How many godparents can you. The rules of the sacrament of baptism: how many times can you be a godmother or godfather for a child

Baptism in Orthodoxy is a special sacrament. It is also called spiritual birth. During the ceremony, the newborn receives a guardian angel as the protector of his soul, who will protect him throughout his life. According to church traditions, it is recommended to baptize a newborn on the eighth day of his life or on the fortieth. A special role in this ceremony is assigned to the godparents. They have a very serious task. They will have to spiritually educate their godson, introduce him to the Church and the Orthodox faith. Therefore, church ministers recommend taking the choice of spiritual successors very seriously.

According to the laws of the Russian Orthodox Church, godparents cannot be:

The godparent and godmother of the newborn must not be married;

Biological parents cannot baptize their child;

People belonging to other religious concessions cannot become spiritual recipients of the Orthodox;

A pregnant woman and a woman who is menstruating at the time of baptism;

Crazy, immoral and unbelieving people;

Strangers or unfamiliar people who agreed to this only because they were persuaded by the parents of the newborn;

Minor children.

In any of the above cases, the clergyman has the right to refuse to conduct the sacrament of baptism. Of course, you can lie. But after all, the future of the child will depend on this decision.

Who can be godmother and godfather?

As a rule, both a woman and a man become godparents at the same time. But if the child has only one godparent, then the church recommends choosing a godfather by gender. That is, a woman should baptize a girl, and a man should baptize a boy. This is not a strict requirement. Situations are allowed when a man becomes a spiritual recipient for a girl, and a woman for a boy. Before performing the sacrament of baptism, the clergyman will talk with the selected candidates. It is important that godparents are truly believing Orthodox people. So that you can completely rely on them in the duties of the spiritual upbringing of the child.

Receivers must come to the sacrament of baptism with pectoral crosses. The godmother should be with a covered head, with covered shoulders and in a dress no lower than the knees. There are no strict requirements for a godfather. But it is better to refuse T-shirts with shorts. There should not be any headgear on the head of a man. It is strictly forbidden to come to the rite of baptism in alcoholic or drug intoxication.

How many times can you be godparents?

When asked how many times one can be a godmother or father, the church does not give a definite answer. There are no strict restrictions. The godparents decide on their own whether to become a spiritual successor again or not. When making such a decision, you need to remember that the godparent takes on a very serious responsibility. After all, he will have to not only introduce the child to the Orthodox faith, but also take care of him throughout his life.

The baptism of a child is one of the most important and bright events in the life of both the baby and his parents. It is unacceptable to treat this ceremony lightly, since christening is an unusual holiday. On this day, the child acquires not only the named parents, but also a guardian angel who will be with him all his life.

It is not surprising that many seek to baptize their child immediately after birth. But it is impossible to hurry in such a matter, it is necessary to carefully prepare for every moment of the christening, thinking over and realizing all the little things. Many people are interested in the question - is it possible to be godfather to several children. There are discussions about this, but it is better to look for an answer from the ministers of the church themselves.

Young parents most often call their close friends for the role of godparents. But sometimes it happens that potential godparents of mom or dad already have several godchildren. How to be in this situation?

On the one hand, traditions say that it is impossible to refuse to be baptized, since you can invite trouble on yourself. On the other hand, would it be right to agree to take responsibility for one more person?

After all, baptism is not just a church ceremony, after which you can go to a banquet, forgetting about your main duties. To make the right decision, you need to carefully prepare and study the instructions of the spiritual fathers, who give valuable advice.

There is a superstition that one cannot become a godfather twice, since during the second ceremony the cross is removed from the first godson. This is nothing more than human opinion, which should not be relied upon when making a decision.

The clergy assure: nothing can cancel a properly conducted sacrament. Whether or not to agree to become a godfather for the second or third time is a personal matter for everyone. But in this case, you need to remember the responsibility before God, which the recipients take on. To have a godson means to have one more child, who always needs help in everything.

Spiritual parents should participate in the life of the baby not only materially, but also spiritually. Therefore, when choosing godparents, biological parents should be guided by the spiritual education of their friends and acquaintances.

When asked if it is possible to be godfather to several children, the church unequivocally answers yes. Therefore, if you have a desire to have another godson and participate in his spiritual upbringing, feel free to agree. But remember: you agreed to this role - you will have to make efforts to educate the child, and not just invite him to visit and give him gifts once a year.

Who should not be called godparents?

The choice of godparents is a responsible task. Often young mom and dad are not familiar with
church laws and invite people to baptize their child who, according to the laws of the church, should not do this.

That is why before the christening it is necessary to communicate with the priest and consult on a number of issues.

Who cannot baptize a child?

• • Gentiles. People who profess a different faith simply cannot be responsible for raising a baby according to Orthodox laws.
  • Young couples or spouses. People who are in a church or civil marriage.
  • The parents themselves. Biological mom and dad cannot baptize a son or daughter, since they are already assigned a special meaning in his life.
  • Atheists. The very idea that an unbelieving person can become a godfather is ridiculous and absurd. After all, the primary task of the godfather is the spiritual education of the child, its introduction into the Christian world and familiarization with God's laws.
  • Strangers, strangers. Rarely, but still, there are situations when the parents of the baby, due to some circumstances, cannot find potential godparents among their acquaintances. In this case, complete strangers are asked to hold the baby in their arms during the christening. Such a phenomenon is highly undesirable and is not approved by the church, although it does not fall under a direct ban.

Questions before christening

Questions such as how many times you can be a godmother and how many godchildren a godparent can have are absolutely normal for a person who is preparing to take on such responsibility.

It's important to know! What is it for and what is it: the rules of the sacrament

Every sane person who has been offered such a role thinks about what he will have to do after the christening, what is his participation in the life of the godson in the future and how to behave in church? Excitement before a responsible event is a common phenomenon. There is no need to worry that you will do something wrong, because next to you there will always be a spiritual mentor who will tell you how to behave and in what sequence to perform the required actions.

Frequent questions asked by young parents before christening to a church minister:

• Can a minor be a godfather?
• Is it possible to be the godfather of several children?
• Can a pregnant girl be baptized?
• What is the best age to baptize a baby?
• How many godparents should there be and how many times can one person become a godparent?

It is believed that a person who has not reached the age of majority cannot baptize a baby, since he does not realize all his responsibility in this process. It is definitely possible to baptize several children. But you should agree to this only if a person is sure that he will have enough time and energy to make a significant contribution to the upbringing of each godson.

Most often, young parents spend christening on the eighth day after birth. It is believed that the sooner a guardian angel is assigned to a new person, the better. But such an opportunity is not always available, because the church is not against christening at a later age. In some cases, the rite of baptism is carried out when a teenager is already entering a conscious age.

From the moment of christening, the baby has an invisible protector who will always protect him from all troubles. Often the name of an angel is directly related to the name of a person, since in the church they name a new servant of God in honor of a saint who patronizes a birthday or christening day.

According to church canons, each person can even have one godmother (godmother or father). It is not necessary to invite a couple to the christening. But if the parents have a desire to intermarry with a large number of people, then you can arrange the sacrament of baptism with the involvement of even two or three couples.

Important! Having several godparents is not forbidden by the church, but before the sacrament, everyone who decides to become a godfather should listen to a brief parting word from the priest regarding further participation in the life of the godson.

Useful video: Rules for baptizing a child

Conclusion

Each person can become a godfather an unlimited number of times. The main thing in this matter is to remember that at God's Judgment everyone will have to be responsible for the upbringing of their godchildren in the same way as for the upbringing of their own children.

Faith is a kind of science, the canons of which can only be understood through deep study. Especially many dilemmas arise during the rite of the sacrament of baptism. A lot of controversial issues cause prejudice. One of them: how many times can you be a godmother?

A mixture of statements

More than a thousand years have passed since Christianity spread to our lands. Along with the new religion, traditions and rituals unique to the area arose. Part of the reason for the appearance of extraordinary rites was the previous pagan faith. Time and mentality left no less imprint on Orthodoxy. Church rituals have become overgrown with many prejudices and gossip. Among them is the sacrament of baptism.

Therefore, now modern people know little about the laws of the Almighty, and believers have many questions. In particular, how many times can you be godmother or father?

Religion does not give a definite answer. But the priests say that only the person himself can solve this problem directly. Together with the title of second parents, godfathers take on significant responsibilities, failure to fulfill which is considered a grave sin.

The Mystery of Baptism

Before taking responsibility for a new, someone else's child, a person should find out what exactly is hidden behind this rite, and what role godfathers play in it. Having dealt with this issue, every woman herself will understand how many times it is possible to be a godmother to her.

The main thing to understand is that the ritual provides for the introduction of the child to church life. Along with this, all the sins of his parents and relatives, which were transmitted with blood, are removed from the baby. This ceremony is a new, religious birth of a boy or girl. With the sacrament, the child joins God. Now not only parents are responsible for his fate, but also the Lord, who will protect the baby from evil and trouble.

From the day of the ceremony, mom and dad must raise their child in the Orthodox faith. Godfathers help them in this task. If you are a believer and are ready to take on this responsibility, then the answer to the question of how many times you can be a godmother is unequivocal - as soon as they ask.

Mission of parents

It is an honor to be godfathers. Such a title means that of all the acquaintances, the newly-made parents consider you worthy of their child. They trust the fate of their child. For this, you must justify their hopes.

As a true Orthodox person, the godmother will introduce her new child to God. This includes going to the temple, studying prayers, and living according to the laws of the Lord. People who believe that the main task of godfathers is to be friends with the parents of an adopted child are deeply mistaken. You can't buy a birthday present. How many times can you become a godmother to a woman who does not care about the Orthodox upbringing of her children? The correct answer is never.

A person who is not able to pay due attention to the godson should not take on additional duties. Being a mom is a difficult mission. If the parents could not or did not want to involve the child in the church, their child grew up as an unkind person, then this sin will also be on your soul.

Refusal is not a crime

A person who understands responsibility can safely refuse such duties. The reason for disagreement should be explained in detail to the parents. If you are not able to bring such information to the consciousness of your acquaintances on your own, then the priest will help. The priest will explain in detail how many times you can become a godmother and why. Refusing to be a godfather is not a sin. But taking a child at the sacrament, whom you will not be able to guide on the right path in the future, is a heavy guilt.

It should be noted that, apart from this, there are no other serious reasons for refusing to baptize an infant. The only exceptions are people who were brought up in a different faith. After all, the main task of a mother or father is to help the child become a true Orthodox Christian.

Inquiry Office

In any situation where it is difficult to find a solution on your own, you should ask the priest for advice. This applies not only to the material side of the ceremony, but also to how many times you can be a godmother, is it possible to marry a godfather ...

A person who is poorly versed in Holy Scripture, and instead believes in gossip and prejudice, cannot soberly and correctly assess the situation. In addition, a person who does not understand the laws of the church should not independently draw conclusions based on the opinion of a neighbor or work colleague. These people can also confuse speculation with the truth.

The priest, on the contrary, will be able to answer the questions of interest in an accessible and correct way. His task is not just to briefly mint, but to explain to the person why in this situation it is worth doing in this way.

Before answering you how many times you can be a godmother, the priest will definitely ask if you are a believer, ask about your relationship with children for whom you have already become a church mother.

Religion and people

The main disputes arise because of gossip. So, for example, you can often hear that a woman should be the first to baptize a boy. For this dilemma, the church gives a clear definition: it does not matter who you stand behind. Gender doesn't matter at all. But there is another concept, deeper and little known.

The main responsibility for the child is borne by only one person who is in the first pair (moreover, of the same sex as the child). That is, the godfather will report in the next world for the boy, and the woman for the girl. If you don’t have “real” godchildren yet, then the answer to the question of how many times you can be a godmother comes up on its own - how life will turn out. The tradition to match one gender with the other, the opposite, is not church, but folk. Moreover, one person can baptize a child.

Priests and nuns

If you have abandoned the title of kuma, and there is no one else to take to your acquaintances, then sad parents should be explained that they can baptize a child without strangers. Of course, the church does not recommend such an action, because in case of accidents, when a child is left an orphan, it falls under the guardianship of godparents.

Persons who took part in the sacrament must take the child into their own family and bring them up as if they were their own. Such information is another reason to think about how many times you can be a godmother, and whether you are ready for such a step.

The priest who will conduct the ritual can also become the father of the baby. He, like no one else, will introduce the child to the church. With his help, the child will grow up with faith.

Another myth that often circulates among the people is that a pregnant woman does not have the right to be a mother to someone else's child. In fact, anyone can become a godfather. The main criterion is awareness of responsibility.

How many times can you be godmother to an unmarried girl? As you wish. Even nuns become mothers to babies they know. They will also take great care of the spirituality of the children.

Parenting Details

Contrary to speculation, it should be noted that godfathers can take a church marriage without barriers. After all, they are not blood relatives. But in the future they should not be in the same pair.

How many times can you be a godmother in one family? As you wish. But if they ask, then you perform your duties perfectly.

The main task of godparents is to be a true friend, adviser, teacher to the child. If a child is sick, you need to pray for his health and involve your entire family in the ceremony. It is also worth asking the Lord for the house of an adopted son or daughter. It is necessary to attend services with the baby and take communion, tell him about the life of the saints and help him live with faith in his heart, and subsequently take care of his children.

Each of the godchildren needs to pay attention not only to the holidays. An individual child requires certain words, his own approach. If you can help your son or daughter, then God will surely thank you. He will send happiness and good luck.

What is Baptism? Why is it called a Sacrament? You will find comprehensive answers to all these questions in this article prepared by the editors of Pravmir.

The Sacrament of Baptism: Answers to Readers' Questions

Today I would like to tell the reader about the sacrament of Baptism and the godparents.

For ease of perception, I will offer the reader an article in the form of questions most often asked by people about Baptism and the answers to them. So the first question is:

What is Baptism? Why is it called a Sacrament?

Baptism is one of the seven sacraments of the Orthodox Church, in which the believer, when the body is immersed three times in water with the invocation of the name of the Most Holy Trinity - the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, dies to a sinful life, and is reborn by the Holy Spirit for Eternal Life. Of course, there is a basis for this action in the Holy Scriptures: "He who is not born of water and the Spirit cannot enter the Kingdom of God" (John 3:5). Christ says in the Gospel: “Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved; but whoever does not believe will be condemned” (Mark 16:16).

So, baptism is necessary for a person to be saved. Baptism is a new birth for spiritual life, in which a person can reach the Kingdom of Heaven. And it is called a sacrament because through it, in a mysterious, incomprehensible way for us, the invisible saving power of God, grace, acts on the person being baptized. Like other sacraments, baptism is established by God. The Lord Jesus Christ himself, sending the apostles to preach the gospel, taught them to baptize people: “Go, make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit” (Matthew 28:19). Having been baptized, a person becomes a member of the Church of Christ and from now on can proceed to the rest of the sacraments of the Church.

Now that the reader has become acquainted with the Orthodox concept of baptism, it is appropriate to consider one of the most frequently asked questions related to the baptism of children. So:

Baptism of infants: is it possible to baptize infants, because they do not have an independent faith?

Quite right, young children do not have independent, conscious faith. But don't the parents who brought their child to be baptized in the temple of God have it? Will they not instill faith in God in their child from childhood? It is obvious that parents have such a faith, and most likely will instill it in their child. In addition, the child will also have godparents - godparents from the baptismal font, who vouch for him and undertake to raise their godchild in the Orthodox faith. Thus, infants are baptized not according to their own faith, but according to the faith of their parents and godparents who brought the child to baptism.

The New Testament baptism was typified by the Old Testament circumcision. In the Old Testament, babies were brought to the temple for circumcision on the eighth day. By this, the child's parents showed their and his faith and belonging to God's chosen people. Christians can say the same about baptism in the words of John Chrysostom: "Baptism is the most obvious difference and separation of the faithful from the unbelievers." Moreover, there is a basis for this in the Holy Scriptures: “They were circumcised with the circumcision made without hands, by putting off the sinful body of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ; being buried with Him in baptism” (Col. 2:11-12). That is, baptism is a dying and burial for sin and a resurrection for a perfect life with Christ.

These reasons are enough to make the reader realize the importance of infant baptism. After that, the next question would be:

When should children be baptized?

There are no specific rules in this matter. But usually children are baptized on the 40th day after birth, although this can be done earlier or later. The main thing is not to postpone baptism for a long time unless absolutely necessary. It would be wrong to deprive a child of such a great sacrament for the sake of the circumstances.

An inquisitive reader may have questions regarding the days of baptism. For example, on the eve of multi-day fasts, the question most often heard is:

Is it possible to baptize children on fasting days?

Yes, you certainly may! But technically it doesn't always work. In some churches, during the days of Great Lent, they baptize only on Saturdays and Sundays. This practice is most likely based on the fact that weekday Lenten services are very long, and the gaps between morning and evening services can be short. On Saturdays and Sundays, divine services are somewhat shorter in time, and priests can devote more time to the requirements. Therefore, when planning the day of baptism, it is better to find out in advance about the rules observed in the temple where the child will be baptized. Well, if we talk about the days on which you can baptize, then there are no restrictions on this issue. You can baptize children on any day when there are no technical obstacles to this.

I have already mentioned that every person, if possible, should have godparents - godparents from the baptismal font. Moreover, they should be in children who are baptized according to the faith of their parents and godparents. The question arises:

How many godparents should a child have?

Church rules prescribe to have a godparent for the child of the same sex as the person being baptized. That is, for a boy - a man, and for a girl - a woman. In tradition, both godparents are usually chosen for the child: father and mother. This does not contradict the canons in any way. It will also not be a contradiction if, if necessary, the child has a godfather of a different sex than the baptized person himself. The main thing is that it should be a truly believing person who would subsequently conscientiously fulfill his duties of raising a child in the Orthodox faith. Thus, a baptized person can have one or, at most, two godparents.

Having dealt with the number of godparents, the reader will most likely want to know:

What are the requirements for godparents?

The first and main requirement is the undoubted Orthodox faith of the recipients. Godparents must be church-going people, living the church life. After all, they will have to teach their godson or goddaughter the basics of the Orthodox faith, to give spiritual instructions. If they themselves are ignorant of these matters, what will they be able to teach the child? Godparents are entrusted with a huge responsibility for the spiritual upbringing of their godchildren, for they, together with their parents, are responsible for it before God. This responsibility begins with the renunciation of "Satan, and all his works, and all his angels, and all his ministry, and all his pride." Thus, the godparents, answering for their godson, make a promise that their godchild will be a Christian.

If the godson is already an adult and pronounces the words of renunciation himself, then the godparents present at the same time become guarantors before the Church in the fidelity of his words. Godparents are obliged to teach their godchildren to resort to the saving Sacraments of the Church, mainly confession and communion, they must give them knowledge about the meaning of worship, the features of the church calendar, and the grace-filled power of miraculous icons and other shrines. The godparents must accustom those taken from the font to attend church services, fast, pray, and observe other provisions of the church charter. But the main thing is that godparents should always pray for their godson. Obviously, strangers cannot be godparents, for example, some kind-hearted grandmother from the temple, whom her parents persuaded to “hold” the baby at baptism.

But also, you should not take as godparents just close people or relatives who do not meet the spiritual requirements that were outlined above.

Godparents should not become an object of personal gain for the parents of the baptized. The desire to intermarry with a profitable person, for example, with a boss, often guides parents when choosing godparents for a child. At the same time, forgetting about the true purpose of baptism, parents can deprive the child of a real godfather, and impose on him one who subsequently will not care at all about the spiritual upbringing of the child, for which he himself will also answer to God. Unrepentant sinners and people leading an immoral lifestyle cannot become godparents.

Some of the details of baptism include the following question:

Is it possible for a woman to become a godmother on the days of the monthly cleansing? What to do if it did happen?

On such days, women should refrain from participating in church sacraments, which include baptism. But if this did happen, then it is necessary to repent at confession.

Perhaps someone reading this article will become a godfather in the near future. Realizing the importance of the decision being made, they will be interested in:

How do future godparents prepare for baptism?

There are no special rules for preparing recipients for baptism. At some churches, special talks are held, the purpose of which is usually to explain to a person all the provisions of the Orthodox faith regarding baptism and acceptance. If there is an opportunity to attend such conversations, then it is necessary to do this, because. this is very helpful for future godparents. If the future godparents are sufficiently churched, constantly confess and take communion, then attending such conversations will be a completely sufficient measure of preparation for them.

If potential recipients themselves are not yet sufficiently churched, then a good preparation for them will be not only acquiring the necessary knowledge about church life, but also studying the Holy Scriptures, the basic rules of Christian piety, as well as a three-day fast, confession and communion before the sacrament of baptism. There are several other traditions regarding recipients. Usually the godfather takes care of the payment (if any) for the baptism itself and the purchase of a pectoral cross for his godson. The godmother buys a baptismal cross for the girl, and also brings the things necessary for baptism. Typically, a christening kit includes a baptismal shirt, a sheet and a towel.

But these traditions are not binding. Often, different regions and even individual churches have their own traditions, the implementation of which is strictly monitored by parishioners and even priests, although they do not have any dogmatic and canonical foundations. Therefore, it is better to learn more about them in the temple in which baptism will take place.

Sometimes one hears a purely technical question related to baptism:

What should godparents give for baptism (godson, godson's parents, priest)?

This question does not lie in the spiritual realm, regulated by canonical rules and traditions. But, it seems that the gift should be useful and remind of the day of baptism. Useful gifts on the day of baptism could be icons, the Gospel, spiritual literature, prayer books, etc. In general, in church shops you can now find a lot of interesting and soulful things, so acquiring a worthy gift should not be a big difficulty.

A fairly common question asked by unchurched parents is the question:

Can non-Orthodox Christians or Gentiles become godparents?

It is quite obvious that they are not, because they will not be able to teach their godson the truths of the Orthodox faith. Not being members of the Orthodox Church, they cannot take part in church sacraments at all.

Unfortunately, many parents do not ask about this in advance and, without any remorse, invite non-Orthodox and Gentile godparents to their children. At baptism, of course, no one talks about this. But then, having learned about the inadmissibility of the deed, the parents run to the temple, asking:

What should I do if this happened by mistake? Is baptism valid in this case? Should a child be baptized?

First of all, such situations show the extreme irresponsibility of parents when choosing godparents for their child. Nevertheless, such cases are not uncommon, and they occur among unchurched people who do not live a church life. An unequivocal answer to the question "what to do in this case?" it is impossible to give, because there is nothing of the kind in the church canons. This is not surprising, since canons and rules are written for members of the Orthodox Church, which cannot be said about heterodox and non-believers. Nevertheless, as a fact, baptism took place, and it cannot be called invalid. It is legal and valid, and the baptized one has become a full-fledged Orthodox Christian, because. was baptized by an Orthodox priest in the name of the Holy Trinity. No rebaptism is required; there is no such concept at all in the Orthodox Church. A person is born once physically, he cannot repeat it again. Similarly, only once a person can be born for spiritual life, so there can be only one baptism.

I will allow myself a small digression and tell the reader how once I had to witness one not very pleasant scene. A young married couple brought their newborn son to the temple for baptism. The couple worked in a foreign company and invited one of their colleagues, a foreigner, a Lutheran, to become godfather. True, a girl of the Orthodox faith was supposed to become a godmother. Neither parents nor future godparents were distinguished by special knowledge in the field of Orthodox dogma. The news of the impossibility of having a Lutheran as godfather of their son was received with hostility by the child's parents. They were asked to find another godfather or to baptize the child with one godmother. But this proposal angered the father and mother even more. The stubborn desire to see this particular person as a godparent prevailed over the common sense of the parents, and the priest had to refuse to baptize the child. So the illiteracy of the parents became an obstacle to the baptism of their child.

Thank God that such situations no longer occurred in my priestly practice. The curious reader may well assume that there may be some obstacles to receiving the sacrament of baptism. And he will be absolutely right. So:

In what case can a priest refuse a person to be baptized?

Orthodox believe in God the Trinity - Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The founder of the Christian faith was the Son - the Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, a person who does not accept the divinity of Christ and does not believe in the Holy Trinity cannot be an Orthodox Christian. Also, a person who denies the truths of the Orthodox faith cannot become an Orthodox Christian. The priest has the right to refuse baptism to a person if he is going to accept the sacrament as some kind of magical rite or has some pagan belief regarding baptism itself. But this is a separate issue and I will touch on it later.

A very common question about receivers is the question:

Can spouses or those who are about to get married become godparents?

Yes they can. Contrary to popular belief, there is no canonical prohibition for spouses or those about to get married to be godparents to one child. There is only a canonical rule that prohibits the godfather from marrying the child's mother. The spiritual relationship established between them through the sacrament of baptism is higher than any other union, even marriage. But this rule does not affect the possibility of marriage of godparents or the possibility of spouses to become godparents.

Sometimes unchurched parents of children, wanting to choose godparents for their children, ask the following question:

Can people living in a civil marriage become godparents?

At first glance, this is a rather complicated issue, but from the ecclesiastical point of view, it is resolved unambiguously. Such a family cannot be called complete. And in general it is impossible to call prodigal cohabitation a family. After all, in fact, people living in the so-called civil marriage live in fornication. This is a big problem in modern society. People baptized in the Orthodox Church, at least conscious of themselves as Christians, for some incomprehensible reasons, refuse to legitimize their union not only before God (which is undoubtedly more important), but also before the state. There are countless answers to be heard. But, unfortunately, these people simply do not want to understand that they are looking for any excuses for themselves.

For God, the desire to “get to know each other better” or “unwillingness to stain the passport with unnecessary stamps” cannot be an excuse for fornication. In fact, people living in a “civil” marriage trample on all Christian concepts about marriage and family. Christian marriage implies the responsibility of spouses for each other. During the marriage, they become one, and not two different people who made a promise to live under the same roof from now on. Marriage can be compared to two legs of one body. If one leg stumbles or breaks, won't the other leg bear the full weight of the body? And in a "civil" marriage, people do not even want to take responsibility for putting a stamp in their passport.

What then can be said about such irresponsible people, who at the same time want to be godparents? What good can they teach a child? Can they, having very shaky moral foundations, be able to set a good example for their godson? Not at all. Also, according to church canons, people leading an immoral life (“civil” marriage should be regarded in this way) cannot be recipients from the baptismal font. And if these people finally decide to legitimize their relationship before God and the state, then they, moreover, will not be able to be godparents to one child. Despite the apparent complexity of the question, there can be only one answer to it - unambiguously: no.

The topic of gender relations is always very acute in all areas of human life. It goes without saying that this translates into various issues that are directly related to baptism. Here is one of them:

Can a young man (or girl) become a godfather for his bride (groom)?

In this case, they will have to terminate their relationship and limit themselves to only a spiritual connection, because. in the sacrament of baptism, one of them will become the godparent of the other. Can a son marry his own mother? Or a daughter to marry her own father? It is quite obvious that it is not. Of course, church canons cannot allow such a thing to happen.

Much more often than others there are questions about the possible perception of close relatives. So:

Can relatives become godparents?

Grandfathers, grandmothers, uncles and aunts may well become godparents to their little relatives. There is no contradiction to this in church canons.

Can an adoptive father (mother) become a godfather to an adopted child?

According to Canon 53 of the VI Ecumenical Council, this is unacceptable.

Based on the fact that spiritual kinship is established between godparents and parents, an inquisitive reader may ask the following question:

Can the parents of a child become godparents of their godfathers (their godchildren)?

Yes, this is perfectly acceptable. Such an action in no way violates the spiritual kinship established between parents and recipients, but only strengthens it. One of the parents, for example, the mother of the child can become the godmother of the daughter of one of the godfathers. And the father may well be the godfather of the son of another godfather or godfather. There are other options, but, in any case, the spouses cannot become the recipients of one child.

Sometimes people ask this question:

Can a priest be a godfather (including one who performs the sacrament of baptism)?

Yes maybe. In general, this question is very urgent. From time to time I have to hear a request to become a godfather from people completely unfamiliar to me. Parents bring their child to be baptized. For some reason, there was no godfather for the child. They begin to ask to become a godfather to the child, motivating this request by the fact that they heard from someone that in the absence of a godfather, the priest must fulfill this role. You have to refuse and baptize with one godmother. A priest is the same person as everyone else, and he may well refuse strangers to be godparents to their child. After all, he will have to bear the responsibility for raising his godchild. But how can he do this if he sees this child for the first time and is completely unfamiliar with his parents? And will most likely never see it again. Obviously this is not possible. But a priest (even if he himself will perform the sacrament of baptism) or, for example, a deacon (and the one who will concelebrate with the priest for the sacrament of baptism) may well become godparents for the children of their friends, acquaintances or parishioners. There are no canonical barriers to this.

Continuing the theme of acceptance, one cannot help but recall such a phenomenon as the desire of parents due to some, sometimes completely incomprehensible, reasons to “take a godfather in absentia”.

Is it possible to take a godfather "in absentia"?

The very meaning of reception presupposes the acceptance by the godfather of his godson from the font itself. By his presence, the godfather agrees to be the recipient of the baptized and undertakes to educate him in the Orthodox faith. This cannot be done in absentia. In the end, the person whom they are trying to “record in absentia” as godparents may not agree to this action at all, and, as a result, the person being baptized may be left without a godfather at all.

Sometimes from parishioners you have to hear questions about the following:

How many times can a person become a godfather?

In the Orthodox Church there is no clear canonical definition as to how many times a person can become a godfather during a lifetime. The main thing that a person who agrees to become a recipient should remember is a great responsibility for which he will have to answer before God. The measure of this responsibility determines how many times a person will be able to take on the reception. For each person, this measure is different and, sooner or later, a person may have to give up a new perception.

Is it possible to refuse to become a godfather? Wouldn't that be a sin?

If a person feels an inner unpreparedness or has fundamental fears that he will not be able to conscientiously fulfill the duties of a godparent, then he may well refuse the child’s parents (or the baptized person himself, if it is an adult) to become their child’s godfather. There is no sin in this. It will be more honest in relation to the child, his parents and himself than, having taken responsibility for the spiritual upbringing of the child, not fulfilling his immediate duties.

Continuing this topic, here are a few more questions that people usually ask about the number of possible godchildren.

Can I become a godfather to the second child in the family, if I already had one with the first?

Yes, you can. There are no canonical barriers to this.

Is it possible for one person during baptism to be the recipient of several people (for example, twins)?

There are no canonical restrictions on this. But technically it can be quite difficult if babies are being baptized. The recipient will have to hold and receive both babies from the font at the same time. It would be better if each godson had his own godparents. After all, each of those baptized individually are different people who have the right to their godfather.

Probably, many will be interested in the following question:

At what age can you become a foster child?

Underage children cannot become godparents. But, even if a person has not yet reached the age of majority, then his age should be such that he can realize the full burden of the responsibility taken upon himself, and will conscientiously fulfill his duties as a godfather. It seems that this may be the age close to adulthood.

The relationship between the child's parents and godparents also plays an important role in the upbringing of children. It is good when parents and godparents have spiritual unity and direct all their efforts towards the proper spiritual upbringing of their child. But human relationships are not always cloudless, and sometimes one has to hear such a question:

What to do if you quarreled with the parents of your godson and for this reason you cannot see him?

The answer suggests itself: to make peace with the parents of the godson. For what can a child be taught by people who have a spiritual relationship and at the same time are at enmity with each other? It is worth thinking not about personal ambitions, but about raising a child and, having gained patience and humility, try to establish relations with the godson's parents. The same can be said for the parents of the child.

But a quarrel is not always the reason that the godfather cannot see the godson for a long time.

What to do if, due to objective reasons, you do not see your godson for years?

I think that the objective reasons are the physical separation of the godfather from the godson. This is possible if the parents moved with the child to another city, country. In this case, it remains only to pray for the godson and, if possible, communicate with him using all available means of communication.

Unfortunately, some godparents, having christened the baby, completely forget about their immediate duties. Sometimes the reason for this is not only the elementary ignorance of the recipient about his duties, but his falling into grave sins that make their own spiritual life very difficult. Then the parents of the child involuntarily raise a completely legitimate question:

Is it possible to refuse godparents who do not fulfill their duties, who have fallen into serious sins or lead an immoral lifestyle?

The Orthodox Church does not know the order of refusal of godparents. But parents can find an adult who, not being the actual recipient from the font, would help in the spiritual upbringing of the child. At the same time, one cannot consider him a godfather.

But having such an assistant is better than depriving the child of communication with a spiritual mentor and friend altogether. After all, a moment may come when the child begins to seek spiritual authority not only in the family, but also outside it. And at this moment such an assistant would be very helpful. And a child, as they grow older, can be taught to pray for the godfather. After all, the spiritual connection of a child with the person who took him from the font will not be broken if he takes responsibility for a person who himself has not coped with this responsibility. It happens that children surpass their parents and mentors in prayer and piety.

Prayer for a sinner or a stray will be a manifestation of love for this person. After all, it is not for nothing that the Apostle James says in his epistle to Christians: “Pray for one another that you may be healed; the fervent prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much” (James 5:16). But all these actions must be coordinated with your confessor and receive a blessing on them.

And here is another interesting question that people periodically ask:

When is there no need for godparents?

There is always a need for godparents. Especially for children. But not every adult baptized can boast of a good knowledge of the Holy Scriptures and church canons. If necessary, an adult can be baptized without godparents, because. he has a conscious faith in God and can quite independently pronounce the words of renunciation of Satan, combine with Christ and read the Creed. He is fully accountable for his actions. The same cannot be said for babies and young children. The godparents do it all for them. But, in case of extreme need, you can baptize a child without godparents. Such a need, of course, can be the complete absence of worthy godparents.

Godless time has left its mark on the destinies of many people. The result of this was that some people, after long years of unbelief, finally gained faith in God, but when they came to the temple, they did not know whether they had been baptized in childhood by believing relatives. A logical question arises:

Is it necessary to baptize a person who does not know for sure whether he was baptized in childhood?

According to Canon 84 of the VI Ecumenical Council, such people must be baptized if there are no witnesses who could confirm or deny the fact of their baptism. In this case, a person is baptized, pronouncing the formula: “If not baptized, the servant (slave) of God is baptized ...”.

Something I'm all about children and about children. Among the readers, perhaps, there are also such people who have not yet been honored with the saving sacrament of baptism, but with all their hearts strive for it. So:

What does a person who is preparing to become an Orthodox Christian need to know? How can he prepare for the sacrament of baptism?

A person's knowledge of faith begins with the reading of the Holy Scriptures. Therefore, a person who wants to be baptized, first of all, needs to read the Gospel. After reading the Gospel, a person may have a number of questions that require a competent answer. Such answers can be obtained at the so-called catechumens, which are held in many temples. At such conversations, the fundamentals of the Orthodox faith are explained to those who wish to be baptized. If there are no such conversations at the temple in which the person is going to be baptized, then you can ask all the questions of interest to the priest in the temple. It will also be useful to read some books that explain Christian dogmas, such as the Law of God. It will be good if, before accepting the sacrament of baptism, a person memorizes the Creed, which briefly outlines the Orthodox dogma about God and the Church. This prayer will be read at baptism, and it would be great if the person being baptized himself confessed his faith. Direct preparation begins a few days before baptism. These days are special, so you should not scatter your attention on other, even very important, problems. It is worth devoting this time to spiritual and moral reflections, avoiding fuss, empty talk, participation in various entertainments. It must be remembered that baptism, like the other sacraments, is great and holy. It must be approached with the greatest awe and reverence. It is advisable to observe a fast for 2-3 days, living in marriage on the eve of the night to refrain from marital relations. You need to be extremely clean and tidy for baptism. You can wear new fancy clothes. Women should not wear make-up, as they always do when visiting a temple.

There are many superstitions associated with the sacrament of baptism, which I would also like to touch on in this article. One of the most common superstitions is:

Can a girl be the first to baptize a girl? They say that if a girl is baptized first, and not a boy, then the godmother will give her happiness ...

This statement is also a superstition that has no basis either in the Holy Scriptures or in church canons and traditions. And happiness, if it is deserved before God, will not go anywhere from a person.

Another odd thought I've heard over and over again:

Can a pregnant woman become a godmother? Would this affect her own child or godson in some way?

Yes, you certainly may. Such a delusion has nothing to do with church canons and traditions and is also superstition. Participation in church sacraments can only be to the benefit of the expectant mother. I also had to baptize pregnant women. Babies were born strong and healthy.

A lot of superstitions are associated with the so-called crossing. Moreover, the reasons for such a crazy action are sometimes indicated very bizarre and even funny. But most of these justifications are pagan and occult in origin. Here, for example, is one of the most common superstitions of occult origin:

Is it true that in order to remove the damage induced on a person, it is necessary to re-baptize, and keep the new name a secret so that new attempts at witchcraft do not work, because. conjure precisely in the name?

To be honest, hearing such statements, I want to laugh heartily. But, unfortunately, it's not funny. What kind of pagan denseness does an Orthodox person need to reach in order to decide that baptism is a kind of magical ritual, a kind of antidote for corruption. An antidote for some vague substance that no one even knows the definition of. What is this ghostly corruption? It is unlikely that anyone who is so afraid of her will be able to clearly answer this question. This is not surprising. Instead of looking for God in life and fulfilling His commandments, the "church" people with enviable zeal are looking for the mother of all evils in everything - damage. And where does it come from?

I will allow myself a small lyrical digression. A man is walking down the street, stumbled. All - jinxed! We urgently need to run to the temple to put a candle so that everything is fine and the evil eye passes. While walking to the temple, he stumbled again. Looks like they not only jinxed it, but also caused damage! Ooh, wicked! Well, nothing, now I will come to the temple, I will pray, I will buy candles, I will stick all the candlesticks, I will fight the corruption with all my might. The man ran to the temple, on the porch he again stumbled and fell. Everyone - lie down and die! Damage to death, a family curse, well, and there is some kind of disgusting thing there, I forgot the name, but also something very terrible. Cocktail "three in one"! Against this, candles and prayer will not help, this is a serious matter, an ancient voodoo spell! There is only one way out - to be baptized again, and only with a new name, so that when these very voodoo whispered their old name and stuck needles into dolls, all their spells flew by. They will not know the new name. And all witchcraft is done in the name, didn’t you know? What fun it will be when they whisper and conjure intensely there, and everything will fly by! Bang, bang and - by! Oh, it's good when there is baptism - a cure for all diseases!

This is how superstitions associated with re-baptism appear. But much more often, the sources of these superstitions are the figures of the occult sciences, i.e. fortunetellers, psychics, healers and other "gifted by God" personalities. These tireless "generators" of newfangled occult terminology use all sorts of tricks to seduce a person. Birth curses, and crowns of celibacy, and karmic knots of fate, translations, love spells with lapels and other occult nonsense are used. And all that needs to be done to get rid of all this is to cross yourself. And there was no damage. And laughter and sin! But many peck at these near-church tricks of "mothers Glafir" and "fathers Tikhonov", and run to the temple for re-baptism. It’s good if they tell them where they have such an ardent desire to cross themselves, and they will be denied this blasphemy, having previously explained what trips to the occultists are fraught with. And some do not even say that they have already been baptized and are baptized again. There are also those who are baptized several times, because. previous baptisms "didn't help". And they won't help! Greater blasphemy over the sacrament is difficult to imagine. After all, the Lord knows the heart of a person, knows about all his thoughts.

It is worth saying a few words about the name, which is so advised to change "good people." A person is given a name on the eighth day from birth, but since many do not know about this, basically a prayer for naming is read by a priest immediately before baptism. Surely everyone knows that the name is given to a person in honor of one of the saints. And it is this saint who is our patron and intercessor for us before God. And, of course, it seems that every Christian should call on his saint as often as possible and ask for his prayers before the throne of the Almighty. But what actually happens? Not only does a person neglect his name, but he also neglects his saint, in whose honor he is named. And instead of calling for help from his heavenly patron, his saint, at the moment of trouble or danger, he visits fortune-tellers and psychics. The “reward” for this will be appropriate.

There is another superstition related directly to the sacrament of baptism itself. Almost immediately after baptism, the rite of hair cutting follows. At the same time, the recipient is given a piece of wax, in which it is supposed to roll the cut hair. This wax receiver must throw into the water. This is where the fun begins. Not sure where the question comes from:

Is it true that if wax with cut hair sinks at baptism, then the life of the person being baptized will be short?

No, this is a superstition. According to the laws of physics, wax cannot sink in water at all. But if you throw it from a height with sufficient force, then at the first moment it will really go under water. Fortunately, if the superstitious godfather does not see this moment and "fortune telling on baptismal wax" will give a positive result. But, as soon as the godfather notices the moment the wax is immersed in water, lamentations immediately begin, and the newly-made Christian is almost buried alive. After that, it is sometimes difficult to get out of a state of terrible depression the parents of a child who are told about the “sign of God” seen at baptism. Of course, this superstition has no basis in church canons and traditions.

Summing up, I would like to note that baptism is a great sacrament, and the approach to it should be reverent and deliberate. It is sad to see people who have received the sacrament of baptism and continue to live their former sinful lives. Having been baptized, a person must remember that now he is an Orthodox Christian, a warrior of Christ, a member of the Church. It owes a lot. First of all, to love. Love for God and neighbor. So let each of us, regardless of when he was baptized, fulfill these commandments. Then we can hope that the Lord will lead us into the Kingdom of Heaven. That Kingdom, the path to which the sacrament of Baptism opens for us.

It is one of the main sacraments, which symbolizes the acceptance of a person into a Christian family. This is the spiritual birth of man. In baptism, a guardian angel is assigned to the child, who will be his assistant throughout his life. Most often, the rite of baptism is performed on a baby no older than one year. This is a crucial moment for parents - it is necessary to choose godparents (grandparents).

This candidacy is most often chosen by relatives or close friends. But there are situations when a candidate chosen for the role of a successor already has several godchildren. The question arises: is it possible to be the godfather of several children? Consider this and other nuances regarding the rite of baptism.

When should children be baptized

There are no specific rules in this matter, but there is an opinion that the sooner it is done, the better. The church calls for baptism after birth on the eighth day. Of course, you can baptize at any other time, the main thing is not to postpone this process for a long time without the need.

When planning the day of baptism, you must first learn about the rules that are observed in the temple chosen for the ceremony. Baptism can be performed on any day of the week, but more often it is done on Saturday or Sunday. The service these days is a little shorter, so the priest can devote more time to the requirements.

At baptism, the child receives a name. In Orthodox families, these names are given in honor of a particular saint. Since ancient times, it has been customary to choose the name of the saint whose memory falls on the day the baby is baptized. But this is not a requirement, but rather a custom.

The wishes of the parents in this regard are always taken into account. If parents have difficulties, the priest himself can choose a heavenly patron.

How many godparents should be

According to church rules: the child must have one godparent of the same sex as him. But traditionally choose two receivers: and godfather and father. This is not against the canons. Also, the presence of one successor of the opposite sex will not be a contradiction. It is important that this person was baptized and subsequently conscientiously treated his duties as a godparent.

The recipient is a person who will have to be a mentor for the rest of his life, introduce the godson to Orthodox traditions, and bear responsibility for his actions before God. Therefore, it is important to choose a person who can become an example for the godson.

Who can not be chosen as godparents

The choice of godparents must be taken seriously. You should not choose as receivers:

• a person who does not believe in God;
• Gentiles;
• spouses;
• strangers who have nothing to do with the child;
• the parents themselves.

As it was said, married spouses cannot be godparents. This is explained by the fact that relations between godfathers should be on a spiritual level.

How many times can you be a godparent

The Orthodox Church does not have a clear canonical definition of how many times one can be a godmother or father. The measure of this is only the opportunity not only to attend the ceremony and give gifts to the godson once a year, but also to help him in everything, teach him and introduce him to the church. It is believed that on the day of the last judgment, the godfather will be asked for the upbringing of the godson as well as for the upbringing of his own child.

There is an incorrect opinion that a woman cannot become a godmother two or more times, since in this case she removes the cross from the first child. But church employees refute this opinion, and to the question of whether it is possible to become a godmother to several children, they give a positive answer.

Another erroneous statement that it is impossible for a woman to baptize several times same-sex children. This is just as wrong as saying that you should first have a godson, and only then a goddaughter. So, as the baptized first girl will become an obstacle in marriage. All these conjectures from the detachment of human superstition. Is it possible to be godmother twice? The answer is unequivocal - you can. If you wish, you can become a godparent a second time.

Questions to Consider Before Baptism

How is the rite of baptism

An adult must have a conversation with a priest before baptism. A person must also remember all his grave sins and renounce them.

Before the beginning of the ceremony, the rite of announcement is performed and a prayer of prohibition to unclean spirits is said. The priest asks the question: "Are you united with Christ?" To which it is necessary to answer: "I combine." Next - read the Creed.

Then the sacrament of Baptism itself begins. During it, the child is immersed three times in consecrated water and puts on a white shirt, which is a symbol of a new life with Christ in the light. A pectoral cross is put on, which must be worn throughout life. The baptismal shirt is kept. After baptism, the newly baptized is anointed and the first communion takes place.