A modern name book with recommendations on how to name a child (N. B. Sheshko). How to choose a name for a child: tips for future parents

Pregnant women pay great attention to choosing a name for their unborn child. And this is absolutely correct, because the name should give the baby a happy fate, and, at the same time, it should sound beautiful. In this article, we will tell how to choose a name for an unborn child to make his life successful.

Parents who are expecting the birth of their daughter want to choose the most beautiful name for her, so that it emphasizes their love for the child and the tenderness they feel for the baby.

However, in fact, when choosing a name for a daughter, one should be guided not by his sweetness and his feelings, but by completely different characteristics. We will give you some advice how to choose the right baby name if you have a girl:

• The name should emphasize the individuality of the baby. If, looking at her, you understand that she is neither Pelageya, but an ordinary girl named Masha, then it is better to call her a simple but suitable name for her.
• If you want your daughter to bear the name of a great-grandmother or other distant relative who positively influenced your life, and you want to show your respect for her by naming her daughter after her, then first make sure that it sounds normal and corresponds to modern canons. The girl will not be very pleased if her peers laugh at her, having learned her strange, unusual for anyone, name.
• If you are watching some interesting foreign series and you really like the name of the main character, you should not rush to name your baby after her. For example, the name Aelitta or Isabella will sound strange if the girl's surname is Petrenko, and the middle name is Ivanovna. Such exotic names can be used if your family is international. If you really want to name the child after the heroine of the Latin American series, then go through a special phonosemantic analysis of the name via the Internet. This test will show you what kind of reaction a set of sounds will cause in others when the baby is called by name, surname and patronymic.

• You should not give the girl the name of a famous cultural figure or, for example, art, if your last name is the same as the name of an outstanding person. People will take this with derision, and it will be unpleasant for a girl in adulthood to realize that her name is not at all unique.
• Do not call the baby by the name of her mother or grandmother. Let the baby have its own original name, which will emphasize its uniqueness. Choose a name for the child by the names of the parents- this is an old and illogical tradition, because this will not affect the fate of the baby in any way.
• Before registering a child in the registry office, read in the dictionary what the name you have chosen means. You may not like its meaning.
• If you want your daughter to grow up as a strong and self-confident person, then choose a solid name for her, even a male one.
• Analyze what associations people will have when they address your daughter by name. People always draw parallels with people who have become famous under a certain name.
• Make sure that you can’t pick up a funny offensive nickname for the girl’s name. Of course, children are resourceful people, if they want, they will definitely come up with an unpleasant nickname, but still pay attention to it.

In general, the name should be chosen with the soul. If you feel that your baby should be called that way, then do not even doubt that she will be happy with him.

How to choose a male name for a child?

thinking what name to choose for the child if you have a boy, follow the above rules. In this case, they work too. However, there are a few more points that psychologists advise considering when choosing a name for your son:

1. Don't name your son after his father. Nothing but the pride of the father, such a name will not emphasize. The names of such a plan sound especially strange: Ostapenko Ostap Ostapovich, Ivanov Ivan Ivanovich. If you want your boy to grow up strong, independent and courageous, choose a name for him that will have nothing to do with the name of the pope.
2. Keep in mind that your son will someday also become a dad. Therefore, his name should sound good as a patronymic. Pick up a few female and male names, comparing them with the middle name that your grandchildren will have. If everything sounds good, feel free to call the boy by the chosen name.
3. Do not call the boy a non-existent name. Some parents, who try to resist the canons of modernity in everything, begin to invent names themselves or name their children in honor of some achievements of scientific and technological progress. Imagine how they would treat a boy named Google or Quark.
4. Do not call your son a name that can be called a girl if your last name is not declined. It must necessarily emphasize the gender of the child.

How to choose a name for a child by numerology?

Parents who want to predict the fate of their unborn child can choose a name for him according to numerology. Numbers play a very large and important role in human life. They show what spiritual and physical qualities your child will develop if you name him according to a certain number on the day he was born.

You can use special programs online to choose the name of the baby by date of birth, or you can manually calculate the lucky number for the baby yourself, knowing his last name and patronymic:

1. Write in 2 lines the surname in block letters and patronymic. Then, according to the table, which clearly states which letter corresponds to which number, write down all the numbers:

• figure "one" correspond to the letters: "A", "I", "C", "b"
• figure "2" correspond to the letters: "B", "Y", "T", "Y"
• figure "3" correspond to the letters: "B", "K", "U", "b"
• figure "four" correspond to the letters: "G", "L", "F", "E"
• figure "5" correspond to the letters: "D", "M", "X" "U"
• figure "6" correspond to the letters: "E", "H", "C", "I"
• figure "7" correspond to the letters: "Yo", "O", "H"
• figure "eight" correspond to the letters: "Ж", "П", "Ш"
• figure "9" correspond to the letters: "З", "Р", "Ш"

For example, your child's last name and first name sound like:

• Matveev - 5, 1, 2, 3, 6, 6, 3
• Pavlovich - 8, 1, 3, 4, 7, 3, 1 4

1. Count how many times each digit occurs in the last name and patronymic:

• 1 - 3 times
• 2 - once
• 3-4 times
• 4 - 2 times
• 5 - one
• 6 - 2 times
• 7 - 1 time
• 8 - 1 time
• 9 - no

1. Next, compare all the numbers with their average value:

• number "one" has an average value of "6": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will have normal intelligence, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will have a strong will and leadership, if less, he will be completely unsure of himself, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow spineless and weak.
• number "2" has an average value of "1": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will be sociable and very tactful, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will have numerous talents and extraordinary charisma, if less - he will be tactless and impatient, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up to be a callous person.
• number "3" has an average value of "3": if this figure in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will have creative abilities, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will be versatile talented, if less - he will focus poorly on some things, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up closed in himself.

• number "four" has an average value of "2": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will be a hardworking and practical person, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will be stubborn and too passionate about his work, when he grows up, if less - he will be lazy, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up unable to provide for himself or his future family.
• number "5" has an average value of "1": if this figure in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will have a high ability to quickly adapt in society and openness in communicating with people, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will be too restless, if less - he will be unsociable, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up in the desire to always be isolated from society.
• number "6" has an average value of "3": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will be a caring and very responsible person, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will have a desire to constantly improve himself, if less - he will be an insensitive person, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up stupid and naive.
• number "7" has an average value of "3": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will show a special interest in knowledge, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will have a strong love for science, but at the same time he will grow up as an isolated person, if less, he will not be able to analyze the events taking place in his life, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up distrustful of everything.

• number "eight" has an average value of "1": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will be independent and businesslike, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will have a strong grasp in commercial activities , if less, he will be an impractical and unhardworking person, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up passive, neglecting any material wealth and values.
• number "9" has an average value of "1": if this number in the name is not rare, not often between the main and average value, then your child will be optimistic and compassionate, if it is more than its average value, then the baby will sacrifice himself in life for the sake of interests other people, if less - he will be a callous pessimist, if there is no such figure at all, the baby will grow up to be a depressed person.

When choosing a name, you need to find a balance between the average value and the number of times the numbers appear in the name so that only positive qualities develop in your child.

How to choose a name for a child according to the calendar?

There is an ancient tradition choose an orthodox name for the child by saints. It is connected with the fact that a child bearing the name of a saint acquires a very close relationship with him. It is believed that the saint, whose name was given to the child, becomes his guardian angel in life and helps to overcome various difficulties on the path of life.

If you want to choose a name for the child according to the church calendar then wait for his day birth. On this date, you need to choose a name for the child. The calendar contains the entire list of names of Old Slavonic, Greek, Jewish or Latin origin, from which you can choose the one that you like best.

If you are not a supporter of naming the baby according to the holy calendar, you can give him the name of the saint on whose day the child was born, at baptism. Just ask the priest in advance what name it is better to call the baby during the rite of baptism.

The name of a person can say a lot about him, so we recommend that every future parent take this issue scrupulously and responsibly. Do not listen to anyone's recommendations and requests from relatives to name the baby the way they like. You must choose for your crumbs a name that you would like, first of all. You must be sure that the child with the name you choose will grow up to be a happy person!

Video: "How to choose a name for a child?"

Name sounds.

From early childhood throughout life, we do not hear a single word as often as our own name. It consists of a set of sounds of various pitches that excite certain parts of the brain, thus affecting its wearer, as well as the people around him.

Some names sound firmly, hard: Igor, Dmitry, Anatoly, Zhanna, Dina, Ekaterina, Daria etc. Under the influence of a sound stimulus, a persistent, stubborn character is formed in children with such names. They are independent and determined.

Owners soft sounding names: Svetlana, Irina, Vera, Natalya, Mikhail, Sergey, Alexey, Ilya, Vasily etc. - usually have a calm, docile nature.

There is neutral, as if intermediate between hard and soft, names: Artem, Arkady, Andrey, Alexander, Valentin, Vitaly, Roman, Pavel, Olga, Anna, Anastasia, Zoya, Lyudmila, Lyubov etc. As a rule, such people are balanced, reasonable, moderately persistent.

The name must be chosen so that it is easy to pronounce, well pronounced both by itself and together with the patronymic.

If the name ends with a consonant sound, and the patronymic begins with it, and even in the name-patronymic itself there are many consonants - Alexander Dmitrievich, Eduard Dmitrievich - the sound is difficult. Either the first name or the patronymic is often distorted, and the person anxiously waits for what they will call him this time.

You should not name children by the names of deceased relatives, especially those who died tragically.

No need to give names in honor of grandparents. The child inherits a certain share of characteristic features, and, as you know, the bad is transmitted more easily.

Do not call children difficult-to-pronounce names or in honor of any significant events and people ( Revolution, Aurora, Stalin etc.), so as not to complicate their lives in the future.

Do not give children the names of the heroes of their favorite television series, famous writers or prominent scientists - especially if the patronymic and surname match. Imagine that in the family of engineer Nikolai Tolstoy, their son was named Leo in honor of the writer. At school, the boy was not given literature and the Russian language, and he became the object of ridicule from his peers. As a result, the child received a serious psychological trauma and stopped going to school. Parents hardly managed to correct the situation by transferring him to another class.

Sons should not be named after their father: Nikolai Nikolaevich, etc. - the owners of such names grow unbalanced, nervous, irritable, capricious. The girl should also not be called by the name of her mother - it will be difficult for them to find a common language.

Influence of patronymic.

The middle name carries genetic information - something that is inherent in nature itself and is passed down from generation to generation. It corrects the image that has developed under the influence of the name, without changing it radically, but softening or, conversely, sharpening some features.

"Rigid"patronymic is Nikolaevich, Anatolyevich, Dmitrievich, Igorevich, Stanislavovich, Adolfovich, Vissarionovich, Vitoldovich, Veniaminovich, Valdemarovich, Vladlenovich, Rostislavovich, Emmanuilovich, Albertovich, Samuilovich, Yulianovich .

"Soft" - Mikhailovich, Sergeevich, Efimovich, Ilyich, Ignatievich, Vladimirovich, Petrovich, Viktorovich .

"Neutral" -Pavlovich, Vadimovich, Natanovich, Kirillovich, Makarovich, Mironovich, Yakovlevich, Leontievich, Vitalievich, Velentinovich, Artemovich, Tara sovic...

Soft pronounced first names: Mikhail Ivanovich, Andrei Vladimirovich, Sergei Mikhailovich, Mikhail Sergeevich etc. - belong to people who are kind, accommodating, able to find a common language with others. Alexandrovich- Usually a person is impulsive, sharp. Igorevichi more often than others stubborn, tough. Nikolaevichi they often behave rudely, sometimes unpredictably, it is difficult to find a common language with them. This patronymic gives a person increased emotionality, instability.

Research suggests that the owners of " tough"patronymics in life have a harder time than their namesakes with soft, calm middle names. Therefore, it is better to give children "soft" names to "hard" patronymics, and vice versa. For example, Nikolaevich, Dmitrievich, Anatolyevich, Rostislavovich, Stanislavovich, Veniaminovich should be called Sergey, Mikhail, Peter, Ilya, Vasily, Evgeny, Victor, Irina, Natalya, Polina, Vera; Sergeevich , Alekseevich, Vasilyevich - Nikolai, Dmitry, Anatoly, Denis, Stanislav, Marina, Lydia, Evgenia, Alexandra, Victoria .

TO " neutral"patronymics are more suitable" soft"names: Sergey, Mikhail, Victor, Alexey . They can also be given solid names, but only if the children were born in spring or summer.

The seasons and the formation of personality.

Talented, strong-willed, purposeful, thinking individuals are born in winter, but in family life they experience difficulties because of their quarrelsomeness, intransigence, the need to argue over trifles and be sure to win. Many have a tough temper, tough, domineering. These qualities are most pronounced in those born in December, weaker in February, " January"Children are more balanced." Winter"Women most often have a masculine character, gravitate towards the exact or natural sciences. Therefore, we advise you to give winter children "soft" melodic names so as not to aggravate some of the character traits inherent in nature.

spring people are vulnerable physically and mentally. They are indecisive, touchy, windy, selfish. Many of them are very talented, but not self-confident, so they cannot be leaders. They have a subtle sense of humor, have a good memory and quickly grasp everything. March men pay great attention to their appearance, often look in the mirror. They make good diplomats and orators. Women do not get married for a long time - they are afraid of the upcoming changes. Spring babies need to be given "hard" sounding names to counter an unstable nervous system and psyche.

"Summer"children are kind, but often cowardly and spineless. Easily influenced, emotional and impressionable, they love risk, proud, persistent, courageous. They love children, treat nature and animals with care, are well versed in art. " summer"Children should be given 'hard' names to protect them from unwanted adversity.

"autumn"People are universal. They are reasonable, serious, comprehensively gifted, appreciate the accumulated experience and never repeat mistakes. They do everything slowly and deliberately, they are good diplomats, they have a clear mind, an easy character." autumn"Children can be given any names, since nothing can affect their natural character.

Why is it needed.

Knowing the natural coloring of the name and patronymic and the date of birth, you can choose the right name and successfully develop the qualities that your child lacked from birth, or, conversely, muffle the unwanted ones.

It is very useful to consider the characteristics of the name when raising a child:

Alexei(especially "summer" or "spring") - a coward, a crybaby. If you scold and punish him for it all the time, the child will grow up irritable, selfish, embittered.

Alexander- a merry fellow, naughty, a liar, but has an innate sense of justice. Once undeservedly punishing him, you risk losing your authority forever.

Nicholas- quick-tempered, unbalanced, proud. You should not hurt his pride, try to instill respect for others.

Natalya(especially "winter") - ambitious, leaders by nature. They are spurred on by rewards for some kind of success. However, they do not tolerate flattery, they perfectly feel insincerity, lies.

Olga- Fair, hard to compromise.

Lyudmila- ambitious, vain, striving for universal recognition, often experiencing bitter disappointment.

Irina- natures are easily carried away, amorous. No matter how they were brought up, personal life, heart affairs will always be in the foreground.

If you decide to change the name of the child and choose one that could protect him and change his character for the better, this must be done before the age of five. The main thing is that the name corresponds to the internal state of the person, then discomfort will disappear and complete harmony will gradually be established.

Read about the meaning of all names from A to Z

Magazine "Motherhood", April 1999

Parents are guided by different criteria when choosing a name for the crumbs. This can be either consonance with the patronymic and surname, or a family tradition or a church calendar.

Consonance

In accordance with the rules of consonance, if the patronymic begins with several consonants, then the name should not end with the same cluster of consonants. For example, Alexander Dmitrievich - this combination is difficult to pronounce due to the accumulation of consonants.

Also, do not choose a name that ends with the same letter that begins the patronymic, for example, Peter Rostislavovich.

Girls usually do not have such problems, since their names end in vowels. But this applies only to names of Slavic origin. If you like the "overseas" name, you should pay attention to consonance.

Also don't forget to think ahead a few things. For example, affectionate forms of the name, how they will sound.

Try to pronounce the last name, first name and patronymic in full to hear how they fit together.

For example, you may like the name Aurika, but "Khrushch Aurika Ivanovna" may not sound very compatible.

Often the name and patronymic of the child in interethnic families do not match. So, Maria Mikhaylovna or Ivan Stevenovich may be born.

In addition, if you choose a name for a boy, think about the fact that someday he will become a dad, and his name will become a patronymic. It will be difficult for your grandson to choose a name consonant with the patronymic if you name your son, for example, Michael.

Traditions

But some families have their own special traditions. For example, once in the family a man named Ivan called his son Andrei. He, in turn, named his son in honor of his father - Ivan. And so there was a tradition to name a son in honor of his father (in honor of the grandfather of the child). Thus, all the boys in the family are either Ivan Andreevich or Andrei Ivanovich.

There are also traditions to name children after someone. But this is a moot point. For example, some believe that if you name a child in honor of a deceased relative, then the spirit of this relative will protect the baby. others believe that this is the opposite - not good, and the fate of the same deceased person awaits the crumbs. But this is mostly about superstition.

The traditions of choosing a name for a child may differ in different countries, in different regions of the same country, and even in different families. Therefore, whether to adhere to certain traditions is your choice.

Choosing a name according to saints

Most often, one day accounts for how many saints. Therefore, when parents refer to the church calendar to name a baby, they look at the date the baby was born and choose the name of one of the saints who is revered on that day.

It is believed that the saint whose name is chosen for the baby becomes the child's guardian angel. That is why the name day - the day when they honor the memory of the saint, in whose honor the baby is named - is also called Angel Day.

The child is given a name in accordance with the Saints at baptism. If the parents do not like any of the names that the father suggests in accordance with the date of birth of the baby, they choose a name from the list of those provided on the next day according to the calendar.

If the baby was named by some exotic name, then at baptism the priest selects a more or less consonant name from the church book.

Also, the baby can be named after the saint who is most revered in this particular family, regardless of the date of birth. Thus, parents choose a patron for their child.

How to name a child in August 2017

Alexander ("defender"), Anton ("entering the battle", "opposing"), Arkady ("shepherd"), Athanasius ("immortal"), Boris ("fighting for glory"), Valentine ("to be healthy") , Vasily ("royal, regal"), Herman ("close", "native"), George ("landowner"), Gleb ("favorite of the gods"), Dmitry ("dedicated to Demeter"), Denis ("belonging to Dionysus" ), David (“beloved”, “beloved”, “favorite”), Yermolai (“germolaos”), Emelyan (“affectionate”), Evdokim (“honorary”, “enjoying good fame”), Elizar (“God helped” ), Ilya (“my God is Jehovah Savva (“archer”), Ippolit (“unharnessing horses”), Ivan (“given by God”), Kuzma (“energetic”), Clement (“merciful”), Cornelius (“Archer ”), Constantine (“permanent”), Leonid (“like a lion”), Lawrence (“crowned with laurels”), Moses (“extracted or saved from the water”), Maximilian (“greatest”), Michael (“like God” ), Miron (“fragrant resin”), Makar (“blessed, happy”), Nikanor (“seeing victory”), Nikolai (“victor of peoples”), Pavel ( "small", "insignificant"), Prokhor ("choir manager"), Peter ("stone"), Polycarp ("fertile"), Roman ("Roman"), Stepan ("crown"), Sergey ("guardian" ), Seraphim ("fiery angel"), Semyon ("listening", "heard by God"), Tikhon ("lucky"), Trofim ("breadwinner"), Fedor ("God's gift"), Julian ("curly")

Women's names, meanings of names:

Anna ("grace"), Anfisa ("blooming"), Anastasia ("resurrection"), Arina ("peace"), Alina ("noble"), Elena ("bright"), Evdokia ("Goodwill"), Iraida (“daughter of the hero”), Karina (“flawless”), Christina (“follower of Christ”), Maria (“stubborn”), Nonna (“ninth”), Olympias (“daughter of Olympus”), Praskovya (“Saturday eve, Friday"), Seraphim ("fiery"), Ulyana ("curly", "fluffy")

If you will soon become parents, then the question of how to name the baby has probably been bothering you for more than a month.

So I want to choose the perfect name, suitable for the child in all respects.

March men devote a lot of time to their appearance - they make good speakers and diplomats . Women do not marry for a long time, fearing change. It is better for children born in the spring to give solid names to add a little toughness and self-confidence to the character.

summer birth gives a person a lot of kindness, but at the same time, a little cowardice and spinelessness. Such children will be easily influenced, they are emotional and impressionable, they like risk, they are proud, courageous and persistent. Growing up, a person will love children, take care of animals and nature, and be well versed in art. Children born in the summer should be given tough names to protect them from unwanted adversity.

The most "universal" are autumn people. They are serious, reasonable, comprehensively gifted and will not repeat past mistakes (this is a rather controversial issue: the author of this article was born in November and periodically steps on the same rake). People born in autumn do everything slowly, considering every step, they are good diplomats with a clear mind and easy character. If you are expecting a baby in the fall, you can give him any name, because nothing can affect his natural character.

Don't need to be called

You should not name the baby after the deceased grandparents or family members who died a tragic death. The feeling of grief that once happened can haunt a child all his life (this is a real pattern tracked by scientists). A name that is too original or invented by you may also not bring happiness to your heir - thanks to them, it will be very difficult for a person at school and in life.

Mommy - Alina tells : “Recently there has been a boom in unusual baby names. We have Erica, Emilia in our yard, and only Margaritas in the area. There are only 8 Margots, two Polinas and two Eva in the group in the kindergarten. I wouldn’t want to name my child in a way that mothers from the playgrounds will then call out to half the yard. It’s good that when we named our Seryozha, Alexandra and Marka were popular.”

Hello. I've already somehow created a topic about neighbor's dogs, how to scare them away. In the autumn, in September, a neighbor's dog bit our kitten, in the middle of the day, one might say, in front of a neighbor (the owner of the dog) and ours (I and my son saw it). They simply simply did not have time to do anything, how much does a 3-month-old kitten need. I then said a lot of things to the neighbors because of their dogs. They apologized, promised to look after them, but at the same time the phrase sounded: hunting dogs (ordinary mongrels at the same time) and cats will still be attacked, they called it happy (((
To be honest, I didn’t want to have cats anymore, but in October, for my daughter’s birthday, they brought her a gift-kitten .. There is a tray at home and the cat goes there, but only in a small way, but in a big one she got used to the street. They let her out, looked after her all the time. And that week, the neighbor's dog jumped over the snowdrifts to our yard and grabbed the cat right at the porch. At that time, I was hanging clothes to dry under a canopy, he did not see me, but I did not immediately see / did not hear him, he attacked without a sound. I jumped out at the squeal of a cat. I repulsed it, while he slashed his teeth on the sleeve of the jacket and tore my sleeve. When I calmed down and treated the cat a little and calmed down myself, I went to the neighbors and said I would complain. The weekend passed, they did not take any measures (the dog both ran down the street and continues to run). Today I wrote a complaint to the district police officer, but I was struck by his words, they say, we cannot take any measures in relation to the owner of the dog, there is no punishment or fine for this. Only if you go further and sue them for material and moral damage. But I don’t want to get involved with the court because of the cat and the torn sleeve. Are there really no laws so that the district police officer, relying on them, could somehow influence the owners of dogs who strangle cats on their own and in other people's yards? In general, I wrote a lot, just if you start a war with your neighbors, then relying on the laws ... Maybe someone will tell you something ...

Olga

She divorced her husband five years ago. From marriage, two children 9 and 11 years old. Tired of solving and dragging on all family problems, and besides, my husband began to walk. She left him, as they say, "with one bundle" ... All this time I was equipping a house from scratch, paying off three loans, raising children, it was not easy. Thank God I was lucky and I changed jobs, began to earn more. More or less life began to improve. A year ago I met a man... And Oh God... This is the man I dreamed of. The complete opposite of my ex-husband. And care and attention. One But ... He is a single father ... His wife left him with a child, went to his best friend. In principle, this situation did not frighten me and I thought, well, where are two children there and the third will not be a hindrance ... But it turned out that everything is not so simple ... As a wise woman, I immediately began to look for an approach to the child, bought her toys, completely replaced her wardrobe, the poor child did not even have decent things, everything was washed out so much .... I bought her a bunch of beautiful rubber bands for the garden. I tried my best to please. The girl is 5 years old ... The child is problematic, does not understand anything, in the garden they complain about her that she does not obey, does not want to study .... At home she does whatever she wants, does not respond to comments. He says that he understood and immediately creates again !!!
Mom does not participate in the upbringing of the child in any way, she does not pay alimony, referring to the fact that she pays a joint loan ... Well, okay, God bless her ...
We all lived together for a year ... I thought that she would change and we would live happily ... But nothing changed ...
I was infuriated by her behavior and because of this I was constantly not in the mood, so we began to swear with Alexei. I couldn’t tell him that his daughter infuriates me ... I understand that he loves her more than life ... I thought of leaving, but I love him and he loves me very much .... and he communicates well with my children, with his son goes to chess.... I don't know what to do.. It seems to me that his daughter will never change and I will never be able to love her....

Katerina

Topic to chat. Do you think about the skills of your children? Will explain. A friend's son is a couple of months younger than mine, and now she proudly sends me a video where her baby crawls on the floor like a worm. She happily writes that he is starting to crawl. But for me, it's just a fuss on the carpet))) Or he kicks his ass back, and she thinks that he gets on all fours. I'm just either too critical of my son, or a realist. But until he specifically crawled at least 30 centimeters, I somehow didn’t say that he was starting to crawl. And if he sits with support on one arm - this is not yet sitting. Which camp do you belong to and why?

Akella

And what is in the mind of people who constantly pick up animals from the street in addition to their existing ones? Here I am walking down the street and suddenly - a cat or a dog: homeless, nobody - I don’t take it, I regret it, but I don’t take it, because I don’t take it. already have. And when they bring the second, third - how is it? Fine? No, my conscience does not gnaw at me, I am not ready to arrange a shelter at home. Especially since you can't take them all with you. And you? Are you passing by or are you still increasing the number of pets from the street?

Anonymous

I got a job half a year ago. Child 3.5. He goes to the garden. Walked well in autumn. I went out for a full day. And now, for almost the whole of February and half of March, I have been sitting at home. I got a job through an acquaintance, no one said anything to me for the omissions, but last time they already hinted that something should be done with the sick leave. I found a nanny through an agency, but my mother panicked that a nanny was not needed (my mother has the same commander), she herself meets him from the garden, but the hospital says we will sit in turn, she will be 2 days, I will be three. But often she either flies away somewhere, then she has a theater, then she doesn’t want to at all and everything is unreliable. And nothing good came of it. The nanny eventually found some other shift work and now she can’t come at the click of a button, only on her own weekends. Mom also teases that I will give half of my salary to a nanny. I can't work normally. I don’t want to leave, because now my husband doesn’t earn enough for everything, I buy clothes for myself, for women’s necessities, plus I pay for vacation, I can save for a mortgage, we save up. Mom realized that we just couldn’t save up for an apartment, she stopped reproaching the purchased apartment, before that her husband was constantly baling, what was he thinking about when he created a family. The husband, although he considers himself a breadwinner, is not enough for everything. And I don't want to lose my job, experience, qualifications. And it’s also very difficult mentally to sit with a child for 2 weeks. I'm better at work, but I can't get there. Only goes to the garden for 5 days and again for 2 weeks at home. I am constantly nervous. How to work and look at the child at the same time. How do women do it?