As you sleep, so you will live! (postures while sleeping together): Medical blog of an ambulance doctor. The most common co-sleeping positions

After many months of dating, you finally decide to move in together. With joy you move to your beloved, or he to you, and begin a life together.
In addition to the usual lapping, which all couples go through sooner or later, in addition to household trifles and daily routine, you have to change another important habit. So, the battlefield is the bed.

The presence of another person in bed undoubtedly leaves an imprint on our posture. And if before that we were used to sleeping, spreading wide across the entire bed, then we will have to make room and choose the most convenient option for everyone.
Co-sleeping does not mean that you have to completely abandon your favorite positions. It’s just that their arsenal will be replenished with “together” poses that will be comfortable for both partners.

The poses of partners can tell a lot about their relationship. They are a reflection of the emotional state of the couple, indicate a sense of closeness.
Poses can be distinguished by the duration of the relationship. For example, the poses of people who have recently been together, or the poses of newlyweds, are characterized by passion and ardor. It can be seen that the intensity of feelings, and the peak of the relationship is in full swing. The poses of long-established couples and people in marriage are less emotional. For them, a small touch of bodies in a dream, light touches with hands or feet is enough. Such poses speak of a friendly and calm atmosphere in the family.
Our emotional state also plays a big role in our choice of postures. If you are physically tired and exhausted, then it is likely that you will want to retire somewhere on the edge of the bed. During the period of quarrels and conflicts, couples can sleep not only away from each other, but even on different beds.

There are a number of so-called "standard" positions for partners that can characterize their relationship.

Face to face.

The most sensual pose, speaking of passionate relationships and passion between people. Even at night, they cannot tear themselves away from each other, and they need full contact with a partner. In this position, lovers lie, hugging their bodies, legs are most often intertwined. This position is inherent in the period of tension of relations. For couples with experience, this position is less common, although it is also possible after a long separation. If a couple sleeps in this position for many years, then this suggests that they have retained the emotional upsurge of their relationship. The level of the head may indicate headship in the family - whose head is higher, he is the head of the family.
It is worth noting that such a position is satisfied, uncomfortable for sleeping, and it is difficult to sleep in such conditions.

Hugs from behind.

This position is the most explicit and sexy position. Both sleepers lie on one side, clinging to each other. Legs can be extended or bent at the knees. The partner behind him hugs the second with his arms.
The distance between them indicates proximity - the denser, the closer. A partner hugging a soul mate in a pair is a follower, usually a man, although it happens the other way around. Strong hugs symbolize the degree of leadership, the stronger, the greater the desire to control.
This position does not always involve hugs, sometimes a touch of hands is enough. In this case, we are talking most likely about complete trust between partners, and about freedom of action.
Too much distance may indicate the remoteness of partners, or the presence of some problems in the relationship. Partners often sleep in this position after a quarrel. In this case, the one who turns his back shows his resentment, and the second partner, on the contrary, the desire to reconcile.

Hugs on the back.

A man takes a "royal position" - on his back, such a position is typical for sleeping alone. At the same time, a woman can be in different positions: on her side facing a man, or with her back to him, on her stomach, on her back. With one hand, a man hugs a woman, thereby showing his patronage and the dominant role in the relationship. Most often in this position, the woman's head rests on the man's shoulder, demonstrating complete trust and the need for protection.
The legs in this position can be relaxed and straightened, or intertwined.
If a woman lies on her stomach, hugging a man with one hand, then this indicates her great affection for him.

Back to back.

Most often, this position is characteristic of couples with experience. Partners sleeping at a distance with their backs to each other can have a rather cool, relaxed relationship. The position of the bodies indicates a loss of interest in each other.
But you should not always interpret this pose in this way, perhaps, as mentioned above, this elementary testifies to the fatigue of partners, but in this case, this pose is rarely resorted to.
Touching the arms, legs or back in this position indicates the emotional contact of two people, but at the same time, everyone has their own personal space.

The back-to-back pose, during which the partners touch the buttocks, is called the Zen Pose.

This position of the bodies suggests that the partners are strong personalities who do not claim each other's freedom, but at the same time maintain a close, unbreakable bond.

You should not be so zealous trying on each characteristic of the poses for yourself. Often, due to habit, and due to physical discomfort, our postures may not correspond at all to the emotional intimacy of our relationship. In the end, all people are different.

In a dream, a person cannot control himself, and therefore it is in this state that his body language will be most truthful. Brazilian scientists have even found out the correspondence between postures while sleeping together and relationships in a couple. Let's look at the most common positions that lovers take in a dream.

The meaning of sleeping positions for two

Pose "spoon" or "ladle"- a man hugs a girl from behind, while the couple sleeps, clinging to each other, their heads are directed in one direction. These positions for sleeping together are quite common and have the meaning: "We complement each other." If a couple likes to fall asleep in this position, then this may mean a desire to improve relations after a period of cooling. Also, this pose is taken by people who have stable relationships, who value them very much. Most likely, it was not easy for the couple to reach the existing position, perhaps, after an unsuccessful experience, both thought that the path to happiness was ordered to them. And now both are very afraid of losing what they have.
Pose "pursuit". Similar to the “spoon” position, but here the woman hugs the man. Apparently, in a relationship, the lady is the leader, and the man needs more manifestations of tenderness from her. If the partner's head seeks to avoid touching, then this means an attempt to increase or maintain their personal space.
Pose "Abyss"- a man and a woman sleep, turned away, each on their own half of the bed. This situation indicates a quarrel or a protracted misunderstanding. Although, if a couple considers such positions for sleeping together to be the most comfortable, then this may indicate an impending break in relations.
Pose "Chanel"- partners lie with their backs to each other, touching their hips. This position is considered the most comfortable for sleeping couples who are united by a strong bond. So people with different types of temperament and different habits can fall asleep. They are together, but each of them is a person. If a couple sleeps in this position, touching their heads, shoulders and back, but leaving free space in the hips, then this betrays lovers with too different views of the world. Therefore, it is difficult to say anything about the future in these relations. If spouses take such a pose, then this indicates their desire to protect themselves from the outside world.
Pose "love hug"- the couple sleeps in an embrace, tightly clinging to each other, intertwining limbs. This pose is typical for the beginning of a relationship and speaks of emotions overwhelming partners. If in such a position there is a small distance between a man and a woman, then this indicates a readiness to live together and not get on each other's nerves. In this pair, both are ready to accept the lack of each other.
Pose "roof"- partners sleep on their backs, one hugs the other by the shoulders or head. Such positions during sleep together demonstrate the closeness of the couple, but at the same time they indicate a lack of sexual interest, since there is no contact in the hips.
Pose "cradle"- the girl lies on the chest of a man hugging her. This posture speaks of a stable union and harmonious relationships. A woman feels the protection of her man, and he appreciates her care and support.
Pose "by the handle" - partners sleep on their backs, holding hands. This is usually how lovers sleep, who are very similar in their temperament. They can be similar in appearance - in height or physique. The position on the back indicates a sense of security, but at the same time, partners need physical contact.
Pose "independence"- partners sleep on their stomachs separately from each other. The hand of one of them touches the body of the other. This posture speaks of the desire of both to maintain independence, of the fear of becoming attached to each other. And touching with your hand indicates a desire to find support in order to get rid of this fear.
Pose "face to face"- partners fall asleep on their side, facing each other, without touching their limbs. This position indicates the presence of a strong bond between lovers, but they are forced to spend a lot of time separately.

As you can see, the positions that you take in a dream with your loved one can tell a lot. But still, you should not be too categorical in your assessments, firstly, we still try to take a more comfortable sleeping position, and not one that is more in line with our emotional state. And, secondly, the meaning of the pose of the spouses can radically change any gesture. For example, the “cradle” position speaks of harmonious relationships, but if in this position a man holds a woman by the hand lying on his chest, as if closing his heart from a lady’s pen, the meaning changes. This position will indicate that the man is afraid to let the girl get too close.

The sleeping positions of a couple, the meaning of which some psychologists interpret in different ways, can indicate the feelings of lovers. During sleep, each person takes a certain position of the body. For those who sleep more than one, it will be interesting to know if the sleeping positions of a couple have a bearing on the development of a relationship. A sleeping person cannot deceive body language.

What Do Sleep Poses Say?

The sleep positions of lovers are especially eloquent. According to the British psychologist Corrin Sweet, couples quite often get used to one particular position in accordance with their characters and personal preferences. Any change in posture reflects a change in relationship. Based on years of research, Sweet came to the conclusion that after the first impulses of passion subside, a man and a woman often turn their backs on each other. It is a mistake to believe that in this case love begins to cool down.

The position in which partners sleep with their backs to each other is not the only one. In psychology, there are several positions that lovers choose for co-sleeping. According to the outstanding scientist and psychoanalyst Samuel Dunkel, waking up in the morning, a person should pay attention not only to what he dreamed, but also to the emotions that cover him, what position he and his partner take - all this will help solve many vital problems. Problems.

How do lovers sleep?

Some basic sleep positions and their meaning will let you know if the couple has hidden problems.

Approximately 33% of couples prefer to sleep with their backs to each other. This option suggests that lovers are close to each other, but, at the same time, self-sufficient and independent. They accept and respect each other's habits.

On average, 21% of couples sleep in roughly the same position, with the only difference being that their backs are touching. This situation is typical for those men and women who relatively recently began their relationship. It says that lovers are comfortable with each other.

10 sleeping positions for a couple in love

In the "spoon" position, both members of the couple take the fetal position. It is typical for those who are experiencing the first year of marriage or just living together. Partners feel a strong sexual connection, their relationship is filled with security.

There are two options for spoons. The first one (preferred by about 15% of couples) suggests that in a dream a man hugs a woman, as if taking on the role of a protector and leader.

The second option - in a dream, a woman hugs a man. In this case, the leading position in the relationship belongs to her.

About 8% of couples sleep facing each other. Looking at this situation, we can say that lovers need one-on-one contact, moreover, an intimate conversation.

The man and woman are turned to face each other, their legs are intertwined for some time in the “knot” position, after which they are separated in most cases. All this is evidence that the relationship in a couple is built on love, intimacy and sexual activity, while each of the lovers loves and respects independence.

The pose "lovers" is similar to the previous version. The difference is that the lovers do not separate from each other throughout the night. Such relationships are an example of romance. A man and a woman, as it were, say that they want to spend as much time as possible together, appreciating every second of being together.

Quite often you can see in the bed scenes of Hollywood films. This position is for those who are just starting to build relationships, or are reviving them.

In the "superwoman" position, the partner takes the form of a starfish, while the man is given a modest place on the edge of the bed. This option is chosen by women who prefer to take leadership into their own hands and take the lead in bed.

In another case, the partner prefers to take the form of a starfish - the “superman” pose. Thus, men try to take a leading position, and women give their consent to this.

Alarms

Lovers' relationships go through different stages. Difficulties arise from time to time. Men and women should pay attention to the relationship if the partner has drastically changed his habit of sleeping in one position or another. This may be an occasion to reconsider some points in the relationship.

If in the first months after the wedding, one of the partners prefers to sleep in the far corner of the bed, this may indicate that the relationship is going through hard times. Between the couple, intimacy has weakened, an emotional split is observed, love is weakening.

A very alarming signal when the partner not only moves to the edge of the bed, but also slouches his back. This suggests that he / she simply cannot stand the sight of another.

The position of each of the partners during sleep can reflect his feelings for his beloved. Treat this carefully!

The posture of the human body can tell a lot about it. So, Dr. Samuel Dunkell, who is a psychoanalyst, wrote a whole book about this called Sleeping Postures: Night Body Language. The famous doctor graduated from the medical faculty of the University of Zurich in 1954, and has repeatedly undergone psychiatric practice on the basis of various hospitals. And today, Dunkell is the director of the mental health center. Dr. Dunkell has long been of the opinion that the positions of partners during sleep can understand what is happening in their relationship. When a person sleeps, he cannot control his position, so the subconscious "speaks" for him. Analyzing the poses of couples, one can already understand at an early stage that disagreements and misunderstandings occur between loved ones. Let us consider in more detail what the sleeping postures can tell, according to the opinion of a well-known psychoanalyst.

There are some of the most common sleeping positions. Let's take a closer look at what each of them means.

Pose "spoon"

This position is characterized by the fact that one partner hugs the other while sleeping from behind. The position of their bodies, when viewed from above, resembles the pose of an "embryo" or folded spoons, since both of them have their legs slightly tucked in, and their loved ones are pressed tightly against each other.
This position of the bodies during sleep can most often be found in newlyweds or couples in love, whose relationship is just flaring up.
There are two versions of this pose:

The man behind - means his dominant position in relations with his beloved, the desire to patronize and take care of his beloved partner. It can also be a manifestation of some jealousy on the part of a partner towards a loved one.
A woman behind - means that in a couple a woman takes on a "educational" role in relation to a man, and also characterizes her desire to be closer to her partner. Such a woman will always become a good support and right hand for a man in marriage.
A lot in the “back hug” pose can also be said by how the legs and arms are located in relation to each other in a couple. In this case, the position characterizes the quality of sexual relations with a loved one.
The partner's hand touching the inguinal region indicates that intimacy in a couple is intense and vivid.
If the partner's hand lies on the stomach, this is a symbol of platonic intimacy, which has no sexual overtones.
If the hand is located in the chest area, this position emphasizes tenderness towards your loved one.

Pose "back to back"

Such an arrangement in bed of partners, when both are turned with respect to each other with their backs, is a fairly common position that can be observed in married couples for a very long time.
There are several options for this posture:

Partners are at a distance and do not touch any part of the body - this position may indicate the complete acceptance of each other, the independence of partners. It can, however, also be a manifestation of some coldness in a couple, when passion subsides, and both people in a couple only show their mutual understanding and love in plain sight.
Touching one part of the body with a back-to-back pose indicates that loved ones trust each other, are emotionally close, but everyone claims personal space.
Tight pressing to each other in this position is more common in young couples, characterizes their physical and emotional attachment.

Pose "Hugs"

This position is characterized by the fact that both partners are turned to face each other, hugging and pressing their bodies. It does not occur very often and more often in the initial stages of a relationship. It is difficult to sleep in this position throughout the night. She is not physically comfortable. Partners who usually fall asleep in this position later change it to another. The following positions are possible:

Partners are facing each other, but lie at a distance - this may indicate the need for an intimate or private conversation.
Partners fall asleep in such a way that their legs are intertwined, but later they separate them - this characterizes the fact that the couple is emotionally and physically close enough, but strive for some independence;
Throughout the night, the couple sleeps in an embrace - this is how only people who are strongly attached to each other, real romantics or loved ones who have been apart for a long time can sleep.

romantic pose

There are several options for positioning in this position.

The man is in the supine position, the woman lies on her side, putting her hand on him. The man, in turn, hugs his beloved. This variety indicates that the man in the union is happy, ready to take care and protect his partner.
One person from the pair lies on his back, and the second is located next to him, his legs tucked under him, being in the “embryo” position. This situation characterizes the need for support from your partner, which for some reason cannot be expressed verbally.
One person sleeps on his back, which is on his stomach, with his hand on his partner. Such a position testifies to the driven role of the person who touches the partner's hand.

Changing positions over the years

Just as relationships in marriage cannot be smooth throughout life, so the two spouses periodically change depending on various factors. This does not mean that there is discord in the family. In any normal marriage, this is a common and natural phenomenon.
The most intimate and intimate sleep positions of a couple include the “hug” position, which after a couple of months is replaced by a more comfortable, but no less close “spoon” position.
Usually, after 5 years, young spouses give each other more freedom and independence, and in the “spoon” position, the distance between the partner increases. Now, to emphasize the proximity to each other, it is enough to touch with one part of the body.
After 10 years, partners often sleep with their backs turned to each other, often changing positions during the night, choosing a more comfortable one for themselves.
After 15 years of living together, sleep is often observed in the so-called Hollywood bed, when everyone has not only their own mattress, but also a blanket. Co-sleeping is more like two people sleeping side by side without intertwining with each other.
The distance that increases in bed between spouses over the years is not necessarily evidence that there is a discord in the relationship. It's just that partners have learned to trust each other without being tied to physical contact, because physical and psychological connections are often completely unrelated to each other. Like, for example, in a crowded bus, where people can be in close contact with each other, but emotionally they do not interact in any way.

Anxious sleeping positions

You can understand that a conflict is brewing in a marriage by changing the postures of one or two partners at once. As a rule, relationships between people will always manifest themselves in bed during sleep.

If immediately after the wedding one of the newlyweds strives to sleep in “their” corner of the bed, you should think about the reciprocity of love feelings.
If one of the partners strives to sleep on the very edge of the bed, while still turning his back to him and bending over, this is an alarming sign that even the sight of a partner causes dislike in him.
A similar situation is also observed if the partner, having moved to the edge of the bed, hangs his arm or leg beyond it, as if trying to escape and completely sleep separately from his beloved. Perhaps in everyday life, resentment and omissions accumulated for a long time and found such an unusual way out during sleep.
The presence of insomnia in one or two partners also symbolizes often conflict situations in a couple, when spouses cannot fall asleep because of thoughts that overwhelm them.
If the partners slept in the “spoon” position for a long time, and then one of the bottoms sharply began to protest against this type of joint sleep, the second partner should urgently think and take measures to prevent a brewing conflict in the pair.

According to psychologists, it is important in what position you wake up, and not in what you fall asleep. Body language often tells us much more than words. Being able to analyze your shared sleeping positions with your loved one gives you a chance to recognize the problem in its infancy and take the necessary measures before a serious quarrel develops.

List of used literature:

Malcolm N. Sleep state. Per. from English. - M.: IG "Progress-Culture", 1993. - 176 p.
Ronzhin E. A. Psychology of dreams. - Rostov n/a: Phoenix, 2015 - p. 13
Shpork P. Son. Why we sleep like this and how we do it best Moscow, Binom Publishing House. Knowledge Laboratory”. 2012

10 SLEEPING POSES THAT CLEARLY CHARACTERIZE THE RELATIONSHIP WITHIN A COUPLE

Interesting? Then we look and find ourselves, read the meaning and draw conclusions. Are you doing well or is it worth thinking about and changing something in your relationship with your loved one. Here it is important to analyze the position in which people sleep at dawn, and not the one in which they fall asleep.

1. "Reclaiming space"
If the way you sleep resembles option "1" - people who love each other prefer, but their relationship still requires close attention. Psychologists note that the one who sleeps on his back does not need to see his partner, and the one who sleeps on his stomach is stubborn and somewhat closed. At the same time, the interlacing of legs indicates that people have obligations to each other.

2 "Back to back"

The couple strives to maintain personal space without losing contact. This posture indicates a stable and healthy relationship, as if emphasizing their symmetry. For people who sleep in this way, the presence of a partner nearby is a prerequisite for comfort.

3 "You're far away from me"

This position signals that something is clearly wrong in the relationship of the couple. The lack of contact between bodies and the fact that partners turn away from each other may mean that people seek more personal freedom or see each other as a competitor. If the body is tense, and the hands are “closed”, the couple probably quarreled recently and does not intend to reconcile. If the body is relaxed, then there is no tension in the relationship; most likely, people trust each other and respect the partner's personal space.

4 "At arm's length"

"Spontaneous relationships" - such a conclusion was made by psychologists, analyzing this position for sleeping. Each partner respects the privacy of the other. Most likely, each of them has their own friends, they go to parties separately, but at the same time they trust each other without limit. An outstretched hand means a readiness to protect your partner, and palms under the cheek indicate that the person is calm and comfortable. If there was a conflict between the couple, then such a pose may indicate an attempt to reconcile.

5 "I look at you like in a mirror"

A couple who sleeps in this position usually boasts a wonderful relationship. Routine and everyday problems cannot negatively affect relationships within her. In this position, people who have an active sex life sleep, while being good friends and wonderful partners.

6 "Don't leave, stay with me"

Most likely, this couple strives for freedom, but the hand on the shoulder speaks of the manifestation of love. It is a necessity to feel your partner. So, it is this feeling that a person lacks most of all. A person who sleeps in this position with his back to a partner, according to psychologists, has an overestimated self-esteem.

7 "Domination"

Body language experts note that such hugs are evidence of love and affection between spouses. Most likely, the couple has a great sex life. In this case, one of the partners prefers to dominate the relationship.

8 "Spoon"

If a partner hugs another from behind, it means that he shows attention and care, psychologists are sure. Such a couple feels comfortable and safe together. At the same time, the relationship between people who sleep in this position is far from ideal. Most likely, there is some uncertainty in the relationship.

9 "The plexus of hands, the plexus of legs"

Experts say that when a couple intertwines their legs and arms in a dream, this indicates unbridled passion in a relationship. As a rule, couples sleep in this position at the beginning of a relationship, when they want to feel as one. Often, jealous people sleep in this position.

10 "Half for you and half for me"

This position indicates that a person does not seek to demonstrate love for his soul mate. Usually, someone who needs self-affirmation, including in relationships, tries to occupy more space in the bed. In addition, experts note that stubborn people who seek leadership in relationships and want to keep everything under control usually sleep with their hands raised above their heads.