Spock to read. Benjamin spock baby and care for him. Development of visual memory

Benjamin Spock
Child and care

Spock Benjamin
Child and care

Benjamin Spock
Child and care
Content
FROM THE AUTHOR
CLOTHES AND OTHER REQUIRED THINGS
FEEDING THE NEWBORN
BREAST-FEEDING
FORTUNE FEEDING
VITAMINS AND WATER
CHANGES IN DIET AND REGIMEN
TRANSITION FROM PATCH TO CUP
DAILY CHILD CARE
DIFFICULTIES OF THE FIRST YEAR OF LIFE
OTHER CONCERN
DEVELOPMENT OF YOUR CHILD
POTTY TRAINING
ONE-YEAR-OLD BABY
NUTRIENTS
FOOD PRODUCTS
HOW TO DEAL WITH YOUNG CHILDREN
2-YEAR-OLD CHILD
FROM SIX TO ELEVEN
SCHOOL
Puberty
NUTRITION AND DEVELOPMENT ISSUES
DISEASES
FIRST AID
SPECIAL PROBLEMS
From the author
About parents
Dear Parents!
Most of you have the opportunity, if necessary, to see a doctor. The doctor knows your child and only he can give you the best advice. Sometimes he only needs a look and one or two questions to understand what is happening with your child.
This book is not intended to teach you how to diagnose or treat yourself. The author wants to give you only a general idea of the child and his needs. True, for those parents who, due to exceptional circumstances, find it difficult to get to the doctor, some sections give advice on first aid. Better the advice of a book than no advice! But one cannot rely only on a book if one can get real medical help.
I also want to stress that everything in this book should not be taken too literally. There are no similar children, just as there are no similar parents. Diseases in children proceed differently; The problems of upbringing also take on different forms in different families. All I could do was describe only the most general cases. Remember that you know your child well, and I do not know him at all.
*trust yourself*
1. You know a lot more than you think.
Your baby will be born soon. Maybe he was already born. You are happy and full of enthusiasm. But if you don't have enough experience, you may be afraid that you won't be able to handle childcare. You have heard a lot of talk about raising children, you have read special literature on this topic, you have talked with doctors. The problem of caring for a child may seem too complicated for you. You find out how the child needs vitamins and vaccinations. One friend tells you that you need to start giving eggs as before, because they contain iron, and another that you have to wait with eggs, because they cause diathesis. You are told that a child can be spoiled if you take him in your arms often, and that, on the contrary, you need to caress him a lot. Some say that fairy tales excite the child, while others say that fairy tales have a beneficial effect on children.
Don't take too literally everything your friends tell you. Don't be afraid to trust your own common sense. Raising a child will not be difficult if you do not complicate it yourself. Trust your intuition and follow the advice of your pediatrician. The main thing that a child needs is your love and care. And it is much more valuable than theoretical knowledge. Whenever you pick up a baby, even if you do it awkwardly at first, every time you change his diaper, bathe him, feed him, talk to him, smile at him, the child feels that he belongs to you, and you to him. . No one in the world but you can give him that feeling. You might find it surprising that when studying parenting methods, scientists have come to the conclusion that good, loving parents intuitively choose the most correct decisions. Moreover, self-confidence is the key to success. Be natural and don't be afraid to make mistakes.
*Parents are people too*
2. Parents have their own needs.
Books about child care, like this book, talk primarily about the many needs of a child. Therefore, inexperienced parents sometimes fall into despair, having read about the huge work that they have to do. It seems to them that the author stands on the side of the children and blames the parents if something goes wrong. But it would only be fair to dedicate as many pages to the needs of the parents, the failures they constantly face, their fatigue, the insensitivity on the part of the children that hurts the parents so painfully. Raising a child is long and hard work, and parents have human needs just like their children. 3. Children are "easy" and "difficult".
It is known that children are born with different temperaments, and this does not depend on your desires. You have to accept the child for who he is. But parents also have their own established characters, which are no longer easy to change. Some parents prefer quiet, obedient children and will have a hard time with an energetic and noisy child. Others easily cope with a restless boy and a fighter and will be disappointed if their child grows up "quiet". Parents try to adapt to their child and do everything in their power for him. 4. At best, hard work and the rejection of many pleasures await you.
There is a lot of work to take care of a child. You need to cook food for him, wash diapers and clothes, constantly clean up after him, separate fighters and console the beaten, listen to endless obscure stories, participate in children's games and read books to children that are not at all interesting to you, take tedious walks around the zoo, take children to school. and to children's matinees, help them prepare lessons, go to parent-teacher meetings in the evenings when you are very tired.
You will spend a large part of the family budget on children, because of children you will not be able to go to the theater, cinema, lectures, visits and evenings often. You, of course, would not change places with childless parents for anything in the world, but still you lack your former freedom. Of course, people become parents not because they want to be martyrs, but because they love children and see them as flesh of their own flesh. They also love children because their parents also loved them as children. Taking care of children and watching their development give many parents, despite hard work, the greatest satisfaction in life, especially if the child turns out to be a wonderful person as a result. Children are our creations, the guarantee of our immortality. All other achievements in our life cannot be compared with the happiness of seeing how worthy people grow out of our children. 5. Don't need too many sacrifices.
Some young parents believe that they should completely give up their freedom and all pleasures simply on principle and not on practical grounds. Even sneaking out of the house when given the opportunity to get some pleasure, they feel too guilty. Such feelings, but to a lesser extent, are natural for all parents in the first weeks after the birth of a child: everything is so new and you can't think of anything else. But too much self-sacrifice will not benefit you or the child. If parents are completely occupied only with their child, constantly worrying only about him, they become uninteresting for others and even for each other. They complain that they are confined within four walls because of the child, although they themselves are to blame for this. They involuntarily feel some dislike for their child, although he did not demand so many sacrifices. As a result, such parents expect too much from the child in gratitude for their labors. We must try not to go to extremes. You must honestly fulfill your parental duties, but also not deprive yourself of such pleasures as will not harm your child. Then you will be able to love your child more and show your love for him with greater pleasure. 6. Parents have the right to expect gratitude from their children.
Since, with the advent of children, parents really have to give up a lot, they naturally have the right to expect gratitude from their children. But not verbal expressions of gratitude for the fact that they were born and raised - this would be too little. Parents expect from their children responsiveness, love and desire to inherit their life principles and ideals. They want to see these qualities in their children not for selfish reasons, but because they dream that children grow up as equal and happy members of society.
It happens that parents cannot decisively stop the bad behavior of the child, as they are compliant by nature or are afraid of losing his love. Deep down, such parents condemn the child and get angry with him, but do not know how to do it right. The child understands that they are annoyed and this worries him, frightens him, makes him feel guilty, but at the same time makes him even more demanding and angry. For example, if a child likes to go to bed late in the evening, and the mother is afraid to deprive him of this pleasure, he can tyrannize his poor mother for several months, refusing to go to bed until late at night. The mother will definitely feel a sense of hidden rage towards the child for his bullying. If the mother resolutely does not allow this to the child, she herself will be amazed at how quickly he will turn from a tyrant into an obedient angel and become much more pleasant for others.
In other words, parents cannot truly love their children if they cannot make them behave properly, and children themselves cannot be happy if they do not behave properly. 7. Parents should get angry sometimes.
Some young idealistic parents think that if they want to be good parents, their patience and love for their innocent baby must be limitless. But it's just not possible. If a child is screaming for hours despite your best efforts to calm him down, you cannot sympathize endlessly with him. You begin to see him as a stubborn, ungrateful creature, and you can't help but get really angry. Or the older child did something that (he knows very well!) should not have done. Maybe he really wanted to break something or play with the children in another yard, or maybe he was angry with you because you refused him something, or he is jealous of his younger brother because that it gets more attention. And now he just does something to spite you. When a child breaks one of the basic rules you set, you are unlikely to be able to remain absolutely calm. All good parents should teach their children what is good and what is bad. You were also taught this as a child. The child broke a rule you set or broke something you owned. Your child, whose character you are far from indifferent to, did wrong, and you are hopelessly indignant. The child naturally expects this and will not be offended if your anger is justified.
It happens that you do not immediately realize that you are losing patience. Suppose your child behaves badly in the morning: either he says that he does not like breakfast, or he allegedly accidentally knocks over a glass of milk, then plays with a thing that you forbid him to touch and breaks it, sticks to his younger brother . You try to ignore his behavior, which costs you superhuman effort. Then, when the drop overflows the cup, you explode and are shocked by your own rage. Perhaps a little later, having already cooled down, you will understand that the child should have been firmly stopped or punished at the very beginning. He asked for it himself. You, with your good intentions, by all means to keep patience, only incited him to more and more provocations.
We all sometimes get angry with our children when we have troubles and failures, as in one comedy, where a father comes home upset and starts to find fault with his wife, who in turn scolds her son for something that usually does not cause her displeasure, and the son takes it out on his younger sister. 8. It's better to be honest about being angry.
So far, we have talked about the fact that from time to time parents inevitably lose their patience. But it is important to discuss a related question: can parents safely admit this and give vent to their anger?
Parents who are not too strict with themselves do not hesitate to admit that they are annoyed. I heard a very good mother, an open and honest person, half-jokingly say to her friend: "I simply cannot stay under the same roof with this little devil for a minute! I would love to spank him properly!" She had no intention of carrying out her threats, but she was not ashamed to admit such thoughts to others and to herself. It became easier for her when she openly expressed her thoughts. Next time, she will try to stop the child decisively when he begins to misbehave.
Parents who strive to be perfect seem to be reluctant to think that human patience is not unlimited, and believe that they should not allow themselves to become angry. If they do get angry, they feel deeply guilty or desperately try to reassure themselves that they are not angry at all. You try to suppress your irritation, and this leads to the fact that it results in internal tension, fatigue or headache. It happens that a mother who cannot admit that at times she feels dislike for her child begins to imagine that danger awaits him everywhere. She unnecessarily protects him from infections, from traffic, constantly fussing over him, not realizing that this can interfere with the development of independence in him.
I discuss the problems that arise when parents are afraid to vent their irritation, not only to ease the conscience of the parents. The fact is that everything that upsets parents upsets their children. When parents feel that antagonistic feelings towards children are too terrible to admit openly, children also hide their antagonism towards parents. Children develop fear of imaginary dangers. They are afraid of insects, or they refuse to go to school, or they are afraid to let their parents go. These fears are only an outward expression of antagonism towards parents, which children do not dare to admit.
In other words, the child will be happier with those parents who are not afraid to give vent to their anger, because then it will be easier for the child to give vent to his feelings. If you are rightly indignant and express everything you think, both you and the child will feel better and everything will return to its original place. I do not mean to say that you will always be right in your antagonism to the child. Often we meet rude parents who do not hesitate to scold the child all day long and even beat him for no serious reason. I spoke about the feelings of too conscientious parents who love their child.
If your child is dear to you, but, nevertheless, he constantly annoys you (whether you express it openly or not), then your nervous system is overstrained and you need to see a psychiatrist. In addition, your irritability may be caused by some external factor, and not by the behavior of the child himself.
1

The famous radical way to deal with a child who does not want to fall asleep.

“The treatment is very simple: put the child to bed at the appointed time, bid him good night in a gentle voice, leave the room and do not return. Most children scream angrily for 20-30 minutes on the first night, and then, seeing that nothing is happening, they suddenly fall asleep. The next day they will only cry for 10 minutes, and by the third day they usually don't cry at all."

Modern psychologist, specialist in parent-child relations in the book “Secret support. Attachment in the life of a child” criticizes the idea of leaving children alone. She recalls that in many traditional cultures, babies spend the entire first year of life cuddled up to their mother. According to Petranovskaya, if the fears about “being spoiled, getting used to” would be true, then children almost up to adulthood would insist on being carried in their arms: “However, observations say exactly the opposite: these babies are much more independent and independent by two years than their urban counterparts.”

No. 2. Refusal of night feeding

“If the baby is already a month old and weighs about 4.5 kg, but still wakes up for night feeding, I think it would be wiser not to rush to him with milk. ... Generally speaking, a child weighing about 4.5 kg and feeding normally during the day does not require night feeding.

Today, doctors are convinced that you should not stop night feeding so early: they stimulate the production of the hormone prolactin, which is responsible for the formation of breast milk. It is important to keep night feedings while the baby needs them. WHO also recommends feeding on demand - that is, as often as the child wants, day and night.

Number 3. Ignoring crying

If the child is naughty or crying, "according to Spock", you do not need to react to this: "Some children easily vomit when they are excited. This frightens the mother, she looks at the child with an anxious look, hurries to clean up after him, tries to be more attentive to him and next time immediately runs to him as soon as he screams ... If the mother decided to teach him to fall asleep without screaming and motion sickness, then she should not deviate from the planned plan and not enter the child.

However, the results of a recent study conducted by American scientists indicate that a mother can boldly, without fear of anything, follow her maternal instinct. The more "hugs" and "handles", the more, the more mother's attention and care, the more successful, self-confident, kind, sensitive, mentally and physically healthy person your child will become when he grows up. The researchers came to such conclusions, data on childhood and adult life of more than 600 people.

No. 4. Sleep on your stomach

“It is advisable to teach a child to sleep on his stomach from birth, if he does not mind. Subsequently, when he learns to roll over, he will be able to change the position himself if he wants.

In the 21st century, pediatricians say that a child should sleep exclusively on his back and on a hard mattress. The sleep of a baby on his stomach is dangerous: it is a syndrome of sudden infant death.

No. 5. Orange juice as a first food

“Physicians generally recommend introducing orange juice into a baby's diet at a few months of age,” says the book Baby and Care. “You can squeeze juice from oranges yourself or use canned juice ... Usually, until 5-6 months, children drink juice from a nipple, and then from a cup.”

No. 6. Meat supplements from 2 months

“Research has shown that meat is very beneficial for children even in their first year of life,” writes Dr. Spock. - Many doctors now recommend giving meat from 2-6 months. Meat for a small child is either turned in a meat grinder several times, or rubbed through a sieve, or rubbed on a grater. Therefore, it is easy for a child to eat it, even while he has no teeth.

Two months is certainly too early to start complementary foods - especially with meat. The pediatrician recommends starting meat complementary foods no earlier than 8-9 months.

No. 7. Too big vests

About clothes for a newborn in Benjamin Spock's bestseller, you can read the following: “Nightgowns. You will need 3 to 6 shirts. Buy immediately the size for the age of 1 year. Undershirts. You will need 3-6 vests in size for 1 year.

The newborn, of course, grows very quickly, but not in size will bring both the child and the mother a real inconvenience.

“Remember that you know your child well, but I don’t know him at all”

Much of the advice in The Child and Care is naive and even dangerous for today's realities. However, Spock was the first pediatrician who went against the conventional wisdom that raising a child should first of all develop discipline. His ideas for their time became revolutionary and influenced many generations of parents, making them more sensitive to their children.

In the preface to his famous book, Benjamin Spock emphasizes that you should not blindly follow all the advice given in the book.

There are no similar children, just as there are no similar parents. Diseases in children proceed differently; The problems of upbringing also take on different forms in different families. All I could do was describe only the most general cases. Remember that you know your child well, and I do not know him at all.
Benjamin Spock
"Baby and Care"

Child and care

Preface to the Russian edition (1970)

The fate of Dr. Benjamin Spock is unusual. The celebrated pediatrician, whose book The Baby and Care has sold 20,000,000 copies in the United States and serves as a desk guide for American mothers, has decided to take responsibility for how children raised with his advice act when they reach adulthood. .

Before his eyes is the Vietnamese adventure of the US ruling class.

Burnt towns and villages... destroyed crops... napalm-stricken children, women, old people... the brutality of the American soldiers... But the heroic people of Vietnam are not broken.

The whole world has seen with its own eyes that a people cannot be brought to its knees if it fights for its independence, for its freedom, for the happiness of its children.

Could a humanist, a pediatrician who devoted his whole life to protecting the health of children, get past the dirty war in Vietnam? And he becomes an active fighter for peace. He did not hesitate to declare that the war in Vietnam was hopeless from a military point of view, vicious from a moral point of view, and doomed to defeat from a political point of view. Isn't it scandalous that America spends crazy money on the war and does nothing to end poverty at home.

Dr. Spock, along with other progressive Americans, signs an appeal to the Americans, in which he declares his duty to provide moral support and material assistance to young Americans who refuse to join the army under threat of imprisonment. American lawyers publicly stated that Dr. Spock and his associates had the right to agitate against military service, since American citizens should not participate in an illegal and unjust war, and that they have the right to oppose their government waging such a war. Participation in it is a serious international crime.

Dr. Spock is about 70 years old. He travels all over the country, giving lectures, in which he tells not only about how to care for children, but also about how to save their lives, save them from death in the war. He speaks to those who raise children, uses his book, his advice.

Parents! Do your best to bring Peace to Vietnam, Dr. Spock urges.

And his call is not fruitless. Young progressive America understands where the Vietnamese adventure of the American monopolies is leading, and returns their draft cards by the hundreds or publicly burns them.

The U.S. government was prosecuting Dr. Spock for conspiracy to induce U.S. youth to refuse to fight in Vietnam.

The American Humanist Association unanimously awarded Benjamin Spock the honorary title of Humanist of the Year for his tireless work against the war.

Such is Dr. Benjamin Spock, who, according to the world community, personifies the honor and conscience of America, and whose book we bring to the attention of the Soviet people.

Preface to the second edition (1971)

The first edition of B. Spock's book aroused great interest among the Soviet reader. This is explained by the fact that the problems of raising children concern people of all countries, of all ages. There is no person who would remain indifferent to this responsible and difficult task.

B. Spock is an American pediatrician with extensive life experience. He knows well what difficulties parents expect when raising children, what difficult questions arise in this case. This is how he begins his book: “Soon you will have a baby.” Dr. Spock sets the task - to tell about how to raise a child, starting from the day of his birth. All parents are interested in how to ensure that the child is healthy, what needs to be done for this, what measures to take if he is sick, how to determine that he is unwell.

The author pays much attention, as it were, to trifles: how to find out why the child is crying, how to calm him down, how to feed him. But such trifles make up a complex of education, so advice is very valuable, especially for parents who have not previously encountered children.

Advice to parents to observe the formation of the child's psyche is very important. The book touches upon problems, gives recommendations to parents of "difficult" children.

Dr. Spock knows well that it is not enough to raise children, they must also be brought up correctly, one cannot cripple their vulnerable psyche. That is why he is so actively opposed to the aggression of the American imperialists in Vietnam, quite rightly believing that such a war can bring nothing but grief and misfortune to the families of both the Vietnamese and the Americans.

V. V. Kovanov Academician of the USSR Academy of Medical Sciences, Deputy Chairman of the Soviet Peace Committee, Professor

Dear Parents! Most of you have the opportunity, if necessary, to see a doctor. The doctor knows your child and only he can give you the best advice. Sometimes he only needs a look and one or two questions to understand what is happening with your child.

This book is not intended to teach you how to diagnose or treat yourself. The author wants to give you only a general idea of the child and his needs. True, for those parents who, due to exceptional circumstances, find it difficult to get to a doctor, some sections give advice on first aid. Better the advice of a book than no advice! But one cannot rely only on a book if one can get real medical help.

I also want to stress that everything in this book should not be taken too literally. There are no similar children, just as there are no similar parents. Diseases in children proceed differently; The problems of upbringing also take on different forms in different families. All I could do was describe only the most general cases. Remember that you know your child well, and I do not know him at all.

About parents

trust yourself

1. You know a lot more than you think.

Your baby will be born soon. Maybe he was already born. You are happy and full of enthusiasm. But if you don't have enough experience, you may be afraid that you won't be able to handle childcare. You have heard a lot of talk about raising children, you have read special literature on this topic, you have talked with doctors. The problem of caring for a child may seem too complicated for you. You find out how the child needs vitamins and vaccinations. One friend tells you that you need to start giving eggs as before, because they contain iron, and another that you have to wait with eggs, because they cause diathesis. You are told that a child can be spoiled if you take him in your arms often, and that, on the contrary, you need to caress him a lot. Some say that fairy tales excite the child, while others say that fairy tales have a beneficial effect on children.

Don't take too literally everything your friends tell you. Don't be afraid to trust your own common sense. Raising a child will not be difficult if you do not complicate it yourself. Trust your intuition and follow the advice of your pediatrician. The main thing that a child needs is your love and care. And it is much more valuable than theoretical knowledge. Whenever you pick up a baby, even if you do it awkwardly at first, every time you change his diaper, bathe him, feed him, talk to him, smile at him, the child feels that he belongs to you, and you to him. . No one in the world but you can give him that feeling. You might find it surprising that when studying parenting methods, scientists have come to the conclusion that good, loving parents intuitively choose the most correct decisions. Moreover, self-confidence is the key to success. Be natural and don't be afraid to make mistakes.

Parents are people too

2. Parents have their own needs.

Books about child care, like this book, talk primarily about the many needs of a child. Therefore, inexperienced parents sometimes fall into despair, having read about the huge work that they have to do. It seems to them that the author stands on the side of the children and blames the parents if something goes wrong. But it would only be fair to dedicate as many pages to the needs of the parents, the failures they constantly face, their fatigue, the insensitivity on the part of the children that hurts the parents so painfully. Raising a child is long and hard work, and parents have human needs just like their children.

3. Children are "easy" and "difficult".

Child and care

Preface to the Russian edition (1970)

Before his eyes is the Vietnamese adventure of the US ruling class.

Burnt towns and villages... destroyed crops... napalm-stricken children, women, old people... the brutality of the American soldiers... But the heroic people of Vietnam are not broken.

The whole world has seen with its own eyes that a people cannot be brought to its knees if it fights for its independence, for its freedom, for the happiness of its children.

Parents! Do your best to bring Peace to Vietnam, Dr. Spock urges.

The U.S. government was prosecuting Dr. Spock for conspiracy to induce U.S. youth to refuse to fight in Vietnam.

The American Humanist Association unanimously awarded Benjamin Spock the honorary title of Humanist of the Year for his tireless work against the war.

Such is Dr. Benjamin Spock, who, according to the world community, personifies the honor and conscience of America, and whose book we bring to the attention of the Soviet people.

Preface to the second edition (1971)

Advice to parents to observe the formation of the child's psyche is very important. The book touches upon problems, gives recommendations to parents of "difficult" children.

V. V. Kovanov Academician of the USSR Academy of Medical Sciences, Deputy Chairman of the Soviet Peace Committee, Professor

About parents

trust yourself

1. You know a lot more than you think.

About parents

trust yourself

1. You know a lot more than you think.

Parents are people too

2. Parents have their own needs.

3. Children are "easy" and "difficult".

It is known that children are born with different temperaments and it does not depend on your desires. You have to accept the child for who he is. But parents also have their own established characters, which are no longer easy to change. Some parents prefer quiet, obedient children and will have a hard time with an energetic and noisy child. Others easily cope with a restless boy and a fighter and will be disappointed if their child grows up "quiet". Parents try to adapt to their child and do everything in their power for him.

4. At best, hard work and the rejection of many pleasures await you.

There is a lot of work to take care of a child: you need to cook food for him, wash diapers and clothes, constantly clean up after him, separate fighters and console the beaten, listen to endless obscure stories, participate in children's games and read books to children that are completely uninteresting to you, make tedious walks around the zoo, take children to school and to children's morning parties, help them prepare lessons, go to parent-teacher meetings in the evenings when you are very tired.

You will spend a large part of the family budget on children, because of children you will not be able to go to the theater, cinema, lectures, visits and evenings often. You, of course, would not change places with childless parents for anything in the world, but still you lack your former freedom. Of course, people become parents not because they want to be martyrs, but because they love children and see them as flesh of their own flesh. They also love children because their parents also loved them as children. Taking care of children and watching their development give many parents, despite hard work, the greatest satisfaction in life, especially if the child turns out to be a wonderful person as a result. Children are our creations, the guarantee of our immortality. All other achievements in our life cannot be compared with the happiness of seeing how worthy people grow out of our children.

5. Don't need too many sacrifices.

Some young parents believe that they should completely give up their freedom and all pleasures simply on principle and not on practical grounds. Even sneaking out of the house when the opportunity presents itself to get some pleasure, they feel too guilty. Such feelings, but to a lesser extent, are natural for all parents in the first weeks after the birth of a child: everything is so new and you can't think of anything else. But too much self-sacrifice will not benefit you or the child. If parents are completely occupied only with their child, constantly worrying only about him, they become uninteresting for others and even for each other. They complain that they are confined within four walls because of the child, although they themselves are to blame for this. They involuntarily feel some dislike for their child, although he did not demand so many sacrifices. As a result, such parents expect too much from the child in gratitude for their labors. We must try not to go to extremes. You must honestly fulfill your parental duties, but also not deprive yourself of such pleasures as will not harm your child. Then you will be able to love your child more and show your love for him with greater pleasure.