Aggressive human behavior causes. Aggression in men. Causes of aggression in children

In itself, it is unpleasant, and not only to others who are suddenly dipped into negativity, but also to the aggressors themselves. In fact, among the latter there are not so many clinical villains who enjoy splashing violent emotions on other people or objects. Normal people are also capable of such outbursts, but then they experience remorse, try to make amends for their guilt, and at least try to control themselves. Aggression is especially destructive in men, the reasons for this can be so far-fetched and strange that the existence of a problem becomes obvious to all participants in the situation.

Types and types of male aggression

It should be noted right away that negative emotions spilling out are not exclusively a male prerogative. Women are just as capable of being aggressors, they do not follow their actions and words. The paradox is that male aggression is partly considered socially acceptable. Of course, extreme manifestations are condemned, but there are many justifications for such a phenomenon as aggression in men. The reasons can be very diverse - from competition to health conditions.

Two main types of aggression, which are easily identified even by non-specialists:

• verbal, when the negative is expressed in a cry or frankly negative vocabulary;
• physical, when beatings, destruction, attempted murder take place.

With auto-aggression, the negative is directed at itself, manifesting itself as all kinds of destructive actions. The motto of this type of aggression is: "Let me be worse."

Psychologists classify what we are considering into several types according to the following criteria: method of manifestation, direction, causes, degree of expression. Self-diagnosis in this case is practically impossible, since in most cases the aggressor seeks self-justification, does not see and does not want to see the problem, and successfully shifts the blame onto others.

Verbal aggression

External manifestations of this type of aggression are quite expressive. It can be a furious cry, curses and curses. Often they are supplemented by gestural expression - a man can make insulting or threatening gestures, shake his fist, and swing. In the animal world, males actively use this type of aggression: who growls louder, then declares himself as the owner of the territory, it comes to outright fights much less often.

However, verbal aggression in men, the causes of which may lie both in mental health and in social pressure, is not so harmless. It destroys the psyche of those who are forced to live nearby. Children get used to the abnormal model of communication, absorb the pattern of paternal behavior as the norm.

physical aggression

An extreme form of aggressive behavior, when a person moves from screams and threats to active physical actions. Now it is not just a threatening swing of the fist, but a blow. A man is capable of causing serious injury to even the closest people, breaking or breaking personal belongings. Man behaves like Godzilla, and destruction becomes his main goal. It can be either a short explosion, literally for one blow, or a nightmare for many hours, which is why aggression in men is considered the most dangerous. The reasons are called very different - from "she provoked me" to "I'm a man, you can't make me angry."

Asking the question of how admissible this is, it is best to take the Criminal Code as a guide. It says in black and white that bodily harm of varying severity, attempted murder and intentional harm to personal property are all crimes.

Features of unmotivated male aggression

It is conditionally possible to divide manifestations of rage into motivated and unmotivated. One can understand and partially justify the aggression shown in the heat of passion. This is often referred to as "righteous anger". If someone offends the relatives of this man, encroaches on their life and health, then the aggressive response is at least understandable.

The problem is such attacks of aggression in men, the causes of which cannot be calculated at a glance. What got into him? I had just been a normal person, and suddenly they changed it! Witnesses of a sudden unmotivated rage that erupts in any form, verbal or physical, respond approximately like this. In fact, any act has a reason, explanation or motive, but they are not always on the surface.

Reasons or excuses?

Where is the line between reasons and excuses? As an example, we can cite such a phenomenon as the aggression of a man towards a woman. The reasons are often the most common attempts to justify themselves, to shift the blame to the victim: “Why was she late after work? She must be cheating, she needs to be shown a place!” aggression".

Behind such behavior can be both personal hatred for a certain person, and banal misogyny. If a man seriously considers women second-class people, then is it worth being surprised at the vicious attacks against them?

However, outbreaks of aggression can take place not because a man is just an evil type. In addition to far-fetched excuses, there are also serious factors that can be identified and eliminated.

Hormonal background

A significant proportion of aggressive manifestations falls on hormonal imbalance. Our emotions are largely determined by the ratio of the main hormones, a lack or excess can lead not only to violent outbursts, but also to severe depression, to a pathological lack of emotions and severe psychiatric problems.

Testosterone is traditionally considered a hormone not only of sexual desire, but also of aggression. About especially sharp and often they say “testosterone male”. A chronic deficiency leads to an increase in dissatisfaction, makes a person prone to negative manifestations. Outbreaks of aggression in men, the causes of which lie precisely in hormonal imbalances, must be treated. To do this, tests are given for the level of hormones, a disease is detected that has led to violations. Symptomatic treatment in this case brings only partial relief and cannot be considered complete.

Middle age crisis

If such cases were not observed before, then sudden aggression in a 35-year-old man can most often be associated with the age of maximalism being left behind, and the man begins to weigh whether all the decisions made were really correct, whether it was a mistake. Literally everything falls into doubt: is this a family, is this a woman, is the right direction chosen in a career? Or maybe it was worth going to another institute and then marrying another, or not marrying at all?

Doubts and hesitation, a keen sense of missed opportunities - all this shatters the nervous system, reduces the level of tolerance and sociability. It begins to seem that there is still time to change everything in one jerk. Everyone around seemed to agree, they do not understand this spiritual impulse. Well, after all, they can be put in their place by force, since they do not understand good. Fortunately, the midlife crisis passes sooner or later. The main thing at the same time is to remember that periods of despondency are normal, but this is not a reason to break your life.

retirement depression

The second round of the age crisis overtakes men after retirement. Women most often endure this period easier - a solid part of everyday worries remains with them. But men who are accustomed to their profession as a central part of the life story begin to feel unnecessary, abandoned. Life stopped, the respect of others turned off along with the receipt of a pension certificate.

Aggression in men after 50 is closely related to attempts to shift the responsibility for a failed life onto others. At the same time, objectively, the man who suddenly caught the demon in the rib is all right, but there is a certain dissatisfaction. At the same time, all sorts of health problems, overwork, lack of sleep can be added - all these factors exacerbate the situation. Aggressive attacks begin to seem like a natural reaction to everything that happens.

Psychiatry or psychology?

To whom to go for help - to a psychologist or immediately to a psychiatrist? Many men are afraid of their aggressive impulses, not without reason fearing to do something irreparable. And it is very good that they are able to relatively soberly evaluate their actions and seek help from professionals. Who is involved in such a phenomenon as aggression in men? Causes and treatment are in the department of the psychiatrist exactly until he confirms that according to his profile the patient has no problems. This is precisely the correct approach to treatment by such a specialist: you can safely make an appointment without fear that you will be “dressed as crazy”. A psychiatrist is first and foremost a doctor, and he first checks to see if any completely physical factors affect the patient's psyche: hormones, old injuries, sleep disturbance. A psychiatrist can recommend a good psychologist if the patient does not have problems that require medication.

First step to problem solving

In many ways, the strategy for solving a problem depends on who exactly makes this decision. Aggression in a man ... What should a woman who is nearby, lives with him in the same house, brings up common children? Yes, of course, you can fight, convince, help, but if the situation develops in such a way that you have to constantly endure assault and risk losing your life, it is better to save yourself and save your children.

On the part of the man, the best first step is to admit that there is a problem. It is worth being honest with yourself: aggression is a problem that must be dealt with first of all by the aggressor himself, and not by his victims.

Possible consequences of aggression and complex work on oneself

We have to admit that in places of deprivation of liberty there are often prisoners who have precisely this vice - unreasonable aggression in men. Reasons need to be eliminated, but excuses have no power and weight. It is worth taking control of yourself, but not relying only on self-control. If the outbursts of rage are repeated, then the reason may lie in a violation of the hormonal balance. It can be overwork, depressive manifestations, as well as social pressure, an unbearable rhythm of life, age-related changes, some chronic diseases. Seeing a doctor is a sure step to help deal with destructive behavior. Separate the reasons from the excuses, this will help outline the initial plan of action, and soon life will sparkle with new colors.

An aggressive person is a real problem for others.

Thoughtless offensive words or an awkward movement can infuriate an interlocutor, neighbor, wife or husband, who becomes dangerous both for himself and for the people around him. An aggressive person can commit a crime that he will regret for the rest of his life. Why can't we always control our rage attacks? How to painlessly get rid of anger?

Why does a person become aggressive?

Each person has his own boiling point, in a few seconds the most balanced personalities can turn into reckless people if a sense of danger arises. Not only the personal qualities of a person affect the level of aggressiveness, the hormonal cocktail presented by nature has no less impact on this level.

Researchers in the field of the human psyche have concluded that the causes of aggressive human behavior are fluctuations in the levels of the following hormones:

Adrenalin;

norepinephrine;

Testosterone.

Adrenaline starts the rescue program, not everyone is endowed with norepinephrine, but people who instead of adrenaline splash norepinephrine into the blood will rather climb into battle than run away. Testosterone gives the character of a person a temper, and the higher the level of this hormone, the more aggressive the person.

The presence and amount of certain hormones explains the behavior of a person who becomes aggressive and why everyone, in their own way, can restrain their emotions. No one has yet learned to keep this reaction under complete control.

The study of inappropriate behavior was carried out by psychologist Erich Fromm, who identified two types of aggression.

1. Benign aggression is in the service of the cause of life. A person shows this type of aggression when his interests are threatened.

2. Malignant human aggression is an acquired reaction associated with cruelty or with a pathological feeling of self-assertion through aggressiveness.

With benign aggression, you can and should fight on your own. And people with malignant aggression need the help of psychologists or psychiatrists.

How to deal with an aggressive person?

If you do not allow aggressive people to splash out emotions, then they will begin to manifest themselves against the will of a person. Help relieve stress:

Sports or physical labor;

Favorite hobby;

Hiking;

Communication with pleasant and interesting people.

Maintaining emotional balance and timely release of negative emotions in these affordable ways will help you maintain health and good mood.

The beginning of the study of the psychological mechanisms of aggressiveness is associated with the name of Sigmund Freud, who singled out two fundamental instincts - life (the creative principle in a person, manifested in sexual desire, Eros) and death (the destructive principle, with which aggressiveness is associated, Thanatos). These instincts are innate, eternal and unchanging. Therefore, aggressiveness is an inherent property of human nature.

Accumulating energy aggressive drive from time to time it must be discharged in flashes of aggressiveness - such is the psychoanalytic interpretation. Psychologists who adhere to it believe that in order to avoid uncontrolled violence, the realization of aggressiveness, such energy must be constantly discharged (in observing cruel actions, destroying inanimate objects, participating in sports competitions, achieving positions of dominance, power, etc.).

There is a theory that likens the aggressiveness of a person to the behavior of animals and explains it purely biologically - as a means of surviving in the fight against other creatures, as a means of protecting and asserting oneself, one's life through destruction or victory over an opponent. Similar provisions are contained in the ethological theory of aggressiveness.

In this sense, a man, being an active defender of his life and relatives, is biologically programmed for aggressiveness. Thus, supporters of the ethological theory consider the aggressive behavior of a person as a spontaneous innate reaction. This point of view was reflected in the works of K. Lorenz. According to him, the nature of human aggressiveness is instinctive, as is the mechanism that prohibits the killing of their own kind. But Lorentz admits the possibility of its regulation and pins his hopes on education, strengthening the moral responsibility of people for their future. At the same time, other adherents of this theory believe that people, with all their desire, cannot exercise control over their aggressiveness, therefore wars, murders, skirmishes are inevitable, and in the end humanity will die in a nuclear war.

Over time, the most popular has become frustration-aggression theory. Its essence lies in the fact that any frustration creates an internal impulse or motive to be aggressive (D. Dollard).

Aggressive behavior has been studied in sufficient detail by behaviorists who have associated aggression with frustration. The latter refers to the emotional state that occurs when insurmountable obstacles appear on the way to achieving the desired goal. It is the inability to satisfy needs.

Therefore, any aggression is caused by a specific frustration.

Types of aggression:

• direct (scold, fight, etc.) or indirect (mockery, criticism);
• immediate (at the current time) or delayed;
• directed at another person or oneself (blaming oneself, crying, suicide).

Frustration and aggression arise as a result of social comparison: “I was given less than others”, “I am loved less than others”. Frustration can accumulate, reinforcing and reinforcing a person's aggressiveness or forming an inferiority complex in him (this is aggression against oneself). Ultimately, this spills out not at all on the culprit of frustration (he is stronger, thanks to him it arose), but on those who are weaker (although they are not actually to blame), or those who were considered an enemy.

Aggression- this is a one-sided reflection of reality fueled by negative emotions, leading to a distorted, biased, incorrect understanding of reality, to inadequate behavior.

Analysis often shows that aggression pursued some positive goal for a person, but the chosen way of behavior - unsuccessful, inadequate - leads to an aggravation of the conflict and a worsening of the situation. The stronger the frustration and neuroticism of the personality, the more and more acutely the inadequate aggressive behavior is realized.

In the theory of frustration - aggression, Berkowitz introduced three significant amendments:

1. Frustration is not necessarily realized in aggressive actions, but it stimulates readiness for them.
2. Even when ready for aggression, it does not arise without the proper conditions.
3. Getting out of frustration with the help of aggressive actions brings up a habit of such actions in a person.

Moreover, not all aggression is provoked by frustration. It can be conditioned, for example, by the "position of power" and the expression of authority.

A study of the conditions under which frustration gives rise to aggressive actions showed that the influence is exerted by the similarity / dissimilarity of the aggressors and the victim, the justification / unjustification of aggressiveness, its presence as a personal characteristic. At present, aggression is considered as a possible, but by no means inevitable, way out of a frustrating situation (Rosenzweig).

According to social learning theory, frustration and conflict facilitate the manifestation of aggression, being a necessary but not sufficient condition for its occurrence. In order for aggressive behavior to manifest itself, a predisposition to it in such situations is necessary. It is formed and consolidated through social learning - by observing the behavior of others, by one's own successful experience of aggression. Thus, the primary role in the formation of a predisposition to aggression is assigned to the social environment. This theory is currently the dominant one.

The most famous proponent of this approach is Arnold Bass. He defines frustration as blocking the process of desired behavior, introducing the concept of attack. It is an act that provides hostile stimuli to the organism. In this case, the attack causes a strong aggressive reaction, and frustration - a weak one.

Bass pointed to a number of factors that affect the strength of aggressive habits:

1. The frequency and intensity of cases when a person experienced an attack, frustration, irritation. People who have received many angry stimuli are more likely to react aggressively than those who have been exposed to such stimuli infrequently.
2. Repeatedly achieving success through aggression reinforces the corresponding habits. Success can be internal (a sharp decrease in anger, satisfaction) or external (removal of an obstacle or achievement of a desired goal or reward). The developed habit of aggression, attack makes it impossible to distinguish between situations when aggressive behavior is necessary; a person always tends to react aggressively.
3. Cultural and subcultural norms, assimilated by a person, facilitate the development of his aggressiveness (from childhood he watches cartoons and films where there are scenes of aggressive behavior, assimilates his norms).
4. The influence is exerted by a person's temperament: impulsivity, intensity of reactions, level of activity provoke the consolidation of aggressive forms of behavior and form aggressiveness as a personality trait.
5. The desire for self-respect, for protection from group pressure, for independence first causes a tendency to disobedience, and then, with the resistance of others, provokes a person to display aggression.

Bass believes that it is necessary to distinguish between types of aggressive behavior. The classification is based on dichotomies. As a result, physical / verbal, active / passive, directed / non-directed aggression are distinguished.

Purpose of physical aggression- causing pain or harm to another person. It is possible to assess the intensity of aggressive behavior by the likelihood that aggression will lead to injury and how severe it can be. Shooting at a person at close range is more aggressive than kicking him.

Verbal aggression also act as painful and offensive - as you know, a word can kill.

These include:

• numerous denials;
• negative reviews and criticisms;
• expression of negative emotions, such as dissatisfaction (swearing), hidden resentment, distrust, hatred;
• expressing thoughts and desires of aggressive content such as: “You need to be killed” or curses;
• insults;
• threats, coercion and extortion;
• reproaches and accusations;
• irony, mockery, offensive and offensive jokes;
• cry, roar;
• aggression in dreams, fantasies, expressed in words, mentally, less often in drawings.

Direct aggression is directly directed against the victim. The indirect one does not imply the presence of the first: slander is used, negative reviews or aggression is vented against objects representing the circle of the victim.

According to Bass, one should distinguish between hostility and aggressiveness. The first is expressed by a feeling of indignation, resentment and suspicion. A hostile person is not necessarily aggressive, and vice versa.

Another well-known supporter of the behavioral approach, A. Bandura, emphasized that if a person from childhood sees the aggressive behavior of people, especially parents, then by virtue of imitation he learns similar actions. Studies have shown that aggressive boys were raised by physically abusive parents. Such children could behave submissively at home, but in relation to their peers and strangers they showed more aggressiveness than their peers, who had a different situation in the family. That is why a number of researchers consider the physical punishment of a child as a model of aggressive behavior transmitted by adults. Punishment is effective only if a number of conditions are met, which include a positive attitude of the punisher to the punished and the acceptance by the punished of the norms of the punisher.

Finally, mention should be made of the most recent coercive force theory. Its essence is quite simple: physical violence (power of coercion) is used to obtain the desired effect when other methods (power of persuasion) have been exhausted (or absent).

In this regard, Fischbach singles out an instrumental type of aggression. This is a means to an end, in which causing damage is just a way of influencing. Hostile aggression, according to Fischbach, causes damage to the victim and can be seen as aggression for the sake of aggression.

However, the role of biological factors in the occurrence of aggressive behavior is not discounted. The subcortical structures of the brain, the hypothalamus, and the limbic system mediate it, imposing their own restrictions on the type of aggressive reactions acquired in the learning process. “One can imagine extreme cases when behavior is determined only by personality traits or only by the situation: in the first case it is something specifically psychopathological (an aggressive psychopath), in the second case it is extremely automated behavior of the “stimulus-response” type. But, as a rule, in intermediate cases, behavior is conditioned by both personal and situational factors and, moreover, is the result of mutual influence of individual predispositions and features of the current situation” (A. Bandura).

To date, a number of definitions of aggression have been proposed. Firstly, it means powerful activity, the desire for self-affirmation, an inner strength that allows a person to resist external pressure (F. Allan). Secondly, it means hostile actions and reactions, attacks, destruction, manifestation of force in an attempt to harm or damage another person, object or society (X. Delgado).

Scientists distinguish aggression(specific form of behavior) and aggressiveness(mental property of a person).

For example, Bass defines the first "as a response, as a physical action or threat of such action on the part of one person, which reduces the freedom or genetic fitness of another person, as a result of which the body of another person receives pain stimuli."

Currently, there are more and more supporters of the idea of ​​aggression as motivated external actions that violate the norms and rules of coexistence, causing harm, causing pain and suffering to people.

Not less important consider aggression not only as a behavior, but also as a mental state, highlighting the cognitive, emotional and volitional components. The first is understanding the situation as threatening. Some psychologists, such as Lazarus, consider the threat to be the main causative agent of aggression, believing that the latter causes stress, and aggression is a reaction to it. But not every threat leads to aggression or provokes it.

The emotional component is also important. Being aggressive, a person experiences strong anger, rage. But this is not always the case, and not every anger pushes to aggression. Emotional experiences of hostility, anger, revenge often accompany aggressive actions, although they do not always lead to them.

The volitional component is no less pronounced in the latter - purposefulness, perseverance, determination, initiative, courage.

Aggressiveness- a property of the individual, which consists in the willingness and preference for the use of violent means to achieve their goals. Aggression is a manifestation of aggressiveness in destructive actions aimed at harming a particular person.

The degree of aggressiveness varies - from barely noticeable to maximum. Probably, aggressiveness should be present in a harmoniously developed personality. The needs of individual development and social practice form in people the ability to remove obstacles, and sometimes even to physically overcome what opposes this process. The complete absence of aggressiveness leads to compliance, the inability to take an active life position. At the same time, its excessive development (as accentuation) begins to determine the whole appearance of the personality, turning the latter into a conflict, not going to social cooperation. In its extreme expression, it becomes a pathology (social and clinical): aggression loses its rational-selective orientation and turns into a habitual way of behavior, manifesting itself in unjustified hostility, malice, cruelty, and negativism.

Aggressive manifestations are:

• a means to achieve a specific goal;
• a way of psychological relaxation, replacement of a blocked need;
• end in itself;
• way to satisfy the need for self-realization and self-affirmation.

Cruelty- a personality trait that consists in indifference to the suffering of other people or in the desire to cause such, and conscious actions aimed at delivering torment, suffering to other people in order to achieve a certain external goal or self-satisfaction. Unintentional, careless actions (or unconscious), even if they lead to the most serious consequences, cannot be called cruel. The nature of cruelty is determined by the motives of the subject, when the infliction of suffering serves as the motive or purpose of behavior.

Aggression and cruelty- personality traits - are formed mainly in childhood and adolescence. Initially, they arise as concrete situational phenomena, the source of which is external circumstances. Aggressive, cruel actions of young children are not yet determined by the internal logic of their character, but are due to momentary motives without taking into account and understanding their moral significance. However, as a result of repeated repetition of such behavior, when there is no proper assessment and corrective actions, it gradually becomes stable, no longer associated with the specific situation in which it initially occurs, it turns into a personality trait.

Aggressive individuals, even in childhood and adolescence, develop a readiness to perceive, evaluate objects, situations, actions of other people as threatening or hostile and act towards them in accordance with this assessment. The attitudinal nature of such behavior is manifested in the fact that it is regulated not only on a conscious, but also on an unconscious level. Often, cruel, aggressive actions are not regarded by a person as such, but are considered natural, morally justified (this is due to the mechanisms of psychological defense and self-rehabilitation).

Murder or suicide, being forms of aggressiveness, is the result of distorted social development and incorrect psychological adaptation. Among those convicted of violent crimes, almost all had poor living conditions in childhood and adolescence. The moral and emotional environment in most families where these criminals came from did not provide the child with an even, calm upbringing, did not allow the formation of a sense of security and self-esteem, faith in life prospects. In such families, 30% of fathers abused alcohol, serious quarrels between parents were noted in 85%, and in 40% scandals were accompanied by assault. Such children 7 times more often than their peers felt indifference towards them, understood that they were burdened; they were almost twice as likely to be punished, 30% of the children were severely beaten by their parents.

In many such families, there was an opposition of the "mother-child" group to the father. The mother, perceiving the child as her ally in the psychological war with the father, justified any behavior of her son, including aggressive. When two hostile camps arise within the family, it is easier for children to learn the skills of aggressive behavior. This is due to the fact that observing aggression and experiencing it for yourself is combined with a high degree of willingness to use it with an immediate reward in the form of approval from the mother. Nobly acting on the side of a weak woman - mother, protecting her from the claims of a drunken father, a teenager has reason to consider his actions morally justified, which, naturally, strengthens the emerging stereotype of violent behavior. Thus, a significant role in the formation of the skills of violence belongs to the emotional conflict of the parents and the hostility that arises early between the father and the adolescent.

In most cases, the parents who raise and educate rapists are of the blame type. If this is combined with indifference, immoral behavior of the father and mother and the use of physical force by them both in conflicts between themselves and in relation to the child, then due to children's imitation and the lack of other life experience, the child is convinced that it is most simple to achieve what he wants through the rough physical coercion of another . Here are laid the distinctive features of criminals who have committed violence - hot temper, malice, vindictiveness, cruelty.

Children from dysfunctional families are less prepared for systematic schoolwork, more excitable, irritable, which makes it difficult for them to master the school curriculum, leading to difficulties and failures in their studies. But instead of help both at school and in the family, they hear accusations of laziness, stupidity, unwillingness to learn, they are punished. 60% of convicted adolescents noted that it was poor school performance that most often caused quarrels in their families.

The lack of approval and assistance from adults (parents, teachers) in the leading activity - study - leads to the fact that the most important needs of a child of this age - the approval of others, self-respect - begin to be blocked, gradually creating deep inner discomfort. In an effort to find a way out of this state, teenagers try to compensate for school problems with bravado, rudeness, disruption of order in lessons and breaks, and fights. Thus, failure in studies and rejection from the team is another major defeat on the path of life after the first inflicted by parents. Failures (frustrations) objectively push to search for other available means of self-affirmation.

The teenager tries to fill the vacuum formed in the positive system of communication, he searches for and finds peers similar to himself and acquires a social status in this group, gets the opportunity to satisfy the vital need for communication and recognition. If violent acts are common in an informal teenage group and the teenager is not only subjected to them, but also responds to them, he runs the risk of reinforcing the behavioral skills of aggressiveness. Quarrels, fights among themselves, the use of physical force in resolving conflicts with strangers reinforce the stereotype of behavior associated with the use of force as a means of resolving disputes.

The purpose of joint actions in teenage hooligan groups is the search for alcohol, as well as ethical and group self-affirmation in artificially created risky situations, a kind of revenge for personal failures, while the victims are the most defenseless people.

An attack is preceded by a psychological readiness to commit violence, which is most often formed by leaders, for example, by declaring: “Someone needs to be beaten.” The intent to kill before the attack is usually not discussed. This type of aggressive behavior can be called prey on the defenseless. No reason is required, only one condition is indispensable: confidence in a clear preponderance of forces and in impunity, therefore attacks occur in the evening and at night in deserted places, and lonely people turn out to be victims.

Motives for enrichment, personal revenge, jealousy and self-defense are usually absent; with the help of violence, a teenager usually tries to solve the problem of his self-affirmation. In childhood and at school, his status was extremely low, and with the support of friends like himself, for the first time he feels that he can force himself to be reckoned with, at least for a while turning into the master of the situation, asserts his importance through violence or hooliganism.

Consequently, hooliganism, aggression represent a transfer of the conflict that has developed in the family, the immediate social environment, into a completely different situation: beating a passerby on the street, debauchery, obscene language addressed to strangers. The transfer of unresolved conflicts to an anonymous defenseless environment is not accidental: it is in these conditions that adolescents can throw out their aggressiveness and achieve self-assertion with the greatest chance of situational success. For some young criminals, brutal murder, among other things, increases sexual self-esteem, allows you to assert yourself in the role of a full-fledged man - this is typical for rape, especially group rape, manifested in the murder of men who are undressed, deliberately hit on the genitals, etc.

Adolescence quickly passes, and with it the need to assert oneself on the street among peers, so the peak of aggressive criminal actions aimed at various anonymous environments (strangers) falls on the “young adults” age group and drops sharply after 24 years. This channel of aggressiveness is exhausting itself, as informal youth groups are gradually disintegrating, and their members have other interpersonal connections, primarily focused on their own families. For some young people, the appearance of their family becomes a powerful anti-criminogenic factor, eventually correcting the deformations that arose in childhood and adolescence. But for many, the family, on the contrary, is a zone of manifestation of aggressiveness and irritation.

It is known that the vast majority of serious crimes against a person are committed in the sphere of family and domestic relations: according to criminal statistics, 70% of intentional murders occur for this reason, of which, in turn, 38% are committed against relatives, and 62% against spouses .

Answering the question why the family so often becomes the main channel for the implementation of aggressive actions, we will designate four leading reasons for this.

1. The experience of life failures in early childhood, in education and professional development requires the search for new areas of self-affirmation that can “cover up” defeats and compensate for them. Thus, the expectations associated with the creation of their own family, in this case, are initially overstated.
2. The choice of a spouse, as a rule, is carried out from among persons of a certain circle, which means that it cannot radically change either the lifestyle of those entering into marriage, or the moral and psychological climate in the family, or the nature of future conflicts.
3. Members of one's own family are the most vulnerable target for violent attacks, since it is closed from many forms of social control from the outside.
4. The frequency, duration and continuity of intra-family conflicts escalate tension for years, sometimes decades, hence the sharp, dangerous forms of their resolution.

The reason for criminal conflicts on the part of husbands was reproaches to wives for immorality and refusal to continue living together, and on the part of wives - reproaches of husbands for wasting money earned, rudeness, drunkenness and beatings. Jealousy as a motive for a crime is indicated in 78% of cases, but in half of them the fact of infidelity is not confirmed during a judicial investigation. It seems that many husbands would rather explain the cooling of their wife by the presence of a lover, rather than admit that the reason for the discord lies in themselves - in their inattention, drunkenness, assault, sexual rudeness. The wife is guilty of all troubles, and evil is vented on her. This is all the more natural because the initiators of conflicts between spouses are twice as likely to be wives.

Violence as a way to influence the wife in dysfunctional families has become a well-mastered tool. They complete attempts to resolve conflicts in other ways (by persuasion, persuasion, threats). When these methods do not help, the extreme phase of the conflict begins - physical violence. It also has its own stages, and how quickly the escalation of aggression occurs depends significantly on the previous experience of the individual, which is updated in this situation. The specific role of spouses is to transform violent habits of behavior into everyday, habitual, ordinary actions. Their initial inefficiency pushes them to more dangerous actions: at first they beat only with their fists, then with everything that comes to hand.

Marital conflicts and deliberate killings clearly confirm the thesis "violence is the weapon of the weak." This refers to the social inferiority of the individual. Indeed, how can a man assert his position as a husband, father and head of the family, if he cannot serve as an example of personal behavior, does not possess the power of persuasion, is not able to provide the family with material well-being (his career is developing unsuccessfully), has lost his personal male attractiveness? Only the preponderance of physical strength remains; physical aggression achieves humility of the victim and self-affirmation. With the fall of the last support - the family - the meaning of life is often lost, so 30% of criminals made suicidal attempts after the murder.

Of particular interest is the aggression of adults directed against their parents. This logically follows from family troubles, being a kind of continuation of the conflict with parents that emerged in childhood. However, the new situation changes everything. The more acutely the child feels trouble in the family, the more likely it is that, as an adult, he will direct aggression at his parents. This happens especially often if they are forced to live with others, drink alcohol, or when each side seeks to dictate its terms.

If the victim is a woman, she resorts to insults, domestic harassment, sometimes provokes violence, and the perpetrator beats her. If the victim turned out to be a man, then the conflicts result in fights. All the same, the outcome is predetermined by the physical superiority of the younger over the elderly and aged. As a result, the circle closes: brought up in a dysfunctional, conflicting family, who has not found a place in life and has not managed to create his own prosperous family, who has received personal skills of violence in informal groups, the subject returns to his parents, because he has nowhere to go, and then criminal aggressive actions against relatives become the result of the actual disintegration of the group "parents - adult children".

Staying in places of deprivation of liberty, as a rule, deepens aggressiveness, anger, suspicion in the character of convicts, forms in their minds an image of an aggressive environment. Aggression (in the subjective assessment of criminals) must pre-empt counter encroachment and prevent it. Places of deprivation of liberty affect the personality of the convict in such a way that the likelihood of aggressive and violent actions on his part increases.

Taught by experience to give a constant rebuff and defend himself from encroachments in a criminal environment, he involuntarily transfers his attitudes to freedom, hence the inadequacy of his reactions, increased hostility and aggressiveness with minor signs of real or imaginary danger, in any conflicts, which can lead to new crimes and murders . In fact, 30% of the total number of those convicted of premeditated murder had previously been convicted and served their sentences in places of deprivation of liberty.

Having traced the typical development of aggressiveness, realized to an extreme degree (deliberate murder), we see that many different social, family factors increase its natural level, which initially, for biological reasons (the male hormone testosterone plays a special role), is higher in men than in men. women.

Criminals who have committed violence, as a rule, have an internally hidden sense of their own inferiority. It pushes them through aggression to increase the level of self-esteem, to express a clearly inflated sense of self-worth, to strive for self-assertion at any cost (through humiliation or destruction of others). This happens with a negative attitude towards social, ethical norms and requirements of society, as well as with indifference to one's own future, lack of life plans, increased emotional impulsivity.

Among these criminals there is a group of people called aggressive psychopaths, whose antisocial behavior is associated with certain brain dysfunctions, with an insufficiently formed system of internal behavior regulators, with a defective consciousness. As a result, they are characterized by impulsive psychopathic aggression, the hallmarks of which are:

1. The inability to restrain the first impulsive impulse, since the processes of self-regulation are violated.
2. The inability to imagine the consequences of their actions.
3. An extremely limited (usually fistic) set of means for resolving interpersonal conflicts, combined with increased cruelty.
4. Immunity to punishment, that is, the application of punitive sanctions to this group of criminals has the opposite effect, causing an outbreak of aggressiveness.

Aggressive psychopaths often commit murders, especially cruel ones, of strangers, children without any reason. This is the most extreme version of male aggressiveness - senseless and impulsive.

Thus, the aggressiveness of a person is heterogeneous, its degree is different - from the minimum to the maximum, its modality and purpose are not the same. A number of parameters of aggressiveness of various modality are distinguished, which differ:

• intensity of aggression, its cruelty;
• directed at a specific person or generally at all people;
• situationality or persistence of aggressive personality tendencies. Conditionally, the following can be distinguished types of aggressiveness
  1. Anti-aggressiveness. Negative attitude to any aggressive manifestations; a person always tries to reconcile with other people, considers it impossible for himself to beat the weak, a woman, children, a cripple; in the event of a conflict, he believes that it is better to leave, endure or turn to the police, defends himself only in case of a clear physical attack.
  2. Intrinsive, or conditionally aggressive. It is motivated by the satisfaction derived from performing conditionally aggressive activities (games, wrestling, competitions) and does not aim to cause harm. Sport is a socially acceptable form of manifestation of aggression, a kind of defusing it, as well as a way
  3. self-affirmation, raising social status and receiving material benefits (for professional athletes).
  4. Undifferentiated. This is a weak aggressive manifestation, expressed in irritability and scandals for any reason and with a variety of people, in temper, harshness, rudeness. Such people can resort to physical aggression and even commit crimes on family and domestic grounds.
  5. Local, or impulsive. Aggression manifests itself as a direct reaction to the conflict, a person verbally insults the enemy (verbal aggression), but also allows the possibility of using violence, etc. The degree of general irritation is less than in the previous case.
  6. Conditional, or instrumental. Associated with self-affirmation; her example is boyish fuss.
  7. Hostile. Persistent emotions of anger, hatred, envy; a person shows his hostility openly, but does not seek to clash. Real physical aggression may or may not be active. Hatred can be directed both at specific individuals and at strangers. There is a desire to humiliate another person, towards whom contempt and hatred are felt, in order to gain the respect of others. In a fight, this type is cold-blooded, in case of victory, he remembers her with pleasure. He can restrain his aggression at first, and then takes revenge (in various ways: slander, intrigue, physically). In the event of a preponderance of forces and impunity, he is capable of committing murder. People are hostile.
  8. Instrumental. It is used to achieve some significant goal.
  9. Cruel. Violence and aggression are ends in themselves; aggressive actions are always inadequate, characterized by excessive, maximum cruelty and special anger. For its manifestation, an insignificant reason is enough. Crimes are committed with exceptional cruelty.
  10. Psychopathic. Violent and often senseless, repetitive aggression (this is how an aggressive psychopath, a maniac-killer behaves).
  11. group solidarity. Aggression or even murder is committed because of the desire to follow the traditions of the group, to establish itself in its eyes, to gain approval, to show one's strength, determination, fearlessness. This type of aggression often manifests itself among teenagers. Military aggression (the actions of military personnel in combat conditions, the killing of an enemy) is a socially recognized and approved form associated with group (or national) solidarity. It implements the social traditions of defending the fatherland or other ideas, such as democracy, law and order, etc.
  12. Sexy. The range of its manifestation is wide - from sexual rudeness to rape or sexual abuse and murder. Freud wrote that in the sexuality of most men there is aggressiveness, a desire to subjugate, so sadism is just an isolation and hypertrophy of such a component.

The connection between sex and aggression is also confirmed experimentally. Endocrinologists stated that the aggressive behavior of males and their sexual activity are due to the influence of the same hormones - androgens, and psychologists have found that pronounced elements of aggressiveness are present in erotic fantasies, and partly in the sexual behavior of men. At the same time, the suppression of sexual desires and dissatisfaction increase irritation and give rise to aggressive impulses. Similarly, a woman's refusal to satisfy a man's sexual desire causes him to become aggressive.

Conditioned aggression and sexual arousal seem to interact in humans in a manner similar to that observed in some animals, mutually reinforcing each other. For example, in teenage boys, erections often occur during fuss, power struggles, but never in a real fight. A love game, when a man, as it were, hunts for a woman, overcoming her seeming resistance, excites him, that is, the conditional "rapist" also acts as a seducer. But there is a group of men who can experience sexual arousal and pleasure only in the case of real aggression, violence, beating, humiliation of a woman. Such pathological sexuality often turns into sadism, leads to murder.

To diagnose the level of aggressiveness, you should use the Bass-Darkey questionnaire.

Hello dear readers. In this article, we will talk about what makes a person aggressive. You will find out what goals such a person pursues. You will become aware of how aggressiveness manifests itself. You will figure out how to deal with these people.

Definition of concept and types

Aggressiveness is such a concept, which means the desire to cause some harm to the object at which aggression is directed. The manifestation of aggressiveness can be directed both at the surrounding people, objects, and at the aggressor himself.

The form of aggression is of the following types:

• straight;
• physical, such as beating and rape;
• verbal, for example, threat, slander;
• indirect, for example, malicious jokes;
• instrumental - a way to achieve the goal;
• emotional - a state of affect.

Let's look at what types of aggression are.

1. Impulsive and controlled, depending on the state in which the person is at the moment.
2. Involuntary, when there is no control over their actions and arbitrary, when causing pain is an intentional action.
3. Situational aggression is also distinguished - it occurs under the influence of certain factors. When they are eliminated, anger disappears. Aggression as a character trait - a person is constantly angry.
4. Based on whether a person was able to achieve his goal by using aggression, a destructive and constructive state is distinguished. In the first case, such behavior brought only harm, in the second - success.

Pursued goals

Aggressive behavior can occur when a person has certain aspirations in life.

1. The desire to have power over other people, to force them to any behavior, actions that are pleasing to the aggressive individual. In particular, here we are talking about moral violence against other people.
2. A way to make a special impression. When an aggressive personality appears in a team, it can cause fear in someone, a desire for rivalry in someone, someone wants to take revenge.
3. Method of psychological relaxation. When a person accumulates negative emotions throughout the day, an objectionable person comes across on hand, on which he manages to discharge himself, throwing out the accumulated stress.
4. Striving for power. As you know, it is almost impossible to achieve this peacefully. You always have to go over the heads and cause someone at least minimal, but harm. People who want to rule tend to be more aggressive than others. Males are the most prone to this.
5. The desire to harm someone. Situations where there are individuals who deserve to be treated aggressively, for example, provoked by the desire to avenge the pain caused. Aggression of this nature is characteristic of almost all people.
6. Self defense method. Some individuals behave too arrogantly, stubbornly, you should not stoop to their level, but in some situations it is better to show your “teeth” so that you are not eaten.

You have become aware of the main goals for the emergence of an aggressive character. You need to understand that in some cases aggression is simply necessary. Society is unable to survive if people do not show hostility towards each other. Therefore, attempts to save all people from aggression are doomed to failure. Although individual individuals manage to avoid this.

Possible causes of aggression

Psychology identifies a number of factors that affect the development of aggression.

1. Instinct. Aggression affects a person's ability to survive in difficult environmental conditions, it helps to fight for their own territory, fight for food resources, protect offspring, and increase the gene pool. The energy of aggression is produced in the human body, gradually accumulates, eventually breaks out. Each person has a certain line, stepping over which, there is hostility in behavior. Aggressiveness can also be a hereditary trait passed down from hunters who were our ancestors. Naturally, such a nature can become an incentive for destruction, violence, and wars. In this case, we are talking about the inevitable development of aggression and difficulties with its control.
2. Influence of an example of adults. When a child grows up and sees an example of a father or mother in front of him, he begins to imitate them in dressing, a way to carry on a conversation. There is also an imitation of aggressive behavior. If a child regularly sees his parents arguing, yelling at each other, then he considers that such behavior is normal.
3. Wrong parenting model. When adults are too demanding of their baby, find fault with him or directly say that the child behaved aggressively towards other children, knew how to hit back, punish.
4. The result that arose due to the inability to fulfill oneself. When a person encounters any obstacle on the way to achieving what he wants, he involuntarily develops aggression, which can be directed at the environment and himself. And it's good if such behavior rarely happens.
5. The situation in the family. For example, children who grow up without a father or mother may begin to behave aggressively towards other people. Another option is families with many children, where there is a confrontation between brothers and sisters. Also of great importance is the way in which parents punish children for misconduct.

When answering the question why a person is aggressive, it is worth considering the factors that can influence the occurrence of such behavior, aggravate it and make it destructive:

• features of education;
• the situation in society;
• cultural features - some encourage aggression;
• Mass media that broadcast about violence, which leads to the opinion that such a phenomenon is normal and increases the risk of developing an aggressive population.

Characteristic manifestations

Aggression is manifested by the following signs:

• physical violence;
• attempts to hurt
• mistrust and suspicion;
• self-flagellation;
• resistance;
• verbal negative expressions;
• physical violence.

Aggression is manifested in human behavior. He:

• breaks furniture;
• slams the door;
• bites;
• beats dishes;
• expressed in obscene language.

Features of communication with an aggressive personality

Let's look at the rules for how to behave next to a person experiencing aggression.

1. Learn to move away from conflict situations. Thus, you can protect yourself from a number of reciprocal feelings. There is no need to be led to provocations, to respond with open anger to aggression. In a situation where there is a collision with a dangerous person, it is better to flee altogether.
2. Adjustment. Sometimes it's worth using the "chameleon" effect. In such a situation, the chances of reassurance increase. The essence of this method is to tune in to the same wave with an aggressive opponent, you can also speak out in a raised voice, but not express aggression directed at a person, gradually reducing the tone of the conversation.
3. Self control. You need to be able to resist, not to start throwing out aggression on the offender. Say to yourself that you are reserved, calm, and safe.
4. Think about the motives of the incident, why the aggressor behaves this way towards you. Be objective in your reflections, perhaps your actions provoked a person to this.
5. Watch your body language. In such a situation, be as open as possible, stay straight, exclude crossed arms or legs, look your opponent in the eye.

1. Let him talk, let him talk about the sore.
2. After the person has calmed down, you can ask him a few clarifying questions to make sure that you have correctly understood his claims.
3. It is important at this moment to control your emotions, voice, be self-confident and not afraid.
4. If necessary, express sympathy.
5. If it is in your power to correct something, somehow influence the situation, help the person cope with his problem.

Now you know what to do if a person behaves aggressively. As you can see, there can be many factors that influence such behavior. Knowing about the possible reasons for the development of aggression, warn yourself against such behavior. If there are aggressive personalities among your relatives or friends, use the rules for communicating with them suggested in this article.

Aggression and aggressiveness have always been part of our world, people are constantly faced and continue to face these phenomena in their daily lives. Aggression is a certain type of action aimed at causing moral or physical damage to other people, this is an attack on them with the aim of causing harm. And aggressiveness is not just a trait of a person's character, in which he reacts aggressively to everything, but it is also a natural manifestation of his bestial essence.

Aggressive behavior is inherent primarily in less intellectually developed people, and at the same time, people who are quite active, whose endless desires are supported by great opportunities. Being weak and feeling weak, a person will not attack other people, because fear will not allow him to do this. But feeling his strength and seeing the opportunities that it gives, a person acts more boldly, more assertively, more aggressively. Consequently, weak people are less aggressive than strong people, but nevertheless, the aggression of weak people can be expressed in a hidden form, which is sometimes no less, if not more dangerous, than an open form of aggression.

No matter how strong or weak we are, we are still very aggressive creatures by nature and our aggression is primarily associated with the need to defend our interests in this cruel world, in a world of limited resources and boundless selfishness. Therefore, one should perceive one's bestial essence positively, since nature endowed us with it not by chance, it is simply necessary for us to survive. We have created a world in which even the weakest human beings can survive, while in nature only the strongest survive, only those who can fight not only for their lives, but also for a place in the sun. Our world, the world of people, is an unreal world, an artificial world in which aggression and aggressiveness are perceived negatively, while in the wild, this phenomenon is natural and necessary. Aggressive behavior does not need an ethical assessment and interpretation on our part, it simply exists, and has always existed in our lives, as a natural and, as mentioned above, a necessary, innate form of behavior. And as you and I are constantly convinced of this, even in our seemingly civilized world, bestial laws often operate under which it is important for a person to be able, as they say, to awaken the beast in himself.

The fact that aggression has an emotional connotation is primarily due to the fact that for a targeted attack, for an attack, for a powerful and lightning strike aimed at destroying his enemy or his victim, a person needs a lot of energy. And he draws energy from his emotions, which, although they turn off his thinking, but at the level of instincts allow him to act very effectively. But at the same time, the maximum effectiveness of the aggressor's actions is more related to the rationality of his behavior than to the strength of his emotions. Remember the words of Muhammad Ali - to flutter like a butterfly and sting like a bee? Anger, anger, aggression, and generally nonsense, need to be controlled by the mind, then the aggressive behavior of a person will be more effective. In fact, the infliction of harm by one person to another person, or any damage, without special need, is an unnatural manifestation of aggression. Humans, in addition to their hostility, also have a tendency to cooperate, like other animals, which, if necessary, huddle in packs or in herds. And with such behavior, when it is important for a person to establish cooperation with other people, it is more useful for him not so much to be aggressive as to be able to find a common language with all people, or at least with most of them, for which he needs to develop his thinking. Do you think we are so nice to each other, just because of ethical education? Nothing like that, in most cases, we are forced to be polite with other people, and forced to reckon with their opinions and their interests. But when we have the opportunity not to do this, when everything depends only on our decision - to be or not to be a person who respects other people, we often make a decision not in favor of these very other people. A person with great potential, often without any twinge of conscience, harms other people for the sake of his interests and his boundless selfishness. Therefore, we all need to be moderately aggressive in order for our aggression to be a deterrent to the exorbitant ambitions of other people. Being aggressive when it is actually required is very useful, since in every society, without exception, a person needs to be able to protect his interests and be able to position himself correctly in order to take the most advantageous position in comparison with other people, preferably the position of a leader.

But the most important thing that you and I should understand is that the aggression of smart people differs in form from the aggression of stupid people, or, better to say, wild and underdeveloped people. Nevertheless, the content of aggressive actions remains unchanged, with any personal differences between people. I would even say that in some, but not all, cases, the aggressive actions of smart and very smart people can be much more dangerous than similar actions on the part of fools. Disguised, as a rule, under good intentions, the aggression of some very literate people does not meet with resistance precisely because of its non-obviousness. And, unfortunately, for most people, the common truth that the road to hell is paved with good intentions remains empty words, heard and repeated many times, but never understood. We all need something from this world and from other people, and many of us are ready to go to great lengths in order to take more of someone else's and give less of our own. And often people take their toll precisely through aggressive behavior, through violence, which can only be resisted with the help of reciprocal violence.

That's when we observe aggressiveness in children, we must understand that the matter is not in the abnormality of the child, it is in his natural desire for leadership, in his desire to form his environment at his own discretion. You can find a lot of information on child aggression, and in most cases it will tell you that an aggressive child is not normal, or not quite normal. But in fact, this is not so, or rather, not quite so. The fact is that in children, among their insufficient development, aggression is expressed in a very primitive form, it cannot be hidden, as in some cunning adults, when we do not see obvious signs of aggression against us or against someone else. but we suffer from it. Well, for example, in our society there is such a thing as legitimate violence, that is, legal, just violence, which most people accept as a forced necessity that cannot be dispensed with. The most striking example of such violence is the death penalty, which, allegedly, is a fair punishment for especially dangerous criminals. But, in most cases, legitimate violence is not at all legitimate and quite even unfair. It is simply cultivated and ennobled by the good intentions of the aggressor, who uses the opportunities available to him and harms another person. It must be understood that even the most dangerous criminals did not appear out of nowhere. They were not born what they later became, they became what their parents, society and the environment in general made them.

But we, committing violence against criminals, consider it quite justified and do not notice that there are no fewer crimes in our life, although, of course, the severity of the laws somewhat pacifies some hotheads. Nevertheless, from the point of view of effectiveness, it is absolutely pointless to fight the effect, and not the cause of violence, and the fact that we are doing this speaks of our aggressiveness, which is expressed in a somewhat unhealthy form. We don't solve the problem of crime in our society when we punish criminals, we just more or less control it. But, firstly, it is possible to solve this problem, and secondly, it is more useful for each of us. Why doesn't anyone get it right? But because every problem needs someone who is able to solve it, which means that society will always depend on someone's power over themselves, which solves unsolvable problems. So I think there is no need for me to explain to you how such a dependence of society on an iron hand can be beneficial for some, far from the most stupid people. In general, we do not have any legitimate violence now, there is simply violence that we put up with, or with which we are forced to put up with. It follows from this that even in the most civilized and cultured society, some people who have the necessary opportunities for this, systematically commit violent acts against other, weaker people. And we have not yet come up with anything else, more effective against aggression, except for adequate retaliatory aggression, which is capable of protecting us. Well, if it were otherwise, we would only be doing that turned the other cheek under attack, instead of creating weapons, forming an army, having a police force, arming and so on.

So it turns out that from early childhood, a person is not only inclined, but even drawn to commit violence against other people. It turns out because, firstly, our ambitions are initially prohibitively high, and secondly, within ourselves, we instinctively understand that either we or us. And aggression simply moves us in this direction, towards domination over other people, it points us to goals without offering means to achieve them, because this is already the task of our brain. And only the fear of punishment serves as a prevention of aggression, and then only in those cases when it comes to people who are able to feel this fear. No fear will stop a fool, therefore, the severity of laws does not play a role for him, and with the exception of the likelihood of a fool appearing at all, as we found out above, no one in our society does or plans to do it. So it is precisely the need that makes a person behave more or less benevolently towards other people, and look for ways to cooperate with them. Whether we like it or not, violence in our society is the norm, not the exception, and despite our negative attitude towards it, it happens regularly. Each of us, at least once in a lifetime, has become a victim of violence in one form or another. Even the same deception that is encountered today at every turn is also violence, this is the violence of a mentally developed person over a less developed one. We, quite naturally, consider it a crime with you when an adult deceives a child, and, say, persuades him to have sexual intercourse? This is aggression, right? Well, why don't we treat the same situations with adults in a similar way, who, despite their age, can sometimes be much dumber than children? Do we consider it acceptable for our lives to take advantage of other people's stupidity, or have we been told that this is normal?

Deception, as a manifestation of more sophisticated and cultivated aggression, usually replaces more primitive, physical aggression, which we perceive more emotionally, and therefore we are able to more or less correctly interpret all rather primitive actions of other people. But it is precisely this ability, the ability to show their aggressiveness culturally, that children lack, who are forced to behave more openly, more primitively and more predictably, thus achieving, in fact, the same goals as adults, that is, achieving recognition, leadership position in their environment and success, in the end. Why do we have an extremely negative attitude towards the killer who killed only a few people, but at the same time we perceive the tobacco or alcohol business, and those who stand behind it, in a completely normal way, despite the fact that these businessmen kill people by the millions? Are we so smart that we are not able to appreciate and understand the scale of such evils? Or are we so cowardly that we are forced to put up with one violence and oppose another? Each person has his own answer to this question, depending on his level of development and his honesty, especially with himself.

Psychology, my friends, is what you and I need to explain to us the patterns of our behavior, and not to interpret it. Otherwise, we would not call it science. If there is violence in your life, and you are its victim, then you can seek help from a priest or an inadequate psychologist who will help you accept this violence, come to terms with it, forgive the aggressor and, in some cases, allow him to continue to do violence against you and further. You need it? How long are you going to turn the other cheek and let other people abuse you? Maybe you should seek help from adequate people, adequate psychologists who will help you protect yourself? Your instincts will tell you the answers to these questions - trust them. Try to seek help from those who are really able to help you, regardless of your personal beliefs and attitude towards this or that person. It is necessary to be able to deal with violence, aggressive behavior must always, remember, always be rebuffed, otherwise it will be impossible to cope with it. But in order to rebuff this very one, it is necessary to be able to do it, and so that peace-loving people do not propagandize there, every blow can and should be answered, with exactly the same blow, but better with a stronger blow. An aggressive person, if he retreats from his excessive ambitions, then only if he meets a rebuff in the form of no less, if not more, aggressiveness from other people whose interests he decided to encroach on. In such cases, they say - I found a scythe on a stone. Or - there is no reception against scrap, except for another such scrap.

Do not think that our not the most beautiful behavior, and even absolutely anti-social behavior, is the result of our primitiveness. Aggression and aggressiveness are often quite a conscious decision and a carefully thought-out policy aimed at achieving a person's goals at the expense of other people. Every person striving to realize their desires always has the opportunity to show aggression against someone weaker, and I assure you, many people use this opportunity. Some people create opportunities for themselves in which they can take advantage of someone else's weakness to achieve their goals. To do this, they make other people stupid, through a certain psychological and ideological influence on them. V. I. Lenin said: “While the people are stupid and uneducated, the most important art for us is cinema and the circus.” But, I thought so, and came to the conclusion that this circus and cinema are needed in order for the people to be stupid. If you are very smart people, you will be able to resist any aggression, which means that you will not just be subjugated to your will. But if you are illiterate, stupid, disorganized, not cohesive, and even intimidated people, then you can do anything with you. Moreover, your ill-conceived and in some cases completely inappropriate benevolence and openness will make you an easy prey for a more aggressive and insidious person who will certainly take advantage of all your weaknesses to his advantage. And you will not oppose anything to someone else's aggression, no matter in what form it will be expressed, if you yourself are white and fluffy.

I am not saying that your response to any aggression against you must necessarily be a mirror image, and it cannot always be so, since we all have different opportunities. But it must be - your answer. Not by force, so by cunning, not by cunning, so by intelligence, not by intelligence, so by pity and sycophancy, but we must be able to repulse our enemies. Otherwise, we will simply be destroyed. In each person, I repeat - in each, there are strengths. If in principle you are not an aggressive person and cannot be one, then look for other ways to protect yourself and defend your interests. I consider aggression any human activity aimed at confronting other people or suppressing other people, no matter how. If someone tries to deceive me, for me this is an aggressive person, if someone proves to me that he is subjectively right in order to push his interests through me, for me this is also an act of aggression. So not necessarily psychosis and physical violence, savagery and cruelty, are a manifestation of aggressive behavior, any unequal relationship between people in which one person uses another person for his own purposes is aggression.

Why is that? Yes, because in this world, there can be as many conventions as you like, while according to the laws of nature, which we cannot bypass, any use of one's capabilities by one creature against another creature can be considered aggression. Here we must understand that it does not matter what methods are used by people to achieve their goals related to obtaining benefits at the expense of another person or other people. All those causes of aggression with which we are dealing, from the point of view of our nature, are fully justified. As well as our unwillingness to obey someone else's will and oppose it in every possible way - this is also a natural reaction of a person to aggression against him. It is not natural to serve other people at will, and not to understand that it is not natural for you. This is really an unhealthy human perception of reality. Therefore, it is so important to understand exactly when and how someone acts against us, so as not to be surprised by the unplanned results that each of us receives in our lives. Well, will it really matter to you how you are forced to work for someone - at gunpoint or by creating conditions under which you will be forced to do as someone needs you to do? Only, perhaps, for your emotional state it will have some meaning, but not for the situation as a whole. If, as a result of a certain influence on you by other people, you are forced to serve someone, then it does not matter at all how you were forced to do this, aggression was committed against you in any case. Simply, not very smart people do not react to the unstructured management of them, that is, to management carried out through manipulation, as something negative. This means that such people do not consider aggression those phenomena due to which they are forced to obey other people's instructions and serve other people's interests, contrary to their own desire, true desire, and their own interests. And if you don’t see your enemy, then you can’t fight him, because you don’t understand what kind of threat you need to counter, which means you can’t find the necessary means to adequately counter this threat or threats. Therefore, it is very important to recognize aggression in any of its manifestations, preferably in the early stages, and only then learn to adequately respond to it.

So don’t keep the beast inside you, in a cage, let it have the opportunity to show its qualities in situations that are especially difficult for you, when you are in real danger. The only thing an aggressive person really needs is to control his aggressive state. We must be able to manage ourselves and our emotions, which can only be done through our mind, which must be developed and forced to work. A primitive person reacts quite emotionally to everything, the more emotions there are in a person's behavior, the less rationality there is in this behavior. But as soon as we accustom ourselves to constantly think before acting, we accustom our brain to analyze the situation and the information that comes to us, to reason about it, to calculate various scenarios for the development of events with certain of our actions, then our emotions fade into the background, and we can control our behavior. Including, due to the activity of our thinking, we will be able to control our aggression, not fighting it, but competently managing its energy.

Pay attention to how many conflict situations arise in our life. People constantly argue about something, quarrel among themselves, commit violence against each other. To the best of their ability, every person, I repeat, everyone, do not think that you are different, seeks to dominate someone, to control someone. And with such a desire, conflicts are inevitable. We even within the framework of our family do not know how to live in peace and harmony. But in fact, there is no difference between family quarrels and big wars, in which many people die, because in both cases, human egoism, the human desire to dominate and defend one's interests, meets with exactly the same desire from the outside. other people or with their opposition to this desire. And there is a conflict. The scale of only different conflicts can be different, with family quarrels, fewer people suffer than during a big war. But if you pay attention to the general statistics of domestic violence, it turns out that all family quarrels and the violence that follows them is a very big war.

And in war, as in war, there is no time for sentimentality and tenderness, it needs to be both tough and aggressive and at times very cruel. To protect our lives, as well as the lives of those dear to us, we definitely need to be able to be aggressive. In everyday life, we can and must be civilized and cultured people in order to maintain that more or less acceptable atmosphere in society for us and our life. But when we are forced to confront other people, when we are forced to defend our interests and protect our values, as well as the life I have already mentioned, then we need to use everything that nature has given us, including aggression and our other bestial qualities. Many in this life will try to test you for firmness in order to find your weaknesses and use them to bend you to their will. And if you cannot or do not want to properly respond to these hostile attempts to bend you, then it can cost you dearly. Many people, only seemingly reasonable, in fact, really intelligent people are very rare, while people who are primitive and very aggressive by nature, we are forced to meet much more often. And we need to be able to interact with them, no matter how we treat them. Each of us has a certain set of qualities that can be used for both good and bad deeds. And you can pursue any goals in your life, not paying attention to the means to achieve them, but at the same time your behavior will always be reflected in an adequate attitude towards you from other people.

You would do a lot in your own way in this life, if it were your will, you would definitely use many, many for your own purposes, if you could. And you definitely would not reckon with some people who are wrong from your point of view, seeking from them the actions you need, if they only let you give a damn about themselves. You are neither a good nor a bad person, you are just a person with the qualities inherent in this being. You will always want more than what you already have, and your aggression, in one form or another, will always come out. And only the fear of retaliatory violence will stop you from committing some not very good deeds that will seem necessary to you, or at least desirable for you, at one time or another in your life. See for yourself how much our life depends on that fear of punishment, without which we are not able to maintain normal human relationships with each other. Without a legitimate form of violence, or rather, without its illusion, it is generally impossible to create at least a somewhat normal society that will not be mired in civil strife. We should not consider ourselves too rational beings, for rational beings do not need a stick to do what they need to do, and not how they want to do it. And as long as we think more about the fact that we are very developed beings, but not being such in reality, aggression and aggressiveness will be companions of our life.

It is important for each of us to keep any of our emotions under control, including aggression. Animals are no less aggressive than we are, but as you can see for yourself, it is not they who conquered us, but we conquered them and keep them under control. Therefore, it is important for us not so much to rely on our natural instincts as on our mental development, which has always moved us forward and helped us achieve outstanding results. Aggression we should transform into energy stimulating our activity. Do you dislike something, do you hate someone, do you want to destroy your enemies, are you very angry with other people? Well, it happens in our life and you can understand. But because of this, you don’t need to wake up the beast in yourself and throw yourself at people with wild cries, solving all your problems with the help of brute force, this is too dangerous and too ill-conceived in most cases. Better turn on your brains and look for a solution to your problems with the help of them. And your aggressiveness will give you the energy with which you will force yourself to work on solving all your problems.

Wildness, friends, is only appropriate in a wild environment, and if you do not want to constantly worry about your back, into which a knife can be stuck, then do not cynically take advantage of other people's weaknesses to your advantage. Remember that each person contributes to the atmosphere of the society in which he lives.