will have some specific goal for the child. However, in no case should you leave him alone on the street, or, even worse, with one of the children. After all, there they will do whatever they please: play, make noise, shout. One must think that after such a “rest,” even the shortest one, the child will no longer be able to return to worship, and all impressions from what he has already seen and heard will quickly dissipate.
For the moral health of the child, parents should put things in order in their own spiritual life, regularly go to confession, take communion.
It is important to remember that raising children in the Orthodox faith, accustoming them to worship, receiving the Sacraments is not an easy spiritual work, and here one should not fall into the sin of “spiritual egoism”, leaving the child at home so that, without being distracted by him, pray more diligently in the temple . So St. Theophan the Recluse tells us that "God looks at you with the same tenderness, both when you pray and when you are busy with the little one." And the experience of Orthodox parents shows that the Lord rewards all efforts in full.

Bonnie

City: Pskov
Gender Female

Sent on 14.01.2010, 03:13

Anyta (13.01.2010, 23:52) wrote:

Erica (01/13/2010, 11:22 PM) wrote:

Anyta, thank you large for advice! In turn, I want to add what happiness is when you come to the Chalice, take communion and your child takes communion, and if it’s dad, then it’s generally wonderful.

I agree, it's perfect harmony!
Anya, please share your experience, how do you manage to take communion yourself and the baby? What time do you come, with a baby, etc. ? It’s just that if we are with Mashulka, then we come closer to the sacrament itself, and then it’s kind of inconvenient to take communion herself. And Masha's whole service is hard. Or maybe it's just my "excuses"?

Can you answer me?
To be honest, more often these are our excuses, but such issues should still be resolved with the priest.
When Zlatulka was very small, we came to confession or a little earlier, we communed Zlata, and then I took communion.
While I was confessing, Zlata was with dad. Now it’s easier for us, the priest can take me to the Temple early, by the beginning of the service, and then Igor and Zlatulka drive up to take communion, and more recently we began to notice that Zlata feels comfortable for a long time in the Temple , it makes us happy. Of course, she finds employment for herself, and our godfather laughs and says "obedience." She clearly watches when the candles burn out and they can be removed from the candlestick, and then also put the cinders in a special bowl, periodically and candles we set it up, and she walks around the Temple, and communicates with her mother, as if the Lord controls everything by herself. This is the topic of how to keep a child busy or distracted.
We also often come to the Sacrament of Communion, but with the blessing of the priest.
And further:
The mother breastfeeds the baby and is already raising it. UPBRINGING. First of all, it is food. And when we give communion to an infant in church, everything he sees and hears, he perceives with his whole being. He cannot explain this logically, but this does not mean at all that his soul is alienated from God and does not feel the presence of God. On the contrary, the pure soul and heart of the child are formed correctly. That is why they say that a mother should receive communion when she is pregnant. This alone educates the soul of a child.
And when a child is born, then we, the parents, lay the spiritual foundations with our example!
Zlatulya started screaming terribly in the Temple at the age of one, I was in shock, everything was fine, but here it’s on you. Whatever we did, but we showed prayer and an example for her relentlessly, God save our godfather, we wouldn’t be able to cope without him and there were moments that he himself said that let's not take communion today, let him look ... And everything passed, in one moment, as if nothing had happened, we just experienced it and learned for ourselves what WE parents did wrong !
But for myself, I made only one conclusion that such behavior of the child primarily depends on the atmosphere in the family!
God save you, my dear, I am very pleased that such topics are important to you!

So, it's done! It is impossible to realize it right away, but nine months of waiting, worries and worries are over - I have a small, touching lump in my hands. My daughter ... The most beautiful, the best, the best. I promise you that I will do everything possible and impossible to make you happy ...

I think all normal parents have experienced similar feelings, they would like to see their children healthy and joyful. We try to give our child everything they need: food, clothes, education, it would seem that we think through everything to the smallest detail. But sometimes we forget about the most important thing in raising a child - his soul.

Spiritual life is impossible without the Church. An adult usually comes to this conclusion sooner or later. But the child cannot understand this, and the parent, realizing the full measure of responsibility to the most dear being for himself, is simply obliged to make the right choice for him.

Churching is hard but necessary work, and you need to make every effort to ensure that the baby has it as easy as possible. You have to start with yourself. Children do not accept lies. If a child sees a striking difference between what is happening in the temple and what he observes at home, he will never be able to become a full member of the Church. And vice versa, if he sees that his family is a "small church", then he will naturally and easily enter into the life of the Church as such. Moreover, childhood is the most fertile time, everything learned at this time by the child will be preserved by him for the rest of his life, and he will not have to painfully seek the Truth.

Probably, I will not be mistaken if I call the center of church life primarily two Sacraments: Confession and Communion. In the Sacrament of Penance, a person receives forgiveness from the Lord. Communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ - gains strength for a grace-filled life in Christ. In the Sacrament of Communion, the most real, genuine union with Christ takes place, since what the Lord said in the Gospel is fulfilled: He who eats My Flesh and drinks My Blood abides in Me, and I in him (John 6, 56).

When a person is just beginning his journey in the Church, many questions and bewilderment arise in him. The more questions arise for parents who enter the church life together with their young children. We will try to answer some of them, namely those related to the Communion of children, this time.

What role does the sacrament play in the lives of children? After all, we partake "for the remission of sins," and what sins can children have?

The nature of every person, regardless of his age, is affected by that terrible corruption, which we most often call original sin. In addition, we are all weak and in need of God's grace-filled help. And who is more defenseless than a child? He doesn't know how to pray. He is protected by the prayers of his parents and the prayers of the Church. Communion, he becomes a part of her, and her maternal cover extends over him. Until the age of 7, a child traditionally takes communion without confession, since it is believed that before this age he is not yet able to truly realize the sinfulness or, conversely, the sinlessness of his actions, and after 7 years before Communion, he will need to confess.

At what age can children receive communion? There is an opinion that a child should be baptized on the 40th, and commune, therefore, the next day.

You can baptize a child immediately after birth - as soon as he is physically ready for this. But in practice, baptism is most often actually performed on the fortieth day or later. Forty days is the period of the so-called "postpartum cleansing", during which a woman should not cross the threshold of the temple. After this time, special prayers should be read over the mother and child (the so-called "prayers of the fortieth day"), after which the mother can again go to the temple and participate in the Church Sacraments. As a rule, they are read immediately before Epiphany. And, of course, when a child is baptized, then, starting from that time, he can already receive communion.

On what day can children be brought to Communion? When is the best time to come?

Communion is possible on any day when the Divine Liturgy is served. In large churches, this is the morning of every day (except Monday, Tuesday and Thursday during Great Lent, when the liturgy is usually not served). In the same temples where the service is not held every day, it is better to find out about this from the priest in advance. It is not necessary to come to the beginning of the service with small children, because they will be very tired themselves, they will cry, and this will tire those around them. But, of course, not right before Communion, better a little earlier.

How often should children receive communion, and should parents always partake of communion at the same time as them?

Communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ has a beneficial effect on the child. The more often this happens, the better. By and large, if there is such an opportunity, then nothing prevents them from receiving communion every day. In any case, children should receive communion at least 2 times a month. Parents, on the other hand, take communion as often as the spiritual father blesses them, after confession.

How to prepare a child for Communion? Do children need to fast?

Communion is a Sacrament, so there must be appropriate preparation for it. For adults, there are certain rules that they must strictly follow. Children, due to their age, are not able to do everything to the fullest. However, in this case, there are recommendations, mainly related to food intake. So, babies should be fed an hour and a half before Communion, children under three years old - a little more, or at least reduce the amount of breakfast (replace it with lean cookies and water). Older children should be kept from eating altogether. But in any case, you need to accustom to this gradually, watching how the child feels.

It is equally important before Communion to explain to the child (if his age already allows it) the meaning of the Sacrament, to tell him how he needs to behave: stand calmly with his arms crossed over his chest, approaching the Chalice, give his name received at baptism (secular names are often do not coincide with church ones), and completely swallow the Holy Gifts, and then calmly approach the table with warmth and prosphora. If the child is not able to remember all this, then an adult should lead him, but this should be done quietly. Before the Chalice, it is better to take the child in your arms.

It would also be good if the day before the child listened to the prayers from the Follow-up to Communion - as much as he can listen with attention.

And, the simplest, but, unfortunately, often overlooked: the child must have a cross.

Will a baby be able to partake of the Flesh and Blood of Christ?

Infants are communed only with Blood, and they are given quite a bit (therefore, during Great Lent, at the Liturgy of the Presanctified Gifts, when believers partake of pre-sanctified Gifts - a particle of the Body of Christ saturated with Blood, small children are not communed). Many express doubts about this, suggesting that the child "didn't take communion enough." This assumption is wrong, since even in the smallest particle the whole Christ is present. When approaching the Chalice, it is not necessary to hold the baby vertically, because in this position it is difficult for him to receive the Holy Gifts. It is better to put it on your right hand, as when feeding.

It is better to swaddle the smallest children or hold them tightly so that they do not inadvertently touch the Cup and knock it over. Based on the same safety considerations, small children should not be applied to the Cup. In general, the behavior of children of any age at this moment should be monitored especially. Even seemingly big children, who have already taken communion more than once, can suddenly make a careless movement.

What to do with a child's clothes if drops of the Blood of Christ accidentally fall on them?

Sometimes it happens that after Communion, a child vomits, or feels sick, or he can simply drop the Holy Gifts from his mouth. Of course, you need to try to prevent this (mother can notice under what circumstances such things happen). But if this did happen, and the Blood ended up on the clothes, you need to take it off and give it to be burned after the service, no matter how expensive it may be. Therefore, it would be good to put a bib or a napkin on the child before Communion, which would not be a pity.

Is it possible to give communion to a child against his will?

It happens that the child refuses to approach the Cup or, even being in the arms of his parents, breaks out and cries. There can be several explanations for this: the baby is tired, he is hungry, which means he is naughty, he does not understand what is happening and is afraid, etc. Each parent has a special approach to his child. You need to try to interest him by telling at home about the Sacraments, the life of the Church, retelling hagiographic stories. Before going to the temple, create a festive atmosphere at home. In the temple, point to the children who take communion so that the child is not afraid. A good example would be the communion of parents or acquaintances. After Communion, you can treat the baby to something delicious. If a child takes communion, be sure to praise him. And over time, he will get used to it and will look forward to Communion.

Although it is necessary to draw the attention of parents to such a very significant point: sometimes the reason for such a child's behavior in front of the Chalice is their own life. And therefore, when planning to give communion to a son or daughter, father and mother should, of course, think whether they themselves confessed and took communion too long ago.

When can I feed my baby after Communion?

With feeding the baby, you need to wait a bit - in order for the Communion to be better "learned". Older children can be fed immediately after Communion and eating prosphora, before kissing the Cross (especially if the child has not eaten or drunk anything since the evening). But if the child is able to go without food until the end of the service, it is better not to feed him.

If a child has a severe allergy, can he receive communion? And is there a risk of getting infected with Communion?

Humanly, such excitement is understandable, but if parents reason in this way, this indicates that they themselves are not aware of what happens during Communion. These fears are due to lack of faith. Of course, instead of warmth, you can give the child a drink brought with you. But can anything harmful happen during communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ? Indeed, in the Chalice is not bread and wine, but the Blood and Body of Christ, this is Life, and therefore health. There has never been a case of Communion causing an allergy attack or any other illness. If a person believes that bread and wine are really transformed into the Flesh and Blood of the Son of God, then can he really believe that when Communion of all from one spoon is “infected” with something? And, on the contrary, if he is not able to believe that the Lord will save him from any harm, then how will he believe in that incomprehensible miracle that takes place in this Sacrament?

Archpriest Alexy Uminsky spoke about the general principles of preparing children for communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ, about the behavior of children in the church and about the attitude of parents to the church life of their children.

— There are more and more children in our church every year: children of different ages. That is why some parents come with their children immediately to the service, others - in the middle of the service: some children go to classes, some do not go, that is, everything happens in different ways. And I would like to voice certain general principles so that everyone has an understanding of what the service is, what the Eucharist is.

The first thing I would like to draw your attention to is that I think it is very wrong when children receive communion without parents. It's becoming a not-so-good tradition to just bring children to communion. And what happens to the child? How does he comprehend this for himself emotionally, because the child cannot understand it differently? It turns out that the communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ for a baby is a kind of almost magical act: parents think that if they often commune a child, then everything will be fine with him. It seems to me that this is the result of a deep misunderstanding by parents of what is happening in the temple. It is clear that children, growing up, will not understand the meaning of the Liturgy.

Do we understand when we bring our child to the Holy Chalice, why do we do it? Can one of the parents answer this question now?

– For the child to unite with Christ, for Christ to participate in his life.

You correctly said that both for a child and for an adult it is one and the same thing, it is a union with Christ, so that the life of Christ and the life of a child are common. And what follows? Let's develop this idea further.

We hand over the life of our child to God.

- Correctly. And then what? Do you understand that at this moment there is a huge risk that a parent takes in relation to his child? At this moment, we give our child into the hands of God, making him a participant in the gospel. But we do not give ourselves together with him into the hands of God. It is very important to realize this: if we do not come to communion together with the child, do not share it with him, there is some kind of inconsistency, inferiority in this. Maybe we think that when taking communion, the child will not get sick? Or will he feed on grace and grow up to be a kind, good person? Or will something happen to him by itself: unknown, mystical, which will make him a deeply religious person besides us? But this is an erroneous, insufficient, consciously unthought-out and flawed idea.

A child really does not understand anything, even when he is seven years old, even at ten years old he understands almost nothing about it. And to think that in itself something is happening in his mind, in his soul and heart apart from us - this is the greatest illusion.

It is much more convenient if children take communion separately, but children see how parents do not take communion, and do not see how parents take communion. This is a very serious thing: it means that what we imagine as a common life remains declarative and nothing more. Then we can explain to the children as much as we like that the sacrament is the true Body and Blood of Christ, although in general this is not clear to anyone ... And even more so to children ... They perceive everything completely differently, first of all, emotionally: their eyes work, ears at this moment, it is important for them that they are paid attention. And at this important moment, parents are simply offering. They do not share the emotional joy of the child, and that joy does not go home with them. So they took communion together and with this joy they return home, they experience this joy of common communion together - all this is not there, and this is the most important thing. That's what the kids are taught about, and what the sacrament is, and what faith is - what it's like to share your life with Christ. Otherwise, it can be very difficult to convey this to children.

Therefore, the first thing I want to draw your attention to, dear parents, let's not have this in our country, and parents will take communion with their children.

– What should I do if my husband is an unbeliever, works a lot, is at home only on weekends, and I have to give him time and cannot prepare for communion, so I commune on another day?

Of course, sometimes you have to compromise. The moment of preparation for children and parents is different, and the frequency of communion may be different, I agree. I understand that it is not always possible for parents and children to partake of communion together, but this should not be prevalent. I am against them taking communion together only as an exception.

The main thing is to strive for the family to commune together, for the sake of this it is possible to somehow weaken both fasting and external preparation for communion, but not internal reverence, the state of fear of God. The main thing is a common life, and here it should be common.

We allow our large families to arrive not at the beginning of the Liturgy, but not at the very last moment. You can arrive towards the end of the service, but still not to the actual communion. It is very important for us that the children with the whole family spend some time at the Liturgy in a calm state, so that there is no running around, so that everyone can see the beauty of the temple, listen to the hymn, so that for everyone this, even if it is a short time, becomes a time of prayerful reverent state. I beg you: do not resort to the Chalice at the last moment. Parents themselves must determine what part of the Liturgy is acceptable for their children.

It may seem strange, but I am against the fact that children must receive communion at every Liturgy. How does it sometimes happen? We arrived in a turmoil, everyone quarreled in the morning, reached the church by the end of the service, quickly took communion and left ... I don’t understand this: no one was at the Liturgy, no one was preparing for it ... Bustle, vanity .. But just to take communion ... This is also seen me the greatest mistake: when everything is built as a mechanical action - there is a baby and he must be communed every week ... Why? What for? These questions are not asked. And if this happens as overcoming some terrible obstacles, this is not necessary. A child who receives communion in this way will scream and break out, because the parents arrived in an irritated, embittered state. In such a state, one should not come to the temple. That's how to take communion - no need. Let us not take communion every Sunday, but let it be a family, normal, calm trip to the temple.

If we ourselves are afraid to take communion in court or in condemnation, then why should a child be given communion in such a state?.. What are we doing?.. We think that he is sinless, and nothing will happen to him? This does not mean that the Lord will condemn the child, but we will bear responsibility for the fact that we brought the child in such a state, and he took the sacrament as an act of violence against himself. Is it necessary? No, it's harmful.

– And if the child always screams during communion?

– I don’t think that this is due to a spiritual problem, rather it is some kind of psychological situation… Maybe the child was ill, he was given medicine, and he began to associate communion with taking something tasteless. Or maybe someone in the church frightened him ... So wait, you don’t need to take communion in such a state. Let him get rid of his problem.

Not all children from the age of seven need to go to confession, some are not yet ready for this: they slow down, they are afraid, it is still too early for them. It is also not necessary for all children at an early age to go to confession every Sunday. Some children are ready for this: they know what to say in confession, but there are children who cannot say anything about themselves. Why torture them? It is enough for them to confess, maybe once a month. It is necessary to proceed not only from the age of the child, but from his development, his psychological state. If the children do not go to confession, let them just come under the blessing, so that they have some kind of form showing that it is not so easy to come to the sacrament.

Everyone prepares for communion differently. and, of course, you need to prepare . In some way, the child must tune in to the fact that he will receive communion.

Then you can read the prayer of John Chrysostom: "I believe, Lord, and confess ..." and gradually add two prayers from the rule, the fourth and fifth, they are quite simple. And be sure to explain the meaning of these prayers. I think this little rule is enough. All other prayers from the following cannot apply to children in any way, they cannot apply them to themselves in any way. Maybe you can add some separate troparia from the canon, see for yourself, reprint them on a separate sheet, but troparia and canons are more difficult to understand than prayers.

It is believed that from the age of four, a child can no longer be fed before communion. But, again, children are different: if the service starts at ten o'clock, and communion around twelve, not all of them can stand it.

It is known that the speed of a squadron is determined by the slowest ship. The weakest link in the family should be the main one, the system of the whole family is measured by it: if the younger one is tired, everyone else should also rest. Churched families believe that children should be churched in such a way that it doesn’t seem small to them. I know a family where a child goes to church with pleasure, to liturgy and all-night vigil, attends Sunday school, but in an ordinary school he suddenly went into full dressing. The parental request is that the child must show himself to be a saint. And the child tries, wants to be good, he sees how important it is for parents, but he only has enough for this, for this Sunday, and then he can neither get together nor study. There is no need to make experimental sites for holiness out of children. An eight-year-old child cannot stand for three hours at the All-Night Vigil and two hours at the Liturgy, and then Sunday school. Children see how important this is for you, they will try, but they will not be able to study in a regular school, they have no rest. Therefore, arrange a weekend for your children, especially for younger students. Let them sleep off, go with them to the park, to the museum, go skiing... You see: the child is tired - let them rest, rest with them, even if the family is church-going.

If you are coming with children to the beginning of the Liturgy, then please keep an eye on your children. Do not pretend that these are not your children. And it turns out that the one that is on hand is looked after, and the rest ... And why is this for children? They begin to run around, make noise, go about their business, other parishioners begin to calm them down, and parents begin to resent: how is it that my child is reprimanded?! This is very bad. Children in the temple at least for a while should pray. For this we bring them to the temple. If the children in the temple do not pray at all, then why all this?

During the service, parents sit on benches in the back of the church, and the children do not see the Liturgy, because it is shielded from them by the backs of the parishioners. Be kind: go ahead, take the best places, this is a place for children.

Parents who come to the service with their children and dedicate their attention to the children from beginning to end do not pray during the Liturgy. If you want to be with the children in the church and pray, then you will pray, and everyone else will take care of your children, or you will take care of your children, and then your children will pray a little, and you must understand that you will not be able to do this. . And in general, when children grow up, a deep, serious prayer life cannot be obtained in principle. Then she returns, but for a while, while the children are small, she moves away, and prayer gives way to humility and patience, which, in fact, is equivalent to prayer. A patient humble attitude towards children and neighbors at this moment is tantamount to prayer. When you are attending to your children in the temple, do not be afraid - the Lord sees you, He knows what you are doing now. And you are busy with a very important thing - taking care that your children are now standing before God, so that he feels your care. At some point, you can leave the temple with them when one of them is tired, then return ... But it is they who are the object of your attention. If they lose your attention - it's a disaster, it's wrong. Therefore, you come to the temple and look after your children - this is the most important thing.

“Isn’t it important that children see that their parents are praying?”

- Do you think that when you pray, and the children run around the candlesticks, they see you?

After the liturgy, on the day of communion, no matter how the day turns out, children cannot be punished. Anything can happen: they get very tired, it’s stuffy in the temple, the parents get tired too, and the child turns out to be guilty ... No matter how badly the children behave, no matter how capricious, everything must end in peace. Parental patience, even if the child is wrong, must win.

Let this day at home be sure to have some kind of small holiday, something tasty, some kind of cake. Let from early childhood, Sunday is perceived as a holiday, and not as a long, hard journey for no reason.

And it would be nice, at least on the twelfth holidays, to come to the temple beautifully dressed. Parents: mom, dad, and child go to the temple as if for a holiday with all the attributes of a holiday. And then this holiday must be celebrated at home. Think it over for sure, let this day be marked by some ordinary childish joy, so that it fixes for him - this is a special day, this is not just a day of work, some kind of tension and fatigue, but a day that ends with a joyful, good event, the most simple.

Archpriest Alexy Uminsky

Some parents believe that babies have no concept of sin, and what is the point of giving communion to a baby who does not have sins? However, St. Theophan the Recluse said that Communion effectively and vividly unites the infant with the Lord, as a new member of His Church. According to the teaching of the saint, Communion sanctifies him, pacifies him and protects him from the dark forces of God's grace.

Every person, even an unconscious infant, is open to receiving God's grace, which is perceived not by consciousness, but by the soul. In addition, there is evidence that children who receive communion often get sick less, sleep better, and do not act up. But not everyone knows the rules for the communion of children. We will try to answer the most popular questions.

What part of the service to come with children

Up to a year

With an infant, you can come to receive the Sacrament after the Liturgy. At the same time, babies can be fed before communion. Only this should be done at least half an hour before communion, so that the baby does not accidentally burp. Mothers who were preparing for Communion are allowed to partake of the Holy Mysteries together with their children, even if they came with them towards the end or the middle of the Liturgy.

Up to seven years

From the age of two or three, it is necessary to gradually accustom the child to be in the service, at least with a prayer preceding the end of the Liturgy, that is, with the church-wide singing of the Lord's Prayer.

After 3 years, you can try not to feed the child, but there are no strict rules about this. Some feed children before the service up to 6-7 years. Every parent should approach this issue with understanding. It is good to consult a priest about this. From the age of seven, it is customary to teach children to fast, but not strictly and gradually. For example, you can convince him for the sake of Christ to stop watching cartoons, or eating some food that is especially tasty for him.

Up to ten years

Children from 7 to 10 years old should be brought to the church to sing “Like Cherubim”.

It must be remembered that not every child, especially a small one, can withstand the entire service, and therefore parents can come to the temple later. With children who are over 10 years old, you should come to a full service, but if the parents notice that the child is tired, they can go outside with him, take a walk around the temple. You should know that not all children have the patience to endure the entire service, so do not force him to do this, as you can cause him to dislike worship.

What prayers to read to children before Communion

Priests recommend that parents read at least one prayer or several prayers aloud to their children in preparation for communion. Moms (unlike dads) do not have to read all the canons and all the rules. It is enough to read the prayer rule for Holy Communion. At the same time, either dad, or godparents, or grandparents can read the canons and the rule for the child.

If, apart from the mother, no one can do this, then she should pray according to her abilities. But even if mom does not have time for a large number of prayers, then it is enough to pray according to the rule of the reverend:

“Our Father - 3 times”, “Virgin Mary rejoice - 3 times”, “I believe - 1 time”

There is no need to fast for a child. However, before the Communion of the child, parents should refrain from marital relations. We must try to do everything possible so that coming to the temple to introduce the child to grace does not turn out to be useless. But we must do everything to the best of our ability, because God knows our strength, He does not expect anything impossible from us.

We must remember that it is not enough just to bring a child to the temple and give him communion. Parents should try to keep the grace received in the temple. On the day of communion, be peaceful, do not get annoyed, and even more so, do not quarrel. On the contrary, try to show special love for each other. Children - they are sensitive, and they will definitely understand that the day of Communion is a special day. Only by their example, by their kind-hearted attitude towards each other and towards their children, parents will be able to instill in their children a reverent religious feeling.

How to teach children to pray

The child must be taught to pray in his own words. For example, “Lord, save me, dad and mom, my godparents (names), grandparents (names)”. As you grow (from three to four years old), you can already teach the child the main prayer "Our Father...". In this case, the child should explain each word so that he specifically understands the meaning of the prayer.

Gradually (from the age of four or five) the child can be given a short rule of several prayers. “Our Father...”, “Virgin Mary, rejoice...”, “Holy angel of God, pray to God for me”, “Lord, save me and have mercy on me, dad and mom, my godparents, grandma and grandpa”. The rule for the child should not be difficult, and short (from 5 to 10 minutes in the morning and evening). The main thing is that he understands what to pray for and prays willingly.

How to Prepare for Confession

Children have different ideas about sin than adults. Therefore, the Church, as a rule, does not confess children under the age of 7 years. Children under this age are not confessed because although children can tell about their sins, they cannot bring repentance in order to completely correct themselves.

Parents of children from 7 years of age should find time for a little preparation for their first confession. If a child has committed an unseemly act, parents should explain to him why he acted badly and ask him to ask for forgiveness, first from God, and then from them. This is how the first skills of confession are instilled. Over time, parents need to have simple conversations with their child about confession, about the meaning of the Sacrament of Communion. To say in accessible words about God who loves everyone. God sees all the deeds, all the actions of people, including children, all their thoughts. And if the child has done something bad, he waits for him to confess this to his parents and tell the priest in confession, through whom God will forgive him bad deeds, that is, sins.

How often can children receive communion

When asked how many times children can take communion, every priest will probably answer: “As often as possible.” But there are certain, recommended periods of time. Babies can receive communion almost every day, and children from a year or more 2-3 times a week. Children after seven years, once a week or once every two weeks and on holidays. Note that these are just recommendations. It happens that due to employment, parents give communion to their children less often, so they should decide on this in accordance with their capabilities.